The Archers Mon 13th Sept 2010: rubbish in the new bird hide

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The Archers: Scruff is very barky … Joe’s toenails … Brian tells BL about Matt … Joe and Bert clash

• Not a very ‘shocking’ discovery
• Scruff’s no match for Brian’s Land Rover
• “You can cut my toenails now”
• Eddie needs his constitutional
• “Rather attractive bowl of fruit”
• Not on Joe’s watch!

Not a very ‘shocking’ discovery

There was me thinking the ‘shocking’ discovery in the bird hide might have been a dead body, or someone dead drunk, or even a couple getting dead romantic.

But it turned out to be larger cans, cigarette butts and cider.

Lynda was typically horrified, with both her and Bert deciding to blame teenagers.

Which Lynda seemed to decide after she’d spotted the leftover cider.

Lynda later rants to Clarrie about how riotous teenagers are completely the parents fault. Clarrie of course defends both parents and teens (she could hardly agree, with the state her Edward and William got into).

Hmmm.

I wouldn’t be so fast to blame the Hoodie set.

Could it be a Grundy? Or Kenton?

Or event Lynda’s own Robert? She did say he was in the bird hide the previous evening.

Has he finally cracked?


Scruff’s no match for Brian’s Land Rover

I wouldn't be so sure. Maybe not on direct impact, but in the right conditions ...



“You can cut my toenails now”

Is there no end to the debasement of Clarrie?

While talking to Lynda (gossiping about Kenton and Kathy), Joe appears at the door in his bathrobe, feet washed and ready for Clarrie to cut his toenails.

Yuk!


Eddie needs his constitutional

So after cutting Joe’s toenails, Clarrie also needs to take Eddie out for a constitutional (a la Lynda and Scruff), or he’ll also be “impossible for the rest of the day”.

Honestly, no wonder the woman gossips. What a life of drudgery.


“Rather attractive bowl of fruit”

At an early Borchester Land meeting (10am – the poor poppets), the coffee may be rubbish, but at least Brian finds something rather alluring in the fruit provided.

Breaking the news that they’ll have to buy the access land from Matt, the board is understandably perturbed that they’ll have to deal with Matt again – and rather horrified to think that he wants them to share their fruit with Lilian.

Assuming that Lilian would just be Matt’s stooge – which I think is completely underestimating Lilian – they simply can’t agree to Matt’s terms.

Then Brian makes his big announcement of a cunning plan. Which is … to do absolutely nothing.

“Standing firm” means they’ll give Matt a decent price for the land (or at least “fair” by Brian’s standards), but they won’t accept Lilian onto the BL board. Brian’s reasoning is that the land is fairly worthless unless BL buys it, and with Matt needing his cash flow, they just need to have a staring contest with him.

Trouble is, I think Matt’s rather good at staring.


Not on Joe’s watch!

Bert and Joe square up to each other over Joe being asked to judge the veg at the flower and produce show.

Bert just won’t let it go, but Joe’s adamant that his experience, and fair approach, will make this a show to remember – with no dodgy decisions.

“there won’t be no undeserving winner”

Good oh. But either way, Bert will need DNA proof of that before he’ll be satisfied.