- Poochy gets 4 biscuits
- Clive’s away for 4 years
- Tracey apologises to Emma
- All sorted?
- Have Joe and Bert (Fry) no shame?
- What was in Bob’s letter to Joe?
Showing posts with label keith horrobin. Show all posts
Showing posts with label keith horrobin. Show all posts
Thursday, 3 January 2013
Joe and Bert (Fry) ransack Bob Pullen’s: 01.01.13 #ambridgeextra
Ambridge Extra Tuesday 1st January 2013
Sunday, 30 December 2012
Donna escapes Clive: Tues 25.12.12 #ambridgeextra
Ambridge Extra Tuesday 25th December 2012
I think it’s boxing day?
Hard to tell in in Ambridge Extra land.
Clive answers Donna’s phone to Keith
Clive claims he’s fixing a tap.
Then hangs up on Keith, and doesn’t tell Donna she’s called.
(hsssssssss!)
Donna drugs Clive
Clive had let himself to Donna’s. He then demanded to know where she’d been, and where she was off to this afternoon. He stakes her handbag, including her visiting order to see Keith this afternoon. He’ll give them back:
(hssssssssss!)
Clive then wants to watch a film, but Donna can’t find Poochy.
Clive’s tied Poochy up in the garden.
(hssssssssss!)
Clive then demands a cup of tea.
Which Donna promptly drugs with pills.
Hurrah!
Not such a Daft Donna after all.
Keith looks awful
Tracey was in seeing Keith, and he sounded a bit muffled at first.
Turns out he had his hand over his mouth to try and hide the fact he’d ‘lost’ a tooth.
H also hasn’t shaved, and has lost weight.
Sounds like it.
But the gang that’s beating him up every day also won’t be helping. When we hear Keith trying to settle down for the night later on, it’s to calls of “we’re going to get you, Horrobin!”
Keith’s more worried about Donna than himself. He hasn’t been able to speak to her for 2 weeks, and he’s not at all amused that Clive’s at his house. Keith’s worried Tracey told Clive about the loan shark, and Clive’s there to see him off.
(which I suppose could be a good and a bad thing)
But Keith suspects there’s more to it.
Tracey comes good, and covers for Donna. She says Donna can’t cope with seeing Keith in prison.
But then, Donna turns up. And bless Keith – he notices she’s changed her hair (it must be love!).
Donna’s about to tell Keith about Clive, but Keith tells her first that she’s all that gives him hope. So she keeps stum.
Tricky.
Tracey has a heart
After their visit with Keith.
Tracey starts shouting at Donna. Donna starts crying. Tracey realises there’s more to this horrible situation with Clive.
Donna tells Tracey about drugging Clive.
Seems Donna genuinely thought Clive was just loaning her the money (Daft Donna!):
Donna reckons she was just so alone, so desperate that someone taking charge and looking after her made her feel safe. Course, Clive want repayment in kinds …
Tracey tells Donna to stay the night while she works out what to do.
Though that means leaving Poochy alone, possibly with Clive.
Will no-one think of the dog?
- I think it’s boxing day?
- Clive answers Donna’s phone to Keith
- Donna drugs Clive
- Keith looks awful
- Tracey has a heart
I think it’s boxing day?
Hard to tell in in Ambridge Extra land.
Clive answers Donna’s phone to Keith
[Keith] “What are you doing in our house?!?”
Clive claims he’s fixing a tap.
Then hangs up on Keith, and doesn’t tell Donna she’s called.
(hsssssssss!)
Donna drugs Clive
Clive had let himself to Donna’s. He then demanded to know where she’d been, and where she was off to this afternoon. He stakes her handbag, including her visiting order to see Keith this afternoon. He’ll give them back:
[Chris] “When I’m ready. Til then,. You’re going nowhere.”
(hssssssssss!)
Clive then wants to watch a film, but Donna can’t find Poochy.
Clive’s tied Poochy up in the garden.
(hssssssssss!)
Clive then demands a cup of tea.
Which Donna promptly drugs with pills.
[Donna] “Enough to knock out a horse.”
Hurrah!
Not such a Daft Donna after all.
Keith looks awful
Tracey was in seeing Keith, and he sounded a bit muffled at first.
Turns out he had his hand over his mouth to try and hide the fact he’d ‘lost’ a tooth.
H also hasn’t shaved, and has lost weight.
[Tracey] “So you’ve given up on yourself, have you?”
Sounds like it.
But the gang that’s beating him up every day also won’t be helping. When we hear Keith trying to settle down for the night later on, it’s to calls of “we’re going to get you, Horrobin!”
