Tuesday, 11 June 2013

Clarrie gets all angry over flowers – Tues 11.06.13 #thearchers

Pondering The Archers Tuesday 11th June 2013
  • Do guinea pigs have souls?
  • At least Elona left the oven gloves
  • Clarrie was not a fan of Zebedee
  • Will the well to do of Ambridge not save the organ?
  • The Darts Team to watch a Derek Jarman?
  • Clarrie’s furious about the Virgin Mary

Do guinea pigs have souls?

George is wondering.

He’s worried that you can’t get into heaven if you haven’t got soul. Which could spell disaster for his guinea pig Mitch.

[Neil]  “Possibly. I couldn’t say so … I think we need to go inside and get you some breakfast.”

Well swerved, Neil.

But I don’t think it’s going to end there.

At least Elona left the oven gloves

That’ll make it all okay for Darrell.

She’s leaving today.

She’s worried he won’t eat properly. He’s worried about not seeing his girls every day.

(there’s a lot of worry in Ambridge today)

[Darrell] “Are you this is what you want, love?”

[Elona] “It’s hard for me too.”

[Darrell] “Well, why can’t we just …”

[Elona] “No, we can’t go back.”

Poor Darrell.

He thinks he can persuade Elona to stay by saying he’ll change. Absolutely will. This time. Unlike all the other times …

[Darrell] “I still love ya.”

With impeccable timing, Neil happens by.

He starts waffling on about Emma starting at Peggy’s, so he’s taking Keira off to Tracey’s.

Elona tells him to tell Emma that Peggy prefers hot, not cold, milk in her tea.

(hark m’lady!)

Finally realising he probably shouldn’t be there at that very moment, Neil wishes Elona well, offers to buy Darrell a pint and gets on his way.

[Darrell] “Well that’s it then.”

Later at the pub, Darrell explains how he and Elona got married and fell pregnant more or less straight after first meeting.

[Darrell] “When you realise when you want to spend the rest of your life with someone, you want to start the rest if your life straight away.”

But, Darrell reckoning him being Darrell has ruined everything.

[Neil] “You’ve had a run of bad luck, that’s all.”

[Darrell]”I failed them through my own stupidity … Elona's lost all respect for me, and now I’ve lost her and the girls.”

Well … I would have said Darrell was a useless but harmless chap before the dog fighting. But, since he helped the dog fighting ring, I reckon he deserves every last bit of bad luck going.

(Harsh? Think of what those dogs suffered).

Clarrie was not a fan of Zebedee

[Clarrie] “Zebedee was a miserable old so and so.”

(told you!)

Will the well to do of Ambridge not save the organ?

Seems Clarrie’s not just down on Zebedee. She’s annoyed that it’s his far distant relatives in Canada who give a hoot, rather than the rich locals.

[Clarrie] “Well, I wish them with deep pockets closer to home would help out.”

She reckons those that appear in the society pages of Borchester Life should be donating to St Stephen’s organ fund.

(actually, how much has Brian donated?)

The Darts Team to watch a Derek Jarman?

Seems Clarrie is helping the darts team with their display for the Flower Festival.

[Clarrie] “I’m trying to steer them away from blood and gore …”

[Jim] “Have you ever seen Derek Jarman’s film about Saint Sebastian?”

[Clarrie] “Oh, might it help give them ideas?”

[Jim] “Yes, but not ones pertinent to a Flower Festival. Anyway, it’s all in Latin …”

[Clarrie] “Oh, I can’t stand subtitles. I never know where to look!”

[Jim] “You’d be riveted to the action, both the dialogue, in that particular film.”

Cheeky Jim.

I can’t imagine the darts team would particularly enjoy watching Jarman’s particular brand of homoeroticism … still, maybe they would?

Clarrie’s furious about the Virgin Mary

Jim tells Clarrie that Christine’s Virgin Mary (in flowers) will be all white (flowers),

Clarrie’s horrified. She insists the Virgin Mary wore blue.

[Jim] “We’ll, she’ll not be wearing it to the Flower Festival.”

My word, Christine really doesn’t care for tradition sometimes.

Imagine the Virgin Mary, in white.



Seems Clarrie’s main issue with Christine’s plan is that she had been planning to use white lilies in her own display. Now that Christine is also doing white, Clarrie’s plans are in turmoil.

[Nic] “Maybe we should be the ones to give in.”

[Clarrie] “No, no, sorry, I got it all pictures in my head. I spent ages thinking it through.”

Clarrie’s plans for St Bridget were dairy maids and milk. Which is most definitely a white theme.

Grasping at straws, Nic tries to reassure that Jim might have got it wrong.

[Clarrie] “Jim’s her fancy man, ain't he. They do the crossword over breakfast, what does that tell you?”

(erm … I know what Clarrie means …but in Jim and Christine’s case, it means they just like doing the crossword over breakfast together)

[Clarrie] “Knowledge is power. We need a mole, if we can keep up with what Christine’s planning.”

Wow, this is serious.

I haven’t heard Clarrie so any in many a moon.

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