- It’ll be a sad day indeed
- Ambridge sorted Annette out
- You never know who you’re going to meet next
It’ll be a sad day indeed
Looks like the rumours are true that Phil will be leaving us. Jill’s already heading down memory lane.
The difference between Jill and Peggy will be stark and awkward. As Jill said, Jack’s still here.
The last scene Norman Painting recorded, Stir-up Sunday, was a lovely one. He’s sorely missed, just as Phil Archer will be.
Ambridge sorted Annette out
“She was a real mess when she turned up. As least she sorted herself out.”
Come now Helen – even without you knowing who the baby’s father was (that bombshell will keep) – one can hardly say that Ambridge was a good experience for Annette.
Being treated like a shag-buddy by Jazzer, having to put up with Susan’s continuous moaning about the new arrangements for the Village shop, living with Helen (constant nagging about tidiness, stimulating (!) nights in with wine and DVDs, never being left alone to sort out her own thoughts etc), all the memories of her dad, not really making any friends of her own age, having an abortion ...
All Ambridge has done is scar Annette even further.
And, leaving to go and live with your Gran is hardly going onwards and upwards (no disrespect, but it’s still hardly the life that a young lass should be leading).
You never know who you’re going to meet next
Kirsty’s bird man is back, seems like quite a decent bloke and has a name (Patrick).
For a moment, it sounded like Kirsty was going to turn him down, and Helen seemed interested enough to volunteer to take her place.
Perhaps a bit of a cat-fight over a man in the offing?
Or, is Helen about to sample the delights of the veg man’s son?
- Star Wars Episode VII:The War of the Dopeys
- Van goes like a whippet, Eddie is quick as a ferret
- Clarrie over the bonnet
- Pat ignoring or was she told?
Star Wars Episode VII:The War of the Dopeys
The battle lines are drawn – David as Darth, Jude as Hans Solo, Pip as Leila and Ruth as Yoda.
Nice to see that the kids of today still use Star Wars references, though I must insist that ‘Episode IV: A New Hope’ is the first movie, and is called Star Wars. Petty, I know ...
Van goes like a whippet, Eddie is quick as a ferret
I reckon Eddie’s just struck gold with his new business plan.
Though Bert was right to steer him away from using the word ‘Logistics’ in his business name. That’s almost as bad as ‘Solutions’.
Clarrie over the bonnet
A representational metaphorical image of Clarrie to go with her name over the bonnet?!?
As Bert put it: Blimey!
Pat ignoring or was she told?
Did Helen tell Pat about Annette being pregnant? Was that during the tearful visit they had from Helen after Annette flitted?
Or is Pat hearing the word ‘cot’ and just ignoring it out of
(a) respect for Helen, in the knowledge that she’ll speak to her when she’s ready
or (b) she, along with the rest of us, feels ill at the thought of Helen becoming a mum (in Helen’s current, and past, very shaky mental state)?
- The Great Escape
- Annette needs her shoes on to write notes
- Jazzer limbers up
- New gentleman friend for Peggy?
The Great Escape
Can’t say I’m disappointed that Annette has escaped BUT it ain’t over until the emotionally scarred teenager, or the Aussie lothario, sings ...
Poor Helen couldn’t quite believe that anyone would want to leave Ambridge. Funny that she turned to her mum rather than Brenda or Kirsty – both of them are also very well rehearsed in helping to nurse Helen’s fragile sanity.
Still – not sure that you could say that going to your Gran’s in Sheffield is quite the great escape one would expect of a young lassie.
And lest we forget that Leon still lurks somewhere in Borchester ...
Annette needs her shoes on to write notes
Well – that is what she said!
Jazzer limbers up
Good to see Jazzer getting back to himself – albeit through the attentions of yet more females.
“My heart is broken – but it is time I checked that the rest of me is working.”
Good lad. And starting up again may have an interesting impact on Fallon ...
New gentleman friend for Peggy?
Ideal – a lovely gent who’s experiencing the same circumstances with his wife.
I hope he helps Peggy to slow down a bit, and take out more time for herself.
- The Archers: where ballroom dancing is scarier than fight club ...
- The Ambridge Banksy
- Like father?