Keith’s more worried about Donna than himself. He hasn’t been able to speak to her for 2 weeks, and he’s not at all amused that Clive’s at his house. Keith’s worried Tracey told Clive about the loan shark, and Clive’s there to see him off.
(which I suppose could be a good and a bad thing)
But Keith suspects there’s more to it.
[Keith] “It’s killing me, this not knowing. Has she left me Tracey?”
Tracey comes good, and covers for Donna. She says Donna can’t cope with seeing Keith in prison.
But then, Donna turns up. And bless Keith – he notices she’s changed her hair (it must be love!).
Donna’s about to tell Keith about Clive, but Keith tells her first that she’s all that gives him hope. So she keeps stum.
Tricky.
Tracey has a heart
After their visit with Keith.
[Tracey] “It’s a good job we’re in a public place as my hand is itching to slap your face!”
Tracey starts shouting at Donna. Donna starts crying. Tracey realises there’s more to this horrible situation with Clive.
[Tracey] “I know I’ve got a big gob, but I’ve been known to shut up once in a while and listen.”
Donna tells Tracey about drugging Clive.
[Donna] “He terrifies me.”
Seems Donna genuinely thought Clive was just loaning her the money (Daft Donna!):
[Donna] “It was the house and me he wanted.”
Donna reckons she was just so alone, so desperate that someone taking charge and looking after her made her feel safe. Course, Clive want repayment in kinds …
[Tracey] “He’d do that to his own brother. I don’t believe it … right! …”
Tracey tells Donna to stay the night while she works out what to do.
Though that means leaving Poochy alone, possibly with Clive.
Will no-one think of the dog?
Saturday, 29 December 2012
Donna gets intimate with Clive: Tues 18.12.12 #ambridgeextra
Ambridge Extra Tuesday 18 December 2012
Keith tripped
Or at least that’s what he’s telling everyone.
We got the joy (not!) of listening in to Keith getting beaten up
When a prison officer fins him:
The officer tells Keith that he has to buck up. He can’t show he’s weak. He must be respectful, but not humble. He needs to join courses, never look at his feet, don’t tell anyone about himself, keep busy and keep out of trouble.
Am I being daft in thinking that Clive could ask to be put on the special wing, away from general prisoners?
It would mean living with some very undesirable others – but isn’t that preferable to being beaten up for being a grass … for 2 long years …?
Clive takes advantage
Well, we all knew this was coming.
Clive’s brought Donna roses.
Clive reckons he’s dumped Jackie.
(who mist not have existed in the first place)
Clive also brought Donna truffles.
And is going to fix her boiler.
(I bet he will!)
Clive then tells her that he’s taking her out for a meal that evening.
Clive then gives her money to get her nails and hair done, and also tells her what dress to wear.
(On. My. Word. There’s so much wrong with that, I don’t know where to begin)
Tracey loses her job
As if Bert making his trellis on the kitchen table isn’t a frustration enough (Bert claims it’s too cold out), Tracey has also been told she won’t be needed back at the school. She was only on a monthly contract and though they have still offered her a formal hearing, Tracey won’t suffer it.
Tracey has a point that it would have been far more fair to tell Tracey after the Christmas break that her services were no longer required, but I don’t suppose they can have folks who use ‘excessive force’ on kids working in the school.
At least Bert walks Poochy
At least someone is treating that dog well, other than giving it cuddles.
What type of dog do we think Poochy is?
Donna makes her (him?) sounds like a wee yappy type thing, but Poochy has quite a butch bark.
Donna chooses Clive over Keith
Donna was due to see Keith with Tracey, but calls Tracey (while outing on a cough) to say she’s too ill.
Well spotted Tracey.
Donna’s off out with Clive.
Tracey covers for Donna when she sees Keith. Obviously for Keith’s sake, rather than Donna’s.
Keith’s very upset about not seeing Donna. He’d also called their house earlier on, but only got Bert.
Seems some of the other prisoners have been winding him up about how wives don’t always stay faithful …
Clive comforts Donna
Donna’s about to send Clive a text.
She’s not sure whether to end it with a kiss.
She decides to do so.
The giggles.
What a silly, silly woman …
Anyhoo, when Clive picks Donna up, he also gives her a necklace to go with her dress.
He kisses her.
Donna kisses back.
And off to bed they go.
*sigh*
- Keith tripped
- Clive takes advantage
- Tracey loses her job
- At least Bert walks Poochy
- Donna chooses Clive over Keith
- Clive comforts Donna
Keith tripped
Or at least that’s what he’s telling everyone.
