Sunday 26 August 2012

Lilian knows :Mon 27.08.12

The Archers Monday 27th August 2012
  • Matt should check the phone messages
  • Rhys and Harry wouldn’t be a good couple
  • Tug Fowler
  • Darrell dobs in Matt

Matt should check the phone messages

Especially when he’s up to something Lilian has already told him not to do.

Lilian checks the business phone after the weekend. It had 9 messages.

(I thought their business was setup in their house? If so, how could they not have heard that racket?)

All the messages are from Arthur.

They had a damp patch. Which became a leak. Which has now got into their cupboard. Even with the mains turned off, it’s still leaking.

Lilian calls Arthur back.

[Lilian] “How are things?”

[Arthur] “We have a leak, how do you expect things to be?”

Lilian asks if she can call Arthur by his first name rather than Mr Walter.

[Arthur] “You can call me Shirley, as long as you get it fixed.”

[Lilian] “Well don’t you worry, Sh … ahem … Arthur.”

(tee hee!)

So Lilian calls Darrell to go fix.


Rhys and Harry wouldn’t be a good couple


Harry’s due back on Wednesday to say goodbye, and collect his things. So Fallon is planning him a farewell party.

[Rhys] “You see, that’s why he and I could never be an item, apart from one or two other factors …”

[Fallon] “Like, you not being gay, you mean?”

[Rhys] “Thing is, he’s a lark and I’m a night owl. Being a bar man suits my body clock.”

Fair enough.


Tug Fowler

Is who Fallon wants to pay a small fortune to come and do a comedy set at The Bull.

Seems he’s an up and coming comedian Fallon and Kirsty saw at The Fringe. Fallon thinks he’d be perfect for The Bull.

Rhys reckons not so. After all, Fallon and Kirsty saw this comedian at midnight, after a few drinks.

[Rhys] “Later night on the Edinburgh Fringe, it’s a bit different from The Bull in Ambridge.”

[Fallon] “You know your trouble Rhys, you’re just happy just coasting along, I wanna push things forward”

[Rhys] “Yeah fair enough, push things forward, but you don’t want them falling over a cliff.”

Blimey, Fallon really is in a bad mood.

But Rhys isn’t helping.

What would he have to lose if Fallon gave something new a go?


Darrell dobs in Matt

When Darrell gets to Arthur and Joyce’s, it’s chaos.

The cupboard is flooded, so they’ve tried to save their things out of it, and dry them on the radiators. That includes photos. Letters from Arthur to Joyce when he was in the navy. And the stamp album Arthur was showing to Darrell the other day.

[Arthur] “Even out the heating on, in August, I ask you …”

But, the radiators are not warming up. Which gave Darrell a clue (not that he needed it. He’d set it up in the first place …)

The central heating pipe had split under one of the floorboards upstairs. Darrell fixes it within minutes.

[Arthur] “On a bank holiday too, I hope you get double bubble for that!”

Darrell can’t say sorry enough about all of their ruined things. And so he should. They Arthur and Joyce don’t know it, Darrell made this happen. On Matt’s say so.

As Darrell is leaving, Lilian calls.

[Lilian] “So, how did that happen then, you’re not going to tell me it was metal fatigue!”

Darrell reckons it was because the floorboard was loose, so was stressing the join as folks walked over it.

Lilian still isn’t convinced. She knows there’s something odd … especially considering she knows Matt wanted Arthur and Joyce out of that house.

[Darrell] “Well, it was, you know, all part of the job … that Matt had me doing there.”

[Lilian] “Oh, was it!”

Uh-oh!

Matt’s in trouble …

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