The Archers: where ballroom dancing is scarier than fight club ...
Poor Moike is so knackered that he’s getting harassed for being ‘an embarrassment’ at the dancing.
That might spell real trouble. After all, it was over a mambo or two that Vicky and Mike fell for each other.
Tired feet have go no rhythm, but is Vicky reasonable enough to understand?
The Ambridge Banksy
Who?
What will they tag next?
Can they spell right?
Like father?
Ah – that’s why Helen has been so full-on with Annette. She’s worried that Annette may be heading the same way as Greg.
So, after all the time, care and attention she’s lavishing (forcing!) onto Annette – just how is she going to react when she finds out about Leon?
Annette needs to confess soon. The longer this carries on, the more horrific Hele's reaction will be. And let’s face it, no-one’s is safe when Helen’s on a bender ...
- That’s why Helen is Hellin!
- Don’t pounce like a rabid ferret, David
That’s why Helen is Hellin!
“We decided to go away next month”
Really?
Didn’t Helen notice that Annette showed no enthusiasm, which was no surprise as the holiday talk happened during a very prolonged Hellin attack of "what shall we do? How about this? Or this? Shall we eat some snacks? Watch a DVD? Which DVD? Go for a walk? Where?"
Perhaps if Helen was better at noticing when someone isn’t showing any interest in her plans/ideas/DVDs, maybe she’ll be (in her own mind) let-down less often, and be a far happier bunny!
Don’t pounce like a rabid ferret, David
That fell on death ears Ruth – but I think many of us would be eager to know more about a student who can afford a convertible!
I did particularly like David’s and Ruth’s reaction to Pip’s description of the film
Pip: it was about “dreaming about a better life – about the human spirit”.
“Huh”: David and Ruth
- Brenda gets the size of the cow right
- Will and Nic’s brood like pairing socks, but are scared of umbrellas
- Jobs first, then snacks and DVDs: oooh – such badness!
- Yikes - that’s going to hurt Joe, Clarrie
Brenda gets the size of the cow right
Hurrah! Now that’s just the sort of thing which will look spectacular on her CV. Thanks goodness she got that degree ...
Will and Nic’s brood like pairing socks, but are scared of umbrellas
Ah – to be an age where pairing socks is fun.
But then again, it’s also an age where one can be easily tricked into being scared of everyday objects. Bless.
Jobs first, then snacks and DVDs: oooh – such badness!
Good god – can’t Helen take a hint?
I think if someone doesn’t want to take a full two pieces of toast from you, you should know that they might want you to go away and stop bothering them.
Especially when your idea of being ‘bad’ and indulgent means doing your jobs first, then watching DVDs with a few snacks (maybe the leftover cheese and coleslaw from lunch the other day?).
Hmmm, where do we reckon Annette would rather be right now?
Yikes - that’s going to hurt Joe, Clarrie.
[predication #1]
Will lends Clarrie and Eddie money for a new van, without Eddie knowing.
Will then sounds off to Ed during an argument, to prove that he is the better son.
Ed tells Eddie that Will was the source of his new van.
Ed gets angry with Clarrie, who refuses to cook tea for the next month.
Joe gets no tea.
- Susan’s family legacy about to bite her on the bottom?
- Just spit it out!
- Whacking them on doesn’t suggest quality, my friend
Susan’s family legacy about to bite her on the bottom?
Just what is Susan getting set-up for?
Jim’s buys the house Susan brother Clive had set fire to, so, naturally, everyone starts talking about him again.
Will this lead to problems for Susan? Criminal record disbarring her from continuing to work at the Village Shop?
Just spit it out
We’re not on tenterhooks anymore Annette – that’s about the 5th time you’ve ‘almost’ told Helen about your shenanigans with Leon.
You’ll give yourself an ulcer if you don’t let it all out. Or, you could just move ...
Whacking them on doesn’t suggest quality, my friend
Nice try Eddie – I do applaud your sales technique, especially turning a ‘no’ into a ‘maybe’ (albeit for another piece of work).
But, the game was up when you mentioned that you’d ‘whack them on straight’.
Ah well. Enjoy the free pint.
- Burns Night: where was Jazzer?!?