We got the joy (not!) of listening in to Keith getting beaten up
When a prison officer fins him:
[Officer] “Look, lad, you’re showing yourself up”.
The officer tells Keith that he has to buck up. He can’t show he’s weak. He must be respectful, but not humble. He needs to join courses, never look at his feet, don’t tell anyone about himself, keep busy and keep out of trouble.
[Officer] “You’ve a long road ahead of you.”
Am I being daft in thinking that Clive could ask to be put on the special wing, away from general prisoners?
It would mean living with some very undesirable others – but isn’t that preferable to being beaten up for being a grass … for 2 long years …?
Clive takes advantage
Well, we all knew this was coming.
Clive’s brought Donna roses.
Clive reckons he’s dumped Jackie.
(who mist not have existed in the first place)
Clive also brought Donna truffles.
And is going to fix her boiler.
[Clive] “Keith will see me right, when he gets out.”
(I bet he will!)
[Donna] “Oh Clive, thank you so much.”
[Clive] “I said I’d help you out, and I meant it. I’m a man of me word, me.”
Clive then tells her that he’s taking her out for a meal that evening.
[Clive] “It’d be nice to have such interesting company, and even better when it comes in such an attractive package … You’re a lovely woman Donna. I always said so … if I had a sweet woman like you, I’d have never got myself banged up. My brother is such an idiot.”
Clive then gives her money to get her nails and hair done, and also tells her what dress to wear.
[Clive] “The one you wore to mum’s funeral. You looked a cracker in that.”
(On. My. Word. There’s so much wrong with that, I don’t know where to begin)
Tracey loses her job
As if Bert making his trellis on the kitchen table isn’t a frustration enough (Bert claims it’s too cold out), Tracey has also been told she won’t be needed back at the school. She was only on a monthly contract and though they have still offered her a formal hearing, Tracey won’t suffer it.
[Tracey] “Oh what’s the point. They got it in for me there anyway, they can stick their job. … All I wanted was a nice Christmas for everybody, why should that be too much to ask?”
Tracey has a point that it would have been far more fair to tell Tracey after the Christmas break that her services were no longer required, but I don’t suppose they can have folks who use ‘excessive force’ on kids working in the school.
At least Bert walks Poochy
At least someone is treating that dog well, other than giving it cuddles.
What type of dog do we think Poochy is?
Donna makes her (him?) sounds like a wee yappy type thing, but Poochy has quite a butch bark.
Donna chooses Clive over Keith
Donna was due to see Keith with Tracey, but calls Tracey (while outing on a cough) to say she’s too ill.
[Tracey] “You don’t sound to me like you’re at death’s door.”
Well spotted Tracey.
Donna’s off out with Clive.
Tracey covers for Donna when she sees Keith. Obviously for Keith’s sake, rather than Donna’s.
Keith’s very upset about not seeing Donna. He’d also called their house earlier on, but only got Bert.
Seems some of the other prisoners have been winding him up about how wives don’t always stay faithful …
Clive comforts Donna
Donna’s about to send Clive a text.
She’s not sure whether to end it with a kiss.
She decides to do so.
The giggles.
What a silly, silly woman …
Anyhoo, when Clive picks Donna up, he also gives her a necklace to go with her dress.
[Clive] “You need somebody who knows how to treat a lady.”
He kisses her.
Donna kisses back.
[Donna] “Oh, that wasn’t supposed to happen.”
[Clive] “No. You sure … we all need some comfort sometimes …Donna, you know I;m attracted to you, I think you are to me too … you are so hard to resist … And I won’t tell if you don’t.”
And off to bed they go.
*sigh*
Donna goes for a drink with Clive: Tues 11.12.12 #ambridgeextra
Ambridge Extra Tuesday 11th December 2012
Donna has financial woes
The bloke from the ‘Independent Financial Company’ is round hassling Donna for a repayment.
Daft woman took a loan from him.
When Donna tells him she hasn’t got the money on her, he forces her into his car to go to a cash machine.
Seems Donna owes the chap £540, but as she can’t make her full repayment today, he’ll take £200 and add on steeper interest. Once he’s got his money, he also refuses to take Donna back home.
What a silly woman is that Donna.
When she’s later in seeing Keith, he tells her to tell Tracey about the loan shark. He also tries to help with the other bills, but the guards won’t let Donna show him. They take the paperwork away, and take Keith away from a strip search.
A tad overkill, but surely Donna can cope with paying bills herself – or even be capable of understanding a bill on her tod.
What can Keith do about it from prison?
Right enough, when Keith later on tries to call the electricity company to deal with the bill, he finds he can’t. Every number he wants to call must be on his cleared list. It’ll take until well after Christmas for the number to be approved.
