Tuesday, 3 July 2012

Judged by Britain in Bloom: Tues 03.07.12

The Archers Tuesday 3rd July 2012
  • After all that fuss …
  • Marcia fancies Joe?
  • Kenton wants you … but won’t say what for
  • Keira the Destroyer
  • Keith’s not a happy man
  • Ignorance is not sexy, Tracey

After all that fuss …

… it was a bit of a slow day in Ambridge.

Shame, really.

Marcia fancies Joe?

So, the great day has arrived.

After all that harassing and demanding, Lynda gets to present Ambridge to the Britain in Bloom judges.

One of who is called Marcia Greeve. The other Douglas (but Douglas doesn’t speak).

[Tracey] “Susan was polishing the veg for them … everyone’s gone bonkers””

It seems to all go fine. She and Jim do the honours.

Well, until Joe and Bartleby clip-clop by to catch Marcia’s eye …

Lynda disentangles them from Joe, only to find Jim steering the judges towards no. 8 The Green. Mind on that this was the only house to not follow the prescribed red, white and blue flower theme. They went yellow …


Marcia loved it.

[Marcia] “It’s gaudy, but not garish.”

Jim was beside himself with glee with Marcia said that! What a wicked boy he is to Lynda.
They moved onto the Community Orchard.

Where Joe’s waiting to give them a nip of his cider.

[Lynda, horrified] “Joe’s a real character isn’t he?”

[Marcia] “He’s a real sweetie.”

(if Joe wasn’t 90, and Marcia sounded in her 30s or 40s, I’d have thought we were about to have an Autumn romance)

After all was said and done:

[Jim] “I think that all went rather well.”

[Lynda] “Yes, yes I suppose so … apart from Joe hijacking.”

Though Jim thinks that Marcia liked Joe, and her taking to him was an advantage. Joe certainly thinks so:

[Joe] “Wouldn’t be surprised if I swung the result in our favour.”

Though Joe is more than aware that his ‘help’ wasn’t welcomed by Lynda:

[Joe] “… every time I appeared she tuned a funny colour /… me and Bartleby were more than a match for her!”

Kenton wants you … but won’t say what for

Seems Kenton’s posters for the sport bit of the Fete are up and about. They have a space for people to sign up to teams. But, the posters don’t mention what the teams will be doing.

Mind you, Lynda’s performance art sounds more worrying than anything Kenton might have planned.

Keira the Destroyer

Just as the judges are about to come to the Village Shop, Emma and Ed’s Keira starts rearranging it.

[Susan] “Good job I noticed what she did to that tub earlier”

(what? What did Keira do to the tub?!? We must be told)

As Lynda arrives at the shop with the judges, she’s trying to tell them about volunteering, when she’s drowned out by Keira’s crying.

Though it’s okay.

Marcia is distracted by the phone box and it’s lovely, lovely flowers.

Keith’s not a happy man

In fact, he sounds near suicidal.

He’s in Ambridge for a hair and make-up rehearsal at Susan’s before the wedding. Well, that’s something most men would turn pale at the thought of …

[Tracey] “You should see Chelsea. She’s like a bottle of pop!”

Better still. Hyper little girls.

It all sounded very raucous at Susan. Even Emma though it was too much – Tracey was supposed to be keeping them all calm:

[Emma] “It would be nice of Tracey lent a hand … doesn’t sound like she’s doing too good a job of it.”

Then Chelsea’s hamster got loose …

Keith eventually winds up in The Bull having a chat with Joe. He sounds beyond despondent.

[Keith] “This one’s costing me an arm and several legs … to be honest Joe; I don’t know how I’m going to do it.”


Sounds like this wedding is on the never ever (never!).

Ignorance is not sexy, Tracey

Tracey has been trying to make lamb samosas. Something to do with trying to win Ifty’s affections.

That’s so wrong, on so many levels, that I actually don’t want to discuss it.

(by the way – seems Ifty’s surname is Sha)

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