- There’s no website, no piggy football and no comments section
- Sexist or true enough?
- Elona moves in
- Tom advocates violence against Helen
- Tony might tip his soup
- Pat and Tony on Kylie’s return
- Brenda’s allowed to the meeting
- A whole pub full of Horrobins
There’s no website, no piggy football and no comments section
Tom’s lost the plot.
He reckons he has pigs playing football online. A website showing the video. And a comments section where folks are debating:
[Tom] “Was the little pig offside when he took the pass?”
No Tom. You’ve made it all up.
Unless someone can find it – it’s either not there, or I’ve been blocked …
Sexist or true enough?
Brenda said to Tom:
[Tom] “Okay, I know you’ll never understand the offside rule, but it’s life or death to some people”
Now – first reaction is that Tom is a sexist prig.
But, think about it, and he’s probably right.
I wouldn’t have though Busty Brenda would be much of a footy fan, let alone have the capacity to follow the offside rule being explained with the aid of a few cans of beer and a bottle of tomato sauce …
Elona moves in
To No.3 next door to Tom and Brenda.
They both say hello, Tom asks whether they have a motorbike (oh hardy har), to wish Elona promises they’ll be quiet.
[Brenda] “Ah, she’s sweet … she’s really nice, I’m so pleased she’s moving in”
I wonder if Elona feels the same.
Or whether she’s a bit annoyed she’s discovered her neighbours are to be an arrogant w**ker and a rather dense busty blonde.
(Brenda is blonde, isn’t she? I’ve always seen her that way. Just like Adam has hair redder than a fire engine)
Tom advocates violence against Helen
Tom to Brenda:
[Tom] “Don’t take any rubbish from Helen. If she steps out of line, just stamp on her”
Steady on!
Mind you, I’ve puts odds on Helen in a punch-up with Brenda.
Tony might tip his soup
Seems the phrase ‘Peggy’s birthday’ can’t be uttered when Tony is around. But Pat is getting fed up of him insisting that he can’t be sat next to Jennifer at the lunch:
[Pat] “So you’ll do what? Make a scene? Tip your soup on the floor?!?”
[Tony] “I can’t answer for the consequences …”
I just hope Grey Gables isn’t serving trifle that day.
Pat and Tony on Kylie’s return
Pat reckons she’ll be really interested to meet Kylie. Though Tony doesn’t hold much hope for her being a decent person – he was as unamused with Sharon as he is with Clive.
[Pat] “She (Kylie) and John got on well too … he was really fond of her … I have to say I’m glad Sharon’s not coming down”
And they’ve put Hayley’s mind at rest that Sharon isn’t coming to the funeral.
That was a bit of a web, wasn’t it?
Brenda’s allowed to the meeting
To talk about the Ambridge Organics brand.
Tom is still being a twit about them not using Tom Archer’s (now there’s a surprise). He reckons they’ve turned down the “hottest brand in Ambridge and gone for something watered down”.
Ach – just shush up there now, will you Tom.
Funny thing though – Pat tells Tom that they had a customer phoning them saying how much they live the piggy footy, and that they’re likely to order again.
So – Tom’s pigs are creating more custom for Bridge Farm!
Take that, you insufferable little man.
Anyhoo – point of the meeting was to talk about the rebranding and relaunch of Bridge Farm as Ambridge Organics. Brenda has a contact who can advise, so it’s full steam ahead.
Nice to hear Tony and Pat feeling positive about something. Especially as it’s doing it their way, not Tom’s way.
A whole pub full of Horrobins
Is Tony’s idea of hell.
He’s not looking forward to the funeral. Obviously because it’s a funeral, but mainly because it involves a gathering of Horrobins.
[Tony] “A whole pub full of Horrobins, all that emotions and alcohol slaushing about … it’d be like sticking half a dozen ferrets in a sack. There will be fur flying by the end of it.”
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