Maybe Tracey can help ….
Tracey’s up in front of the head
It’s been established that Tracey was asleep while supposed to be supervising the kids, so she has to go to a hearing.
Hmmm.
Anyone else reckon Tracey will soon be claiming the dole again?
Bert still wants to go to Susan’s
Bert’s obviously worried about the quality of the Christmas dinner on offer at Tracey’s. She’s even had to get a frozen turkey, after missing out on all of the Grundy turkeys.
He reckons it’s stupid putting Tracey to such bother when Susan is already cooking.
Bert nearly (just nearly) said that Susan was a better cook, when pointing out that she does all the proper trimmings.
Of course, Tracey does not concur.
Though as Tracey said that, she also put two bags of sprouts on her shopping list.
Later on, Bert realises Tracey’s making a real effort, and drops all talk of going to Susan’s.
Phew!
I doubt Emma and Tracey could have sat at the same table without coming to blows.
Tracey goes shopping
Though Bert reckons he doesn’t need anything, Tracey wants to get him a treat.
She’s also getting presents for Emma’s kids.
And while she’s there, she gets tablets for both of her kids.
Has Tracey got that sort of money to start off with?
Keith got soap
Donna’s visiting Keith. She’s not enjoying the experience. Some chap keeps staring at her.
The chap is talking to a woman who is likewise staring at Donna and Keith.
(ha!)
Keith tells Donna the chap is from the gang. Who Keith grassed up. So are therefore not impressed with Keith.
Still, it’s not all bad for Keith. He tells Donna he managed to get a bar of soap.
What a life …
… course, it’s how own fault for setting fire to Brookfield’s barn.
Bert’s rambling
He’s been out fixing up a willow trellis for a climbing rose. In memory of the Nat King Cole song. In memory of Ivy.
Seems they met on a youth club ramble.
Tracey won’t help Donna
Donna takes Keith’s advice, and talks to Tracey about her money problems.
But Tracey won’t help.
Not. At. All.
She reckons she hardly has any money herself (true) and that Donna shouldn’t be worrying Keith with money problems (slightly true).
Donna reckons it’s Keith’s fault they’re in this mess.
Actually, Tracey gets quite aggressive at Donna. She’s obviously been annoyed with Donna for a few decades or so.
So. Keith can’t help. Tracey won’t help.
Who can Donna turn to?
Clive’s there for Donna
Donna goes out for a drink with Clive.
She’s feeling very sorry for herself. Very put upon, alone and now reckons Keith never had any time for her.
(she’s obviously never noticed he was out and about trying to keep her in the lifestyle she was accustomed. By legal and illegal means).
Oh dear …
- Donna has financial woes
- Tracey’s up in front of the head
- Bert still wants to go to Susan’s
- Tracey goes shopping
- Keith got soap
- Bert’s rambling
- Tracey won’t help Donna
- Clive’s there for Donna
Donna has financial woes
The bloke from the ‘Independent Financial Company’ is round hassling Donna for a repayment.
Daft woman took a loan from him.
[Loan bloke] “It’s a payday loan, today I get paid.”
When Donna tells him she hasn’t got the money on her, he forces her into his car to go to a cash machine.
Seems Donna owes the chap £540, but as she can’t make her full repayment today, he’ll take £200 and add on steeper interest. Once he’s got his money, he also refuses to take Donna back home.
[Loan bloke] “I’ll be back next Tuesday Donna. Merry Christmas.”
What a silly woman is that Donna.
When she’s later in seeing Keith, he tells her to tell Tracey about the loan shark. He also tries to help with the other bills, but the guards won’t let Donna show him. They take the paperwork away, and take Keith away from a strip search.
A tad overkill, but surely Donna can cope with paying bills herself – or even be capable of understanding a bill on her tod.
What can Keith do about it from prison?
Right enough, when Keith later on tries to call the electricity company to deal with the bill, he finds he can’t. Every number he wants to call must be on his cleared list. It’ll take until well after Christmas for the number to be approved.
Maybe Tracey can help ….
Tracey’s up in front of the head
It’s been established that Tracey was asleep while supposed to be supervising the kids, so she has to go to a hearing.
Hmmm.
Anyone else reckon Tracey will soon be claiming the dole again?
Bert still wants to go to Susan’s
Bert’s obviously worried about the quality of the Christmas dinner on offer at Tracey’s. She’s even had to get a frozen turkey, after missing out on all of the Grundy turkeys.
He reckons it’s stupid putting Tracey to such bother when Susan is already cooking.
