Monday 21 March 2011

The Archers Sun 20th Mar 2011: Kenton has his best jeans on

  • “Look Dad, proper napkins and everything!”
  • Joe at the book club?
  • Excuse me Eddie - ‘pronto’?
  • Plan C
  • Leonie’s coming next month
  • Jamie shouts at Kenton
  • Jamie shouts near Fallon



“Look Dad, proper napkins and everything!”

Eddie makes it sound like Clarrie makes them eat out of takeaway boxes …

After having conned Lynda into agreeing that he and Joe could have Sunday lunch with her and Robert (as Clarrie was working – real reason that they want to avoid the Lent meal of cheese and bread), Eddie’[s well chuffed with himself.

But it doesn’t last for long.

For starters – Lynda has had to work. Which is Elizabeth’s fault for having to ‘borrow; Roy, leaving Grey Gables’ rota in tatters.

So, it’s Robert cooking. Quite bizarrely – he seemingly looks like a boxer in his cooking mitts …

First Robert brings out the brown rice.

[Joe] “Curry for Sunday dinner, that ain’t right”

Then he brings out the puy lentils (which is seemingly naughty, and Lynda musn't be told)

Numpties didn’t check whether Lynda and Robert were also doing this non-Sunday lunch for lent!

[Joe] “Eh, got any brown sauce?”



Joe at the book club?

Robert happened to mention that Lynda will miss the first meeting of Usha’s book club (due to the new rota, again), and that explained it’s a discussion group with nibbles and wine.

Joe sounded very interested at that point.

Here’s hoping he does join, and the next book is the Vagina Monologues!



Excuse me Eddie - ‘pronto’?

Now Eddie may have been severely disappointed about Robert’s Sunday Lunch, but there was nae need to be that rude to Fallon.

We all know what happens to your food in the kitchen you’re rude to waiting folks …

[Eddie] “Two portions of pasties and chips, pronto … check with Freda, it’s an emergency!”

[Joe] “I can still taste that boiled rice”

[Eddie] “All that chewing Robert made us do to make us ‘appreciate it’”

But then – foiled again!

Robert walks into The Bull, just as Fallon has headed off ‘pronto’ like to check Eddie and Joe can have their food.

Ha!

Serves you right chaps. A bit of common courtesy wouldn’t have gone amiss


Plan C

[Eddie] “We’ve got to get our hands on the means of production”

Which means they’ll try and get Clarrie invited elsewhere, so that they can cook their own Sunday lunch.

I have to say that I am losing my patience with Eddie and Joe this time.

Clarrie never gets taken anywhere – but they’ll ‘get rid’ of her to suit their own needs.

They then decide that they can pass Clarrie off onto Emma – despite the fact that Emma and Clarrie are barley being civil to each other, and Emma is heavily pregnant.

Eddie’s right that Emma isn’t incapacitated, but guests are guests – and we all know that a mother-in-law visit means – lots of tidying!

The tight-fisted numpties won’t even just simp0ly pop out to The Bull to buy their own Sunday lunch. They have to go about it in a way which inconveniences everyone around them

Surely they must come a proper cropper? Clarrie will find out – and all of their shenanigans aren’t exactly in the spirit of Lent

[Robert] “It’s quite humbly to feel some solidarity with the hungry”

Humble pie, Eddie and Joe?


Leonie’s coming next month

And Robert is quite relieved that she had a new boyfriend called Jay.

[Robert] “A dose of happiness will bring out her amenable side …”

Here’s hoping.

Though Eddie did mention that Jay sounded “like a bird”.

I get it, but I also wonder …


Jamie shouts at Kenton

[Jamie] “You got your best jeans on .. you’re going on a date, aren’t you … with my stepmum … I saw you getting with her last Thursday”

[Kenton] “It’s not a causal thing,. It’s a proper relationship”

[Jamie] “You just can’t help sleeping around!”

[Kenton] “What has happened with Jolene is for real”

[Jamie] “Like it was for real with my mum! You’re such a loser!”

If only Kenton had learned his lesson from the last time, and told Jamie before he found it by seeing him in flagrante.

I reckon Jamie does have a right to be angry and confused.

His mum’s ex. With his dead dad’s wife.

Ouch.



Jamie shouts near Fallon

Thank goodness Jamie does have Fallon, and seems to listen to her.

[Jamie] “So how come that slime ball is down there?”

(on finding out that Fallon already knew about Kenton and Jolene – and that they wanted to keep everything quiet)

[Jamie] “Why does nobody tells me things. It’s like I’m invisible or something … I’m not people!”

[Fallon] “It was a real shock to me an all, if that helps … what I’ve tried to come to terms with is my mum moving on, from your dad … I still can’t honestly get my head round it”

[Jamie] “It’s gross”

[Fallon] “But they do seem genuinely happy together”

[Jamie, sarcastically] “Oh well, As long as Kenton’s happy”

[Fallon] “I know he’s hurt you … I think he’s genuinely sorry”

[Jamie] “Sorry he’s been found out! …who cares anyway …”

[Fallon] “My mum’s dead choosy, you know … I know my mum wouldn’t want you to be upset”

[Jamie] “Well, she better look out, that’s all. He double crossed my mum and will do the same to yours …”

[Fallon] “What do you mean, double crossed?”

[Jamie] “He had this woman, he picked her up in Jaxx, Holly, who was like this real slag … it was the breaking point for my mum … I best Holly wasn’t the only one …”

Choosing not to hear anymore, Fallon suggests they watch their DVD.

But job done, Jamie..

Telling Fallon about Holly will make Fallon more suspicious – and she’s bound to eventually tell Jolene, or accuse Kenton of something he hasn’t even done.

There’s a Jamie sized wedge about to get between Kenton and Jolene, methinks.

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