The Archers: Helen tells Susan and Vicky … the Aldridges and Carter’s clash over what is a ‘good’ barbeque
- Helen might as well have put it in the Echo
- “Of course you’re not a gossip - but you do take a keen interest”
- Susan and Vicky then chew this new information over
- Then Jennifer is told
- “I suppose that is rather Helen – she’s always been original”
- Roasted swan and grilled peacock
Helen might as well have put it in the Echo
That was crafty, Helen.
Telling Susan and Vicky is better than it being in the local paper – it’ll be spread within seconds!
Creating a bit of consternation for Susan that folks might think Alice and Chris had a shotgun wedding ,
(“that's not why they got married - they're in love!”)
Helen then tells Susan her news. Though, she didn’t quite present Susan with arguments that she’s ever agree with:
“who needs men when we've got science to help us out”
“think of all the woman who have to shackle themselves to unsuitable men just to have a baby”
“Of course you’re not a gossip - but you do take a keen interest”
But where Helen failed to recognise that any opinion said to Susan will be taken to heart (without a man? What’s wrong with my Neil!), she came up trumps in wooing Vicky.
I though Helen was being too subtle at first, but Vicky finally twigged … and was genuinely delighted!
Who’d have thought that Vicky would prove to be so understanding. She’ll be a grand, and very loud, supporter for Helen in the coming months.
Also very revealing that Vicky had also pondered having a child by herself one.
And very ominous that Vicky later didn’t entirely dispel the idea that she might still feel like that … Good God!
Susan and Vicky then chew this new information over
“Such an attractive girl - not natural she has no man in her life” (Susan)
“only got her word that there wasn't – it could be a cover story for one night stand” (Susan)
“It’s weird … it’s not the normal way” (Susan)
“we don't all meet the man of our dreams when we're barely out of the classroom” (Vicky)
I loved the way that Vicky explained the difference between donor insemination and IVF before Susan could fully get her rant on.
Great stuff.
Then Jennifer is told
By Vicky and Susan. Nightmare!
Thinking at first that they’re talking about Brenda, all Jennifer can muster when realising that it’s Helen who is pregnant is:
“Oh good heavens!”
Then rushes off to call Lilian and Peggy.
I wonder how the Archers clan will fall into camps about this?
For: Helen, Pat, Lilian, Adam, Ian, Deborah, Kate, Alistair, Kenton, Ruth, Elizabeth, Nigel
Against: Tony, Peggy, Jennifer, Alice, Shula, Kathy, David
Non plussed: Tom, Brian, Matt
?
“I suppose that is rather Helen – she’s always been original”
Indeed.
And despite my own horror when this was first mentioned, I’m putting myself in the ‘for’ camp.
In saying that, I won’t be held responsible for how the poor wee mite will turn out. One can only hope Helen has a complete personality change by becoming a mother.
Lovely girl, but oh so controlling …
Roasted swan and grilled peacock
I know Brian was just jesting, but he wasn’t too far off in spotting what Jennifer expects of a barbeque. And of course, a good one doesn’t involve Tom’s burgers.
And here’s the problem. While Jennifer thinks that Susan should know Tom’s grill would be “appropriate” for the party to celebrate Alice and Chris’ marriage, she couldn’t be further from the truth.
Looks like the mothers-in-law need to spend a bit of quality time getting to know each other. That’ll be interesting …
The Archers: Community planting … David outs Alice’s marriage into context
- Matt’s doing grand for his age
- Does that explain why Kathy is such a xxxx?
- An acre in a box
- “at least we got a working Horrobin with no criminal record, so far”
- Is anyone good at breakfast small talk?
- Party!
- Yes Kenton – you are just damned!
Matt’s doing grand for his age
63 on Saturday.
Good on you, me old mucker.
Does that explain why Kathy is such a xxxx?
She “quite fancies” some of the old folks’ trips out.
57 going on 82?
An acre in a box
That sounds like a lovely way to do some ‘community planting’.
Although, I am amazed they’ve managed to even find a wee strip of land to plant on. Between Council rules and reticent landowners, I’d have thought they’d have to do another round of guerrilla gardening to get anything down.
“at least we got a working Horrobin with no criminal record, so far”
You can always depend on Brian to find the positive side of anything (albeit sarcastically!).
And David should have given him something to think about. Chris is certainly no Jude!
Is anyone good at breakfast small talk?