- At least Helen didn’t lock Annette up in her flat/attic/cupboard/car boot …
- Commence the farce that will become Jim’s new shelving
Burns Night: where was Jazzer?!?
It’s not obligatory, but after Jazzer’s contribution to the Antony Gormley Ambridge Plinth’s was playing the bagpipes (Ah! – I get it – it’s because he’s Scottish), I expected some sort of haggis/whisky/Burns’ love poetry combo rear attack by Jazzer on Fallon.
Or is that done and dusted, never to be muttered over a pint of Shires again?
If so – what’s Tom going to think and talk about?
At least Helen didn’t lock Annette up in her flat/attic/cupboard/car boot ...
Not sure if there is still time and opportunity for Helen to stop Annette from having an abortion, but they passed the first hurdle without Helen making any murmurings.
Has she stopped thinking about having a baby through Annette? Is she thinking about ways she can have her own? Did she find one (for a very reasonable price) on ebay?
Commence the farce that will become Jim’s new shelving
You gotta love Joe’s loyalty to his son Eddie – but taking on anything with/ for Jim is never a straight forward task.
Prediction: it all goes bottoms up, with Eddie subsequently unable to get to the pub because he’ll be spotted from Jim’s window.
Ah well. There’s always the cider in the shed.
- The overactive fantastes of Jolene
- Isn’t my bed comfortable enough for you?
- The modern equivalent of a locket
- The return of that rogue, Leon
- I’m just sad
The overactive fantastes of Jolene
Yikes! Something a bit disturbing about a daughter saying her mum’s got ‘overative fantasties’ about said daughter’s love life.
Isn’t my bed comfortable enough for you?
Titter ye not!
It was ‘Stop moving. I cannae do your straps up if you’re wriggling about.” on Sunday, then “Isn’t my bed comfortable enough for you?” today.
Jazzer and Fallon: the double-entendre double act for a new decade
The modern equivalent of a locket
Bless Jazzer and his manly ways. The USB stick was a great idea – reminiscent of a lock of hair or a teeny wee photo in a locket – though he did slightly spoil it by calling her a ‘jessie’.
Thank goodness Fallon did spell it out for Jazzer, after Jolene had to spell out that she was (unwittingly) leading him on. This one could’ve gone on for yonks …
The return of that rogue, Leon
Does this man stop so low that he could fit under a table without bending?!?
What a nasty piece of work.
You’d be forgiven for thinking that the fault lay with Helen in being too full-on too quickly, but “I never suggested we were an exclusive” is a poor excuse. The trick is to actually say outright that you’re not an exclusive, rather than put the onus onto the other person somehow knowing.
Perhaps he is just a sociopath. Saying “You’re not really in a mood with me?” to Annette was either a calculated play to show Annette that there shouldn’t be any issues between them – or a complete lack of empathy with another human being. I’d go for the latter.
Either way, Mr Leon is a rogue, old-school. He preyed on both Helen and Annette for his own ends, and is obviously stupid enough to sleep with multiple partners without using protection.
Let’s hope someone mangles his man-bits before he does even more damage …
I’m just sad
Yes Helen, that you are.
I don’t get why Helen doesn’t just tell Annette why she so desperately wants her to have a baby, though maybe Helen doesn’t realise it herself.
Considering Helen was a wee bit sane when she was ‘dating’ Leon, perhaps all she does need is a good man (as much as I hate saying that – it’s sometimes the case that some folks need a partner to be happy).
Next step internet dating?
- Annette’s getting a bit claustrophobic
- Brenda wasn’t good enough
Annette’s getting a bit claustrophobic
Oh my – as if we hadn’t guessed – Helen spelt out exactly what this baby could mean for her ...
...a two-way relationship – it would love you too – you would be the centre of its world – you would never need feel lonely again ...
Yikes! That’s a pretty heavy load for a 20 year old to think about. Annette hasn’t even dipped more than her pinkie into the world, yet her ‘friend’ Helen seems hell-bent on ignoring her needs, replacing them her with her own warped sense of what will make her happy.
Helen really, badly, desperately, needs to get out a bit more.
Brenda wasn’t good enough
Most of us will have been there at some point, but it can’t be easy being rejected for an interview when someone you know has been asked along.
