Tuesday, 30 April 2013

Nic and Will are expecting: Fri 12.04.13 #thearchers

Pondering The Archers Friday 12th April 2013
  • Clarrie enjoyed last night’s WI talk
  • Eddie would have washed his jeans, but …
  • Was Sabrina a ferret?
  • Sheep shall be sheared, Jazzer and Ed style
  • Jazzer’s spotted something’s amiss with Tom
  • Nic and Will are pregnant
  • Pat and Tony really hate Brian
  • Spring has Sprung for Helen
  • Tom isn’t good enough for Pat and Tony

Clarrie enjoyed last night’s WI talk

[Clarrie] “Much better than travels with me trumpet!”

Eddie would have washed his jeans, but …

[Eddie] “I would have washed them mesel if you’d have waited Clarrie.”

[Clarrie] “Course …”

Wonder if Eddie even knows where the washing machine is!?!

Was Sabrina a ferret?

Nagging at Eddie about fussing about with her ferrets, Clarrie softens when she’s asked to hold Adele:

[Clarrie] “Got to admit I quite like this one.”

Seems Eddie is taking Adele to Fat Pauls to, ahem, ‘meet’ one of his male ferrets.

Eddie reckons it has to be done now, as he reckons ferrets get sick if they don’t mate at the right time. Clarrie reckons that’s just an old wives’ tale.

[Clarrie] “I wonder if Sabrina was a ferret at a former life?”

(what? Where did that come from?!? Clarrie really doesn’t seem to be herself at the moment …)

Sheep shall be sheared, Jazzer and Ed style

Ed and Jazzer have bought all the equipment they need to start shearing, though it isn’t exactly of cutting edge technology.

Now, they just need a truck. Which a mate of a mate reckons he could sell them. Jazzer shows Tony a photo of it.

[Tony] “It’s quite garish.”

[Jazzer] “Flame red. Top colour … all we (then) need is a few dopey sheep to practise on. Do you need a haircut?”

[Tony] “I can’t afford to lose anymore!”

Jazzer’s spotted something’s amiss with Tom

Jazzer was telling Tony that Tom isn’t “great company” at the moment.

[Jazzer] “Racing round like a bampot. Cannae get a word out of him, but he’s doing the word of 10 men.”

Which means Jazzer has more time for a cigarette and a chat.

Poor Tom. He’s spent so many years riding roughshod over everyone else’s feelings that no-one has noticed his heart is breaking.

Nic and Will are pregnant

Nic and Will have popped over, unexpectedly, so see Clarrie and Ed. They need to speak “family business”. Quite literally …

[Eddie] “Have you won the lottery?”

[Will] “Well, not quite.”

Clarrie’s flustered to see them, unannounced:

[Clarrie] “Why didn’t you tell me? We don’t have a biscuit left in the house!”

They shush her about the biscuits.

[Nic] “We’re going to have a baby!”

Though stunned, Clarrie and Eddie are over the moon. The baby is due in 13 weeks.

[Nic] “As long as it’s healthy, and no complications …”

(reference to Bethany there, by any chance?)

[Clarrie, still obsessing about biscuit] “Why did you and Joe have to eat all the fig rolls?”

[Eddie] “Well, if we’d known …”

Once Will and Nic leave, Clarrie’s shocked that she didn’t even spot that Nic was pregnant. She’s normally the first to guess – even before the mother. But, she was sure Nic didn’t want another one.

[Clarrie] “It’ll make the marriage that much stronger.”

And, it’ll mean more babysitting for the ever put-upon Clarrie.

[Eddie] “That serves you right, Clarrie, for marrying into such fertile stock!”

Well, we knew Nic and Will we’re trying, and since Will has calmed down into a rather decent human being, I can now heartily congratulate them.

Wonder if Ed and Emma will fell the same?

Pat and Tony really hate Brian

[Tony] “Tell her what you just told me.”

[Jazzer] “About the two rabbis and the priest?”

[Tony] “No. About Jim. Who do you think he’s interviewing next?”

Seems it’s Brian.

Jim claims it was Jennifer twisting his arm (and “several body parts”), but it was Jim’s idea, actually.

[Pat] “So much for shining alight on less well-known figures.”

[Tony] “You can imagine what Jennifer will be like.”

My word … Pat and Tony really can’t stand Brian. There’s also a bit of jealously there. They reckon it should be Tom.

[Pat] “Part of Borchester’s future, not its past.”

But, Jazzer reckons Tom wouldn’t have made the best interviewee in his current state of mind.

[Jazzer] “He’d get more chat out of Greyfriar’s Bobby!”

Spring has Sprung for Helen

Seems Helen was a happy chappy after her first date with Jonathan.

[Tony] “Nice to see Helen with a bit of a spring in her step.”

And they’re going out again – a meal, for her birthday.

Crossing everything, in the hope this one actually works out for Helen.

Tom isn’t good enough for Pat and Tony

Pat and Tony are still confused that since they agreed with Tom to sell the herd, he hasn’t mentioned it.

[Tony] “I wonder if, perhaps he’s having a few doubts?”

[Pat] “Perhaps it’s finally hitting home what a big step it is for the farm … The moment he gets what he wants, a grudging thank you and stops talking to us all together!”

They both agree it’s not on.

[Pat] “What’s going on in that head of his?”

Well, again, it is Tom’s fault to an extent – but Pat’s normally not so blind to her kids having problems.

Seems she can’t see the son for the cows.

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