Friday, 10 May 2013

The Brookfield kids want money – Fri 10.05.13 #thearchers

Pondering The Archers Friday 10th May 2013
  • Josh wants to graze chickens
  • Poor Number 27
  • Topical mention!
  • Jill and David do the weeding
  • What’s the gossip from Lower Loxley?
  • The darts team have a saint
  • Pip still wants a better car

Josh wants to graze chickens

Today is the day Josh pitches his egg idea to David and Ruth, to try and get their investment.

[Josh] “I hope we can do it before supper, I’ll be too nervous to eat.”


At least Phoebe has no end of belief in him. As, actually, does both David and Ruth. They’re visibly bursting with pride (so I assume!)

[Eddie] “Blimey, he’s starting early.”

[Ruth] “We just need to be sure he’s not trying to run before he can walk.”

After Josh has made his pitch:

[Ruth] “This is really impressive.”

[David] “But Josh, it is still a lot of work.”

Josh reckons he can manage. He’s gone through the financials with Neil. And has proved that he can work the hens while still doing his homework and helping at Brookfield. He reckons he can cope with the additional work being a partner would entail.

[Josh] “I’m prepared to devote all of my free time to this … I've got so many ideas.”

And so he has.

Seems he’s been looking on what free-range genuinely looks like (not just thousands of hens in a massive barn, with the door open). He reckons if he gives them access to pasture, the eggs will be nutritious. And it’ll be a unique selling point.

[Josh] “In the long term, I want to look at managing their grassland pasture, just like we do with the cows … moving them from one area to another so that they get access to fresh grass, not just mud and earth … then I can put that in my promotional literature. Not just free range, but free range on pasture.”

[David] “That’s a good slogan.”

[Ruth] “That’s really innovative.”

[David] “I'm really impressed that you made that connection for your hens.”

[Josh] “My hens? So you’d be prepared to back me?”

Josh needs £500 from David and Ruth to join with his £700.

[David] “Well, that seems like a fair price.”

AND Josh wants them only to lend it to him. He’s already worked out an instalment plan, that he reckons will only take him 2 years to complete.

[Josh] “If my plans work, and I get more customers for my eggs, it could be sooner than that.”

[David] “I think you’ve put forward a very good business case, but your mum and I do need to talk it over between ourselves.”

After Josh leaves them.

[Ruth] “I wish I’d been that together when I was 15.”

[David] “Absolutely. We seem to have given birth to the next Alan Sugar” … It’s a serious proposition, and he’s willing to put the work into it.”

But, ever cautious, Ruth is worried that Josh will be putting all of his savings onto the hens.

[David] “All his eggs in one basket, as it were.”


[David] “At least he’s prepared to put his money where his mouth is.”

Well, and their money …

Poor Number 27

Suspected of having TB, might have to be left behind when the rest of her pals are sold, and now she has to have her milk kept separate.

Insult upon insult.

Topical mention!

[Eddie] “Looking forward to tomorrow’s match … the cup final … I thought you were the football fan around here?”

But Josh is too distracted about his pitch to care.

And well done Eddie on noticing something outside of Ambridge!

Jill and David do the weeding

While having a good natter, and Jill wonders while Josh isn’t doing it (seems it’s his usual job).

[David] “He’s going for young businessman of the year, he’s far too grand to do weeding.”

[Jill] “You must be proud of your children at the moment, with Pip getting this placement in Yorkshire … it’s a good one.”

[David, obviously still furious] “It’s better than she deserves.”

[Jill] “Young people go through these rebellious phrases. All of you did … and you all came good in the end.”

[David] “Even Kenton.”

[Jill] “David!”

Seems they’re weeding the veg allotment.

(I always think it strange that a farm can have an allotment. Surely allotments are just or urban types)

They’ve been at it a while, and Jill needs a wee break.

[Jill] “I used to think it odd of your father to put a bench in the vegetable garden … but over the years, I’ve come to see the sense of it.”

 Ah that Phil. He knew a thing or two.

What’s the gossip from Lower Loxley?

They’re getting quotes in for the dairy conversion.

And English Wine week is coming up soon.

Crack open the Lower Loxley wine!

The darts team have a saint

[David] “Is there a patron saint of cricketers?”

[Jill] “I’m sure they could find one. Kenton’s found one for the darts team.”

[David] “What, a saint who played darts?”

[Jill] “Not exactly. Saint Sebastian was martyred by being pierced with arrows.”

[David] “Only Kenton could have come up with that!”

[Jill] “I think it’s quite a good idea. He’s looking for someone for the skittles team now.”

Pip still wants a better car

When Pip gets home from Uni, she’s already on the defensive.

[Ruth] “Good day at Uni?”

[Pip] “I suppose you mean did I get in those assignments that I had to retake in on time?”

(Calm down!)

Pip claims she’s going to a revision class tomorrow, “even though it’s a Saturday”. (diddum) For that, she wants the Land Rover. But, David needs it for the farm.

Queue Pip throwing a tantrum …

[Pip] “You said it was a good idea for me to go to this class!”

[David] “Yeah, but I’m not the one who crashed your car, am I?!?”

Ruth tries to make the peace by offering to take Pip to Hollerton to catch the train. When Pip pushes her luck, and asks Ruth to take her the whole way, David shouts a very loud, angry “no!”.

[Pip] “This is getting ridiculous.”

Pip reckons she’s found at least two cars, but they’re more expensive than the insurance pay-out she’ll be getting.

[David, thick with sarcasm] “What a pity.”

[Pip] “Dad, I need you at least to lend me the money.”

She reckons she needs at least £800 to add to the insurance money.

[David] “No, No! There must be cheaper cars out there. Look, Pip, you have been earning very good money, and instead of saving it, you have chosen to spend it all on holidays, and going out,. And this is the consequence, isn’t it. If you can’t afford the car, you’ll just have to find yourself a cheaper one. And that’s that!”

Yup, Josh is definitely the favoured child at the moment. It’s not hard to see why.

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