Especially if you think that you’re *better* than that other person.
You gotta love Mike’s loyalty and sheer blind belief that ‘having a degree’ equates you as the right person for the job BUT is anyone else thinking that there’s a wee hint of snobbery about this yet again?
Okay – Susan comes from Horrobin stock and has been detained at her Majesty’s pleasure – but why is everyone suddenly treating her like she’s a moron? She hasn’t exactly made the Village Shop an outstanding success but, with many other village shops suffering the same fate, I don’t think that explains why she’s taking such a character kicking from all and every.
Face it Brenda – a degree does not automatically make you the best candidate – and sometimes (just sometimes) experience is valued over youth.
- As simple as taking a pill?
- Jazzer’s thinking Scandinavian ...
As simple as taking a pill?
Poor, poor, poor Annette.
She is to blame for sleeping with Leon in the first place – and for being stupid enough to do so without a condom – but you have to pity someone who is being cajoled by Helen.
Tonight, Helen made her offer to ‘be there’ for Annette and the baby, but it sounded like she was offering to be Annette’s wife rather than her friend.
Helen has a few more days to work on Annette, but there’s something intrinsically distasteful in her pressuring Annette because of her own needs and wants. Do you think she’ll stop to consider what would actually be best for Annette?
Jazzer’s thinking Scandinavian ...
And here was me thinking he reformed his ways onto a good Calvinist boy.
- Hang out with Helen or sit in a village hall?
- Tom and Helen: thank-you for being a friend
- Pat comes right in the end
Hang out with Helen or sit in a village hall?
Each to their own Brenda, but you must’ve known that Cheesestraw and a bottle of wine does not often make for a fun evening …
It was obvious that some sort of baby-story was about to happen (Helen babysitting for Nic and Will – you can always tell something is afoot when someone suddenly starts helping/spending time with folks you wouldn’t have thought they were on speaking terms, let alone have each other’s mobile numbers).
My bet was on Helen, but (shock and horrors), of course it’d have to be more twisted than that.
And, not satisfied with a mere ‘will Helen ever find out it was Leon’s?’ – I reckon we’re going to experience the deepest and darkest days of Hellin yet. And that’s surely saying something.
Helen will have to first ‘persuade’ Annette not to have the abortion, then cajole and nag until the baby is handed over. Or will she just grab and run?
Seriously - just how far can that rather neurotic woman be pushed? Mike better stay off the roads, and Leon best keep clear unless he wants to be an unwitting father for the second time (if all else fails).
Tom and Helen: thank-you for being a friend
Maybe it’s just because neither of them have seen much of life outside of Ambridge – but Tom and Helen are simply awful confidantes.
Not sure if they’re trying for a middle-England version of Les Liaisons Dangereuses, but every secret or personal titbit from the lives of their ‘mates’ tends to be exposed to someone (anyone!) else the moment they can spill.
Did Pat and Tony skip the lesson about how to keep a secret?
Pat comes right in the end
Odd, but what changed Pat’s mind about Susan being a committee member?
“Your offer to stand would be gratefully accepted.” Since when?
Or is she trying to water down Brian’s influence?
- What did we do to deserve Tom?
- Abortion: rushing into it without thinking properly
- Jazzer goes all Walter Raleigh
What did we do to deserve Tom?
Tom the Son: First he only buys his mum a bunch of flowers for her birthday – then he admits that they’re just from a supermarket. Hardly appropriate considering Pat is not one to be supportive of en-mass production methods.
Tom the Boyfriend: And he’s hardly supportive of his girlfriend Brenda’s efforts to get her career going. You’d think he’d be a bit more understanding considering he’s also self-employed – and has he forgotten all the help she’s given to Tom’s Sausages?
Tom the Brother: And no offer of more wine to his sister Helen – no offer of Helen joining them on their night out – and a typically snotty reaction to Annette possibly coming along. Considering he was there when Leon showed his true colours, you’d have thought that booze and clubbing would have been on offer to his big sis
Tom the Mate: Seriously, his obsession with Jazzer and Fallon is very, very creepy. Constantly gossiping about it, and what sort of a mate heads along, with his girlfriend, to join his pal on a ‘date’ (as Jazzer sees it)?
