Monday, 29 July 2013

Helen reckons it was just a one-off – Mon 29.07.13 #thearchers

Pondering The Archers Monday 29th July 2013
  • It’s all Spanish to Oliver
  • Martin’s being a facetious bastard
  • Kirsty swaps the baby food for the gluten free
  • Helen’s not even bothered about the dust
  • Caroline pumps Lynda
  • Helen admits she slept with Rob

It’s all Spanish to Oliver

[Oliver] “You can’t start work until you’ve got the correct hair covering!”

Oliver’s trying to give instruction to one of their members of staff, a Spanish lady called Isabella.

He’s not doing very well – just talking slowly to her in English. So Lynda steps in.

[Lynda] “Hardly fluent, but one does one’s best.”

Actually, Lynda used an app.

How very now!

Oliver is most impressed indeed.

Martin’s being a facetious bastard

(my words, but it’s what Kathy would want to say)

Martin’s at the Gold Club bright and early. He’s even brought his laptop.

[Martin] “One of my most immediate worries is the general sloppiness I keep encountering.”

He reckons he keeps coming across the staff while they’re chatting to each other.

[Kathy] “It’s not a trapest monastery!”

To make matters worse, Martin had walked in while Kathy was on to phone to Oliver, trying to get him to give a health club voucher for the silent film night. She admits to the personal call, but that she did it on her mobile.

Martin’s then onto the restaurant takings being down. He wants to know what she’ll do about it.

Kathy tries to say the bad weather hasn’t helped matters.

[Martin] “I did not come her for a lecture on climate change.”

(and it’s actually been a cracker of a summer for all!)

Kathy then blames the recession, and that folks are going home to eat rather than eat at the Club.

(Aye, Kathy certainly isn’t helping her cause. Sounds like she’s just making excuses)

[Martin] “Has it occurred to you that it might be that they don’t like what you’re offering?”

He wants Kathy to be proactive. She should spot what’s wrong, and fix it.

[Martin] “You’ve done nothing about it.”

So, he wants her proposals for how to improve matters. The entire catering operation, by the end of this week.

(hear that whip cracking!)

Kirsty swaps the baby food for the gluten free

She fancied a change in Ambridge Organics.

Steady on, Kirsty.

Helen’s not even bothered about the dust

And she wasn’t remotely listening to Kirsty’s hilarious tales about her weekend, and Patrick’s fears about the silent film night.

[Kirsty] “The fear in his eyes when anyone mentions this film night!”

When Kirsty notices Helen isn’t listening:

[Kirsty] “Get your rubber gloves on girl and give me a hand, that’ll wake you up!”

Caroline pumps Lynda
[Caroline] “There’s only so much daytime television toy can watch without feeling your brain leaking out of your ears.”

She wants to know about Grey Gables.

Specifically, if got the recycled pencils arrived for the sustainability conference,

Lynda won’t be swayed.

[Lynda] “While I don’t wish to say, or imply, that you are dispensable, truly, I promise you, everything is running perfectly well.”

Which does seem to calm Caroline.

Oliver then joins the tea party.

[Lynda] “Oliver, if you’re there, and I;m here, who is in charge of Grey Gables ?”

Horrified that it’s someone called Justine, Lynda takes flight, back to the hotel.

Helen admits she slept with Rob

[Helen] “What I’m going to tell you, you’re not to tell a soul … I’ve just got to tell someone … something happened yesterday, and now I don’t know what to think.”

So, she tells Kirsty she was round at some guy’s house last night.

[Helen] “And we ended up in bed together.”

[Kirsty] “No, not you, surely? I mean, it’s not like you!”

[Helen] “No, it isn’t. That’s not all. The thing is, he’s married.”

[Kirsty] “What? But, you hadn’t said anything. Who is he? How long have you been seeing him? You have been seeing him, haven’t you?”

[Helen] “I don’t know … we haven’t been seeing each other, as such, well we have, it’s not like he’s a stranger, I know him, but we’ve usually been in company with other people.”

[Kirsty] “But did you know he was married.”

[Helen] “Oh yeah. Yeah. It’s common knowledge.”

[Kirsty] “You mean everyone knows? So we all know him? Someone I know? Who?”

[Helen] “It’s Rob … I know, I know, don’t say it … I didn’t mean it to happen. It just did.”

Helen reckons he was angry and upset, with one thing leading to another (well, more specifically, to bed)

[Kirsty] “How did you leave it? Is it going to happen again?”

[Helen] “No. No, it can’t. it was a one off. It has to be.”

[Kirsty] “So what happens now.”

[Helen] “I don’t know. I think, the only thing to do is keep our distance for a while. Cool things down … it’s the only way, don’t you think? … We’ll just keep out of each other’s way for a bit and forget all about it.”

Keep out of each other’s way in Ambridge?

That won’t be easy, will it?

Helen really should know better.

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