Well, I know some folks are just bursting with happiness and energy first thing, but it’d hardly be easy for Chris to chat away at breakfast when (a) it is Brian and Jennifer he’s got to chat to, who are (b) fairly unhappy that he’s married their daughter and (c) they are blatantly snobs about his family.
Party!
Are you also getting the impression that this party is going to be quite a traditional English farce?
Alice is excited. Jennifer’s hoping it’ll go away. Susan is beside herself with glee. And Brian reckons that the more people invited, the more the ‘Horrobin quarter” will be “diluted”.
That’s got to spell trouble.
Yes Kenton – you are just damned!
If he does something, he’s shouted at. If he doesn’t, he’s shouted at.
But it’s hard to feel sorry for Kenton when he’s created at least half of this mess with Kathy
“I don’t even care”
I couldn’t have said it better myself
The Archers: Chocolates for Emma … Fallon has a day out with Jolene … Kenton’s a bit rough bit starts yet again
- Flowers, now chocolates (and seemingly sweetpeas)
- Do the punters really care about Jolene?
- Kenton’s making things worse, and worse, and worse …
- “Bagging an Aldridge”
Flowers, now chocolates (and seemingly sweetpeas)
Well, you could see that as sweet – or you could see it as a “bit creepy” (as Ed later said).
Bless wee Josh (assuming it is him). He even made a homemade box for the chocolates.
Tender moments, and if he learns anything, it’ll be that thoughtful gifts will eventually get him the girl. As long as he actually gives them the gifts rather than leaving them on doorsteps. And if he knows the girl might be interested. Not in a relationship. Much, much older than him …
Still, it’s nice that Ed isn’t getting all ‘Will’ on Emma. He doesn’t seem that bothered, whereas Will would be following Nic round, belting every man that looked at him (if the gifts were being left for her).
Do the punters really care about Jolene?
I think Jolene’s right – they care far more about their pints.
How long will this go on for?
It’s a bit ominous that Fallon’s now saying how much she’s really committed to the pub. That can only mean bad things are afoot.
Mind you, with Fallon’s ability to inject a sense of normality into any conversation
(“didn't rate the mardy cow at reception”)
I reckon her and Jolene will always make their way. Though the path may be a bit rough at times.
Kenton’s making things worse, and worse, and worse …
Already in trouble for getting a tad tight at the Grundy’s, Kenton takes Kirtsy’s offer of a drink and a chat after work.
So stays out late. Again. While drinking. Again. With Kirsty. Again.
Oh deary me.
Exactly what is Kirsty up to? Why get involved, or is she really that bored that she find Kenton (a) good company and (b) doesn’t worry about Kathy hunting her down to tell her to stay away?
It was interesting that Kenton admitted that he was a bit put out by Kathy’s reaction to Sid’s death.
“her reaction to his death was so big. I don’t think he ever really stopped loving him”
Can Kenton’s lack of care and attention be because he’s jealous of a dead man?
Or is he right? Was Kathy truly always Sid’s?
Or, just an excuse???
“Bagging an Aldridge”
Ah Ed. You’re a cheeky one alright!
First he calls Chris a
“jammy so and so [for] bagging an Aldridge”
Then he congratulates Chris for marrying for love “first time round”.
Lucky Will wasn’t round to hear that dig …
The Archers: Peggy approves of Alice and Chris … Susan talks it through with Jennifer
- “love will always cross the class divide”
- Is ‘the horsey set’ really still that important?
- Susan Vs. Jennifer round 2
- Neil gets a word in
- Now that’s a great granny!
“love will always cross the class divide”
So says Lynda, so that should be that.
I have no doubt it won’t be, though. Just whoever listens to Lynda (except Robert)?
Is ‘the horsey set’ really still that important?
Susan’s over the moon that Chris is
“finally on the inside of the horsey set”
Living in a rural area myself, I’m all too aware that this ‘horsey set’ still has money and some of the local dignitary muscle, but I wasn’t aware that some folks still desperately aspire to be ‘part’ of them.
Still, we are talking about Susan here. She sees her chance to get rid of the Horrobin tint to her family, and she’s grabbing it with everything she’s got.
Sober or not.
Susan Vs. Jennifer round 2
First Susan brings Jennifer yesterday’s flowers.
Hugs her.
Asks:
“do you find you burn things in an aga?”
And it doesn’t really improve from there.
I think we’re going to see a simultaneous knock-out eventually …
Neil gets a word in
“don't ever think you don't deserve her”
Good Neil. That’s the way to be a nice dad, and truly proud of your son (rather than being more excited about the potential high society cocktail parties, Susan).