What a class act.
Abortion: rushing into it without thinking properly
Hmmm. Good advice from Helen, but maybe a tad ‘bolting the gate after the boar has fled’ …?
Jazzer goes all Walter Raleigh
“There’s a wee draft”
Bless him.
Even if Fallon doesn’t eventually fall for his charms, he’s learning a who new set of pulling skills which will put him in good stead. Lovely to hear him even talking about respect for a woman.
- Annette’s Abortion
- Gardner Matt
- Susan Carter: the Alan Sugar of village shop retail
Annette’s Abortion
And there was me thinking Helen had found a used condom in the bin (which would have been *eugh* and also a bit disturbing considering it is a fair while since Leon seduced Annette).
Annette’s not proving the most popular of new residents, but you do have to feel for the wee lass. The morals of sleeping with one’s landlady/friend/pseudo-mother boyfriend aside, Ambridge is proving to be as destructive to her as it was for her father.
She’s making a tough decision – only question is whether Helen will try and stop her.
We all knew there’d be some sort of pregnancy coming up – but, with Helen’s babysitting efforts for Will & Nic, it seemed like she’d be the one. Could Annette change her mind so that Helen can adopt?
Gardner Matt
Enjoying Matt as a bit more of a laid back chappy (the constant shouting was getting a bit much), but finding it hard to reconcile his new attitude to others (“they never stood a chance”) with the Tiger that we know and love. Does a few weeks in prison really change someone round that much?
Either way – I hope Lillian does get her tomatoes.
Susan Carter: the Alan Sugar of village shop retail
I do think that there is snobbery afoot with Susan not being asked onto the village shop committee, but does Susan also not realise that she’s not entirely the retail mogul that she imagines?
After all, the village shop committee is happening because the shop was making a loss. And who was the manager ….?
The Odd Couples
Jim and Kenton
Confusing – but it sounded like Kenton didn’t want Jim to settle in the village. Not sure if it was just the place that Jim’s thinking of buying (‘utilitarian’ doesn’t sound, to me, like a particularly homely home), but it actually took me a moment to realise that it was Kenton talking rather than Alistair.
I do find the whole set-up between Kenton and Jim rather odd. It was understandable that they bonded over Jim’s search for a sports car, but it hardly fits in with the mid-life crisis Kenton was having pre-Jim (his tattoo). Of course, Kenton might just be in it for Jim’s investment …
Either way, Kenton’s battle for ‘tapas and 5.1 surround sound’ is a worry when there’s already a highly recommended tapas restaurant (even Cheesestraw was happy to eat something there). Bless – it’ll all end up as yet another reason for David to be disparaging about his brother’s ambitions.
Helen and Annette
From tonight’s episode, you’d be forgiven for thinking that Helen hasn’t actually met Annette. On talking to Fallon about Annette, and how she’s been quiet and unsocial, Helen mentioned ‘You know what Annette’s like’.
Yes – I think we do – but quiet and unsocial ain’t Annette!
Snort-worthy was also the idea that she needed space to herself. Are they talking about the same young woman who crashed into Helen’s life, deposited herself in Helen’s flat, then took off with the (hardly shy and retiring) Jazzer?!?
How long do we think this one will rumble on for?
Will Annette confess?
Will Leon return and reveal all (though attempting a reconciliation with Helen by trying on a ‘all friends together’ session)?
Will someone else discover Annette’s secret?
Or, will Annette take herself onto somewhere else, which might be a good idea considering she’s a slip of a lass who doesn’t need to bury herself in a life with a mother-figure who, at 30, seems to be obsessed with staying in and watching DVDs. Not that I’m saying there’s anything wrong with that, but, unless Annette takes more time to find friends of her own age, she’s in for a very dry time …
Jazzer and Fallon
Is this storyline setting up to be the big love of 2010?
Do we think that Jazzer, if he wins Fallon, will actually be happy settling down?
I think what we do need to keep an eye on is Tom’s growing obsession with Jazzer and Fallon – and his rather distasteful need to watch proceedings, and comment on it to all and every. Is this a signal that he may be hankering for his own chase? Do I sense a jilting at the alter???
