- Jennifer and Phoebe return home
- Lynda’s canvassing
- Matt’s not pleased about a whole two nights of James
- The Big Five
- Brian sucks up
- James really is a prat
- What’s James’ “development”
Jennifer and Phoebe return home
And not a hint of any Kate-tastrophe (sorry!).
They’re both knackered after the journey back, but Phoebe is very excited about her trip. Especially the safari in the Kruger national park
[Phoebe] “It was really awesome … we stayed in a lodge, right out in the bush”
So all went well?
Maybe.
We’ll just have to see what slowly is brought to light over the next few days … weeks … months … years …
Lynda’s canvassing
Lynda catches Jennifer and Brian as Jennifer arrives home, but is left to speak with Brian. Jennifer pleads knackeredness.
She has her Parish Elections leaflet to share … but her stopping to give her leaflet to Brian should not be mistaken for canvassing.
[Lynda] “No, no , no … not canvassing. What Richard Thwaite’s been doing, that’s canvassing. Going round the village, knocking on doors, invading people’s privacy, it’s a sign of desperation if you ask me, he’ll probably lose more votes than he gains”
Hmmmm
[Lynda] “Hilary Noakes … went to the Easter Dawn service yesterday, first time ever, and to the breakfast after … smiling, chatting away, shamelessly ingratiating herself. Exactly who she’s trying to fool I don’t know … and apparently she was all over Sabrina in the bull last night, shedding those crocodile tears …”
(seemingly Sabrina was upset that her question wasn’t chosen at Gardeners’ Question Time, and she’s furious with Joe, after hearing the truth about his mistletoe scam.
[Lynda] “Do you think Hilary gives a hoot about all that. It’s sheer hypocrisy. And as I said to Sabrina myself, that’s showbusiness!”
Brian really couldn’t a word in. Which was probably his tactic. Keep quiet, and hope it all stops soon …
Matt’s not pleased about a whole two nights of James
Matt really isn’t pleased. Really isn’t pleased, at all. He reckons it was difficult enough last time, so really doesn’t want James for 2 minutes, let alone 2 nights.
Lilian thinks the problem is that Matt and James are too similar to get on.
And Matt does promise to do his best.
That’s a relief! All should be well. Matt does always keeps his promises. Doesn’t he?
The Big Five
Elephant, buffalo, white rhino, lion, leopard – all of which Phoebe saw in South Africa, and has pictures of on her phone.
In fact, she has tonnes of pictures on her phone to show.
Oh joys!
Brian sucks up
[Brian] “I’d forgotten how difficult this childcare is … you’re so good at it”
Which sounded slightly genuine. Until he then admits that he hasn’t done the laundry.
[Brian] “I couldn’t find the detergent stuff. We must have run out …”
So, he hasn’t dealt with the dirty clothes, and he hasn’t got anything in for Jennifer to use on her holiday clothes.
Which, of course, Jennifer wants to get stuck into.
So poor tired Jennifer heads off to the Village Shop for laundry detergent.
Some things don’t change.
James really is a prat
James arrives home to Lilian.
And manages to be annoying with his first few utterances.
He reckons his car is a “beast”. He calls Lilian “ma” (ugh!). Then he boasts about speeding. Which Matt doesn’t like:
[Matt] “These days, I stick to the rules. A law abiding citizen”
(aye Matt – only after you tried to kill yourself and Lilian by speeding, then ended up in Prison. Law abiding citizen, but only because you were caught in the first place …)
[James] “Your car’s an extension of your personality. It says a lot about who you are, your status … remember, you’re the sole director of what’s on the way to becoming a very successful property business”
Prat.
He’s trying to annoy Matt, at the same time pretending that he gives a second thought to Lilian’s life. Which he never does.
But not to fear. Our Matt knows how to take chaps like him a peg down.
He just asks James to explain what his job – what a Management Consultant – actually is …
[Lilian] “I said you needn’t be worried. He’s been perfectly polite and charming”
[Matt] “Yeah, right, I’m sure it’s going to be a real fun couple of days”
Think Lilian will ever notice that her son is an utter prat?
What’s James’ “development”
[James] “There has been a development in my social life recently … it has become a lot more, interesting …”
Which gets Lilian very excited!
Could it be a girlfriend? THE one?
Or has James just got himself a hamster?
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