Thursday, 28 February 2013

Susan picks on Jennifer: Mon 25.02.13 #thearchers

The Archer Monday 25th February 2012
  • Susan’s not amused with Jennifer
  • Concrete costs too much
  • Ed’s happy with his lot
  • It is a T20
  • Emma thinks of someone else

Susan’s not amused with Jennifer

Jennifer’s bought a few things at the village shop.

Then has the audacity to ask Susan for a few bags to put them in.

[Susan, in a rather terse tone] “Don’t you usually bring your own shopping bags Jennifer?”

Well yes, but Jennifer’s left them in the car by mistake. There’s no need to get upset …

Jennifer then spots fresh curly kale that Bert’s brought in.

[Susan] “No one knows what to do with it, apart from boil it like cabbage.”

Actually, Jennifer does. She fries her with garlic and chilli. Alice also does. She puts it in curry.

Susan is not impressed.

Jennifer asks if Home Décor magazine is in. But it isn’t. So she mentions she’ll just get her copy in Felpersham. To which Susan is offended:

[Susan] “Keep things local, that’s what I say.”

[Jennifer] “Actually I do support local businesses.”

She’s had Darrell over to quote for decorating work.

[Susan] “Lucky you, than to have nothing more on your mind than a bit of painting and decorating!”


As Jennifer leaves the shop, her plastic bags split. Smashing the eggs she’s just bought.

[Susan] “I’m sorry, I'm going to have to charge you for another box of eggs.”

[Jennifer] “Of course.”

Jennifer’s had enough:

[Jennifer] “Susan, well I know you’re angry and upset …”

[Susan] “Me?”

[Jennifer] “Look, please don’t take it out on me.”

[Susan] “I'm not.”

(is Susan completely oblivious?)

[Jennifer] “Well yes you are, actually, You're being very offhand.”

[Susan] “So might you be. It’s not my son dragging your slaughter thousands of miles to live, is it … And you might be happy to let it happen, but if the boot had been on the other foot, I’d have given Christopher a proper talking to.”

[Jennifer] “I don’t want them to go any more than you do. I absolutely hate the idea.”

Which stops Susan in her tracks. She had assumed Jennifer would be happy about Alice wanting to go to Canada, as she’s used to her children moving far away. What’s more:

[Susan] “I know you always think our Christopher is holding Alice back.”

[Jennifer] “I don’t, well not anymore.”

Wow! What a difference in Jennifer’s attitude since Alice and Chris got married.

Jennifer tells Susan she and Brian are very “fond” of Chris, and proud of both him and Alice. She also sees Alice as her baby, who she doesn’t want to move thousands of miles away.

In fact, she doesn’t want any of her children so far away.

[Jennifer] “I can’t understand, for the life of me, why they all feel they have to live abroad.”

(um … what about Adam? Doesn’t he count???)

[Susan] “I'm really sorry I was off with you Jennifer. I had no idea you felt the same as me.”

[Jennifer] “I do. But there’s nothing either of us can do to make Alice change her mind.”

Concrete costs too much

So Ed’s using bits of brick and rubble to fill the hole round a post.

Ed’s happy with his lot

Emma’s horrified at the thought Alice wants to go anywhere other than Ambridge.

[Emma] “Going somewhere where you don’t know anyone … must be really hard, making new friends in a city … don’t go getting any ideas.”

[Ed] “As if. I’ve got everything and everyone I want right here.”


It is a T20

Ed and Jazzer are off to look at the tractor the nice, old widow has stashed in her garage.

If it proves to be a profitable purchase, they’ll have their money to setup their sheep shearing business. Of which Emma has high hopes. She’s already planning that the extra money will help them get their own home again.

No pressure there for Ed, then …

Anhyoo – when they go to see the tractor, it is indeed a Ferguson T20. (which is seemingly a very good thing). Ed’s also feeling a bit less guilty about even thinking of buying it from a poor, but nice, widow.

[Ed] “And she does seem happy to get shot of it.”

As they have a proper look at it, they start to realise that though it looks like jink, it’s actually in good working order.

It has fuel and oil in it. The tyres are fine. And, it even starts up first try.

[Ed] “It’s like he kept it in working order, but not much restoring.”

[Jazzer] “Husbands that are made redundant or pensioned off … the moment he finished and got the tractor going I would have been curtains to his peaceful afternoons, away from her indoors constant blethering.”

Ed mentions he never ceases to be amazed at Jazzer (and his insights).

[Jazzer] “I’ve got hidden shallows mate.”

So – the tractor is actually worth a fair few bob, with a bit of TLC on its outside.


[Ed] “Now that we’ve actually seen it, it definitely doesn’t feel right.”

Jazzer is insistent they only pay a few hundred for the tractor. But, even in its current state, it’s worth more than that.

[Jazzer] “What she disnae know won’t hurt her.”

[Ed] “I’ll know. I;m really not happy with it … I’m just not happy about tricking her like this. I need to sleep on it.”

Thank goodness Ed’s functioning as Jazzer’s conscience. Seems someone needs to.

Emma thinks of someone else


It’s Neil and Susan’s anniversary today, though neither have mentioned it or organised any wee treat (one would assume because of their worry over Chris).

But, Emma’s made a surprise for them.

She’s got them dinner ready (even a trifle!), laid the table in a romantic type way. Is taking her, Ed and the kids over to Clarrie’s so Neil and Susan can have some peace. And has even sent Neil up for a shower!

[Emma] “Why don’t you put your worries to one side, eh mum. Just for tonight … Think about yourselves for once.”


I’m liking this new Emma.


caroline_venezia said...

Wasn't Adam in Africa for years? I seem to remember not even knowing he existed until he came back!

Inga McVicar said...

Yes - Adam was away for a long time. Remember he was dreamikng of Africa just before he has his afdair with that Pavel chap?

caroline_venezia said...

Oh yes, I'd forgotten about that - I suppose he was starting to get itchy feet again, before being reminded of all he has now & could have lost.