Sunday, 11 August 2013

Helen’s happy to be Rob’s secret – Sun 11.08.13 #thearchers

Pondering The Archers Sunday 11th August 2013
  • Helen and Rob, in bed
  • What did happen to Rob’s arm?
  • No new tractor for Tom
  • £18,200 raised for the organ
  • Kathy had to work today
  • Kathy and Pat to the playground, Neil and Tony to The Bull
  • Helen’s playing housewife
  • We didn’t need to know Helen’s hands were wet
  • Helen’s happy to be a dirty secret
  • Milk’s on the up!
  • Happy Helen
  • Open air Shakespeare

Helen and Rob, in bed

[Rob] “I could stay like this forever.”

[Helen] “That would be nice, wouldn’t it?”

We then have to suffer Rob playing cute, wee games to fool her into giving him a kiss.


[Rob] “I’d like it if you didn’t have to rush off … make it feel less … perfunctory.”

[Helen] “Thank you very much …I thought that’s how you wanted to play things for the time being?”


Rob wants to make Helen a salad.

He must be serious …

What did happen to Rob’s arm?

[Helen] “Rob, tell me, what happened to your arm?”

Seems he was set on a trestle table, which collapsed, and he fell onto a pint glass.

Jess was there. It was early in in their relationship. She sat up in casualty with him all night.

Rob sounded very wistful when he told that story.

(run Helen. Run!)

No new tractor for Tom


Seems there won’t be enough from the sale of the cows, after Tony and Pat have put aside their pension.

[Pat] “Tom won’t be pleased.”

[Tony] “But it does mean they’ll be money for other things.”

[Pat] “Like new equipment for the dairy.”

Tom will be extra un-pleased about that. It’s not right if it’s not Tom Archers’.

£18,200 raised for the organ

Well done Ambridge!

Though Neil wanted it repaired for Christmas, seems February is the earliest the organ repairers can make it.

(I didn’t realise there were that many organs in need of attention)

Kathy had to work today

And she daren’t ask for overtime.

(grow a pair!)

Kathy and Pat to the playground, Neil and Tony to The Bull

It’s almost as if the 60s didn’t happen …

Helen’s playing housewife

Helen’s already been cooking for Rob (seems he did the salad, she did the rest).

Now he’s hinting that his cottage could do with a “bit of love”.

Helen to lend that feminine touch?

Or just get on her knees and use a scrubbing brush?

Seems she’s spotting that things might be progressing in that manner. When Rob asks when she can come over again:

[Helen] “Ironing next, is it?”

We didn’t need to know Helen’s hands were wet


We didn’t.

Helen’s happy to be a dirty secret


As the cows are soon arriving at the Super Dairy:

[Rob] “We ought to make the most of the next couple of months.”

He wants to take her out Friday. Toa  restaurant or a bar.

[Rob] “It would have to be somewhere fairly far afield in case we’re spotted.”

[Helen] “Of course…”

Helen’s just happy to be with Rob in public.

(good god. She really is a simpering idiot when it comes to men)

Milk’s on the up!

Seems milk prices have recovered. In fact, they’re the best for 10 years.

Which, of course, Tony feels rather down about. He reckons the milk just waited for him to sell the herd.

Happy Helen

[Pat] “You’re looking very well though. You’ve got a real glow.”

Helen reckons she’d just been into town, and had a nice walk.

Tony mentions to Pat that he’d seen Ton in the pub earlier:

[Tony] “There’s just something about him that rubs me up the wrong way.”

And he doesn’t appreciate him giving advice to Tom.

Though both he and Pat are delighted Rob’s no longer hanging round the farm.

[Tony] “He and Helen haven’t fallen out, have they?”

Pat reckons not. Helen would have been upset.

[Tony] “She does seem very perky.”

[Pat] “Perky? I haven’t seen Helen so happy in ages.”

Oh dear.

Open air Shakespeare

Pat quite fancies it. As does Kathy.

[Pat to Tony] “Tickets for Richard the Third… it’s okay, I’m taking Kathy …”

It’s on Fri day, so Helen lies and says that she has to go out for a friend’s birthday. So Tony offers to babysit.

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