Thursday, 31 May 2012

Lynda offended by yellow 29.05.12

The Archers Tuesday 29th May 2012
  • Susan and Vicky talk Jubilee
  • The kids practice for the Jubilee
  • Maypole abused by Alf Grundy
  • Vicky wants to retire?
  • Amy thinks Carl wasn’t married
  • Alice bakes a cake
  • It’s Lynda’s birthday
  • The horror!

Susan and Vicky talk Jubilee

They seem to be cutting out pictures of The Queen as they’re working in the village shop:

[Vicky] “I can’t help thinking we’re missing a golden opportunity to put the phone box on the map”

[Susan] “A diamond opportunity!”

[Vicky] “My great aunt Nellie had a Welsh corgi, it used to sleep on the bed … Hey, how about we wrap it in Clingfilm, like that artist?””

[Susan] “It’s not a packed lunch Vicky, and how would people get in and out?”

[Vicky] “I’m just thinking outside the box”

[Susan] “We can use some of the decorations we used when Camilla visited”

[Vicky] “Oh come on, we want more pizazz than that!”

Ah bless them and their idle chatter.

The kids practice for the Jubilee

[Vicky] “That tunes getting on my wick”

Vicky is not amused by Lynda and the Village kids (not people, mind) constantly practising their Jubilee maypole dancing. Mainly because they’re doing so on the village green, which the village shops faces onto. As it’s too hot to close their door, Vicky has to suffer hearing their maypole music over and over and over …

Lynda also doesn’t seem to be having much luck with the kids getting any better.

[Lynda] “Lift your knees everyone, I want skippity skip, not clumpty clump … what an unfit bunch …”

Seems that Tracey’s Brad is causing particular mayhem:

[Lynda] “Brad, he’s an anarchist … if he frightens Molly Button with his rat again on Sunday, he’s not getting his jubilee commemoration mug”

Brad will be devastated, I’m sure. Lynda tells us that she still treasurers her Coronation mug. In has “pride of place in our downstairs loo”.

Maypole abused by Alf Grundy

[Susan] “Alf Grundy set light when he was young, apparently. Went up like a giant cigar, Eddie said”

Vicky wants to retire?

What’s Vicky most looking forward to during the Jubilee?

[Vicky] “The best thing is having such a long time off work”

She then later mentioned that she was finding the drive to and from Felpersham twice a week for work a bit if a frustration. She reckons it “upsets her rhythm”.

Sounds like someone does want to work anymore …

Amy thinks Carl wasn’t married

Amy’s on about Usha to Alice yet again. But is at least now looking at flats in Felpersham. Alongside ending the constant bickering, it’s also time Amy moved up and out.

Amy is also starting to question whether Usha was right about Carl. She thinks that Alan brought her up to be a good judge of character.

[Amy] “The more I think about it, I've been given second hand information. I don’t think he’s married at all”

Ach, that girl is just silly.

[Amy] “It may be a marriage of convenience … they must have fallen out of love for hi, to behave the way he did for me ... maybe he stayed out of loyalty, or just for show …what do you think?”

[Alice] “I think I don’t want you hurt”

She thinks Usha has an agenda. Though what Usha would gain from Amy going out with a married man is anyone’s guess.

Alice bakes a cake

For Brian and Jennifer’s 36th wedding anniversary.

[Alice] “Mum and dad have been through some dodgy times but hey, they belong together”

And she’ll be making one of the sponges for the giant WI jubilee cake.

It’s Lynda’s birthday

She got a new straw hat. Robert’s taking her out for a meal. And Christine invites her round for tea and a scone.

The horror!

Lynda’s pleasantly surprised by the effort Adam and Ian have made with their garden for Britain in Bloom.

[Lynda] “Oh they’ve done spectacularly well to create a cottage garden from a  standing start.”

[Christine] “Curtosey of the garden centre … Adam found it very therapeutic”

Lynda I also very impressed by Jim’s experiment – he’s grown vegetables in with his plants (chard, beetroot, and globe artichokes to be exact).

Then, Lynda, Christine and Jim walk up to No. 8 Glebeland.

[Lynda] “How could they possibly do such a thing … yellow!”

[Christine] “A whole garden thrugh of them”

[Lynda] “This is appalling, They’ve driven a coach and horses through the red white and blue motif”

[Christine] “I don’t know who lives here … I think they’re commuters … do you think they’re republicans … really Jim, I don’t think you realised just how upset she as going to be”

[Jim] “Plating yellow flowers is hardly a capital offense … Britain has a fine tradition of disobedience. It keeps our democracy alive, my dear”

[Christine] “Don’t you ‘my dear’ me. I’d rather have the queen as head of state any date over some sleazy politician!”

[Jim] “A democratically elected sleazy politician …”

[Christine] “I think I’ll head back. I don’t like to miss the news”

[Jim] “Oops …”

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