And lovely that he shared his Shula crush. She should have grabbed you when she could, my friend.
Even more – Neil reminded us that the horror of being related works both ways.
“I still struggle to think of myself related to Brian”
Now that’s a great granny!
Peggy’s pleased for Alice and Chris, and helps them build their deposit for a house.
Then, she takes on Jennifer:
“oh you are a misery”
“you really are a cracking snob”
“your grandmother came from the east end of London. Look to your own roots before you criticise.”
No mention of her alcoholic publican dad though …
Still, I can’t see Jennifer changing her opinions just because Peggy has a go.
“A joint mortgage will really complicate things when they get divorced”
“She should’ve have married someone of her own class”
Mortgages and class. Looks like Jennifer has seen, judged, and set her mind.
The Archers: Emma’s getting flowers … Chris and Alice are back (with big news!)
- Emma’s flowers
- Oho! On yourself, Alice and Chris!
- Jennifer and Brian’s reaction
- Susan and Neil’s reaction
- Susan Vs Jennifer
- The Bull’s slipping fast
Emma’s flowers
It has to be Josh.
Or, could it be a very belated attempt from Will (now that Nic is seemingly getting more male attention).
Oho! On yourself, Alice and Chris!
With ‘Brick’ and ‘Linda-Lou’ as their witnesses, heart-shaped keyrings as part of the package - Alice and Chris got married in Las Vegas.
Classy (not!).
What a wonderful moment – Jennifer and Brian only slowly realising what had happened as Chris carries Alice over the threshold.
Brian’s right that Chris’ proposal wasn’t exactly original (“Alice … will you marry me?”), but at least it was heartfelt.
But how many years before Alice does bemoan the fact that she didn’t have the whole shebang? What will it take for her to change her mind from the lack of an engagement ring being a good thing (they afford a better wedding ring), to it being a sign that Chris didn’t ever really care.
15 minutes of fame is one thing, but I can’t see little Princess Alice always being so enamoured of her 15 minute wedding.
Or, am I just being too cynical?
Jennifer and Brian’s reaction
Jennifer:
“How could she do this to us?”
“What the hell has she done?”
“The biggest mistake of Alice’s life”
“They must have been high on something”
“She might have stayed in the area if she married into one of the good families – not settled for the village farrier
”
“Aunty Chris and George Barford all over again”*
“I’m never going to see one of my children have a proper wedding”**
“At least we don’t have to fork out for a wedding”
“We can look on this as Alice’s starter marriage”
Susan and Neil’s reaction
“Never been so happy in me life”
“Wonderful news! Congratulations son”
“There’s a bottle of cava in the fridge”
“Our Christopher … a married man!”
“We’ll ring a quarter for you”
(did I get that bell ringing related term right?)
Susan Vs Jennifer
“It’s Susan – your new in-law!”
Oh that must have been a phrase which Jennifer used to wake up screaming about.
And that it happens for real.
It’d be easy to feel sorry for her if she wasn’t been such an undeserving snob. It’d be most folks nightmare to have Susan related to them, but Jennifer simply doesn’t have the excuse that Susan’s of a lower class.
Publican’s daughter. New money from her husband.
Hardly the stuff of royalty.
Though:
“Neil and I fell in love after he built me a pig pen”
Doesn’t exactly inspire a sense of decorum, neither.
So, while Susan thinks:
“The important thing is our children are united”
While Jennifer gets the last word:
“Good grief Brian – I’m related to a Horrobin!”
Laugh?
I nearly chocked my pint of shires.
The Bull’s slipping fast
Or, more correctly, it’s slipping because it’s not moving at all.
A menu that hasn’t changed in over a month.
How very dare they!
It’s not as if anyone’s died …
*Chris Barford, nee Archers, formerly Johnson, was Doris’ much anticipated and adored only daughter. After doomed love affairs, and a very difficult (to say the least) marriage to Paul Johnson (who died and was buried in German) she married ex-policeman and gamekeeper George Barford. Recovering alcoholic, counting a barmaid amongst his previous affairs, having also lived with a woman without being wed to her. Not entirely a Horrobin, but enough ‘colour’ in his past to make the Archer clan a tad snooty towards him.
**As Brian pointed out, Adam and Ian did have the full ensemble for their wedding. Not sure why that doesn’t count, and Adam wouldn’t be amused to hear it dismissed so easily …