[Bert] “It’s such a vexation for you. Susan likes cooking …”
Bert nearly (just nearly) said that Susan was a better cook, when pointing out that she does all the proper trimmings.
Of course, Tracey does not concur.
[Tracey] “All that fuss over chucking a turkey into an oven for a few hours, and boiling up loads of sprouts … she always did think she was a cut above …”
Though as Tracey said that, she also put two bags of sprouts on her shopping list.
Later on, Bert realises Tracey’s making a real effort, and drops all talk of going to Susan’s.
Phew!
I doubt Emma and Tracey could have sat at the same table without coming to blows.
Tracey goes shopping
Though Bert reckons he doesn’t need anything, Tracey wants to get him a treat.
She’s also getting presents for Emma’s kids.
[Tracey] “It’s not their fault if their mother is a cold callous backstabber, is it?”
And while she’s there, she gets tablets for both of her kids.
Has Tracey got that sort of money to start off with?
Keith got soap
Donna’s visiting Keith. She’s not enjoying the experience. Some chap keeps staring at her.
[Donna] “The bloke with the two fingers tattooed on the back of his head.”
The chap is talking to a woman who is likewise staring at Donna and Keith.
[Donna] “I don’t like the look of her. Very common.”
(ha!)
Keith tells Donna the chap is from the gang. Who Keith grassed up. So are therefore not impressed with Keith.
Still, it’s not all bad for Keith. He tells Donna he managed to get a bar of soap.
[Tracey] “Last time I spoke to him he was trying to trade his cereal for some.”
What a life …
… course, it’s how own fault for setting fire to Brookfield’s barn.
Bert’s rambling
He’s been out fixing up a willow trellis for a climbing rose. In memory of the Nat King Cole song. In memory of Ivy.
Seems they met on a youth club ramble.
[Tracey] “It’s you that’s rambling.”
Tracey won’t help Donna
Donna takes Keith’s advice, and talks to Tracey about her money problems.
But Tracey won’t help.
Not. At. All.
She reckons she hardly has any money herself (true) and that Donna shouldn’t be worrying Keith with money problems (slightly true).
Donna reckons it’s Keith’s fault they’re in this mess.
[Tracey] “You’re sat there with a designer handbag and gold wrapped around your neck.”
Actually, Tracey gets quite aggressive at Donna. She’s obviously been annoyed with Donna for a few decades or so.
[Tracey] “You’ve had it easy all these years, Keith’s treated you like a princess.”
So. Keith can’t help. Tracey won’t help.
Who can Donna turn to?
Clive’s there for Donna
Donna goes out for a drink with Clive.
She’s feeling very sorry for herself. Very put upon, alone and now reckons Keith never had any time for her.
(she’s obviously never noticed he was out and about trying to keep her in the lifestyle she was accustomed. By legal and illegal means).
[Clive] “Think of me as your own personal shoulder to cry on.”
Oh dear …
Friday, 28 December 2012
David wants to relax this Christmas: Wed 05.12.12 #thearchers
The Archers Wednesday 5th December 2012
Mike’s not impressed by Keith Horrobin’s sentence
(if you don’t listen to Ambridge Extra – Keith Horrobin was sentenced to 4 years yesterday. All Ambridge Extra blog posts can be found here: http://ponderingthearchers.blogspot.co.uk/search/label/ambridge%20extra)
He thinks 4 years wasn’t enough.
Ed concurs, though David (one of the direct victims) thinks it’s a good and proper sentence.
Jamie’s good with a chipper
Reckons Mike.
He and Jamie have to spread the chippings on Home Farm land so that the shooters don’t get much on their gaiters.
(Why have gaiters if you can’t cope with mud?!?)
Matt takes Lilian shopping
Matt’s stepping up his ‘good guy’ routine.
First, he’s been cosying up to James.
Now he’s taken time off of work (!) to take Lilian shopping for the afternoon, and promises not to complain while Lilian has a proper browse (!!).
Lilian doesn’t really sound that excited about shopping with Matt.
Matt has to work very hard to convince her to buy a very expensive coat that she showed a liking for. Which isn’t very Lilian-like.
And when Vicky and Mike stumble upon her and Matt (while Lilian is still trying the expensive coast):
And then Lilian suggests they just wait for the sales … not Lilian type behaviour at all.
She obviously only has thoughts of her Paul …
Mike and Vicky learn how to bathe a doll
Did Mike really do absolutely nothing when Brenda and Roy were wee?
Seems so.
All in a name
Vicky likes Bethany, Angela, Claire and Daisy.
So far.
I’m sure it’ll change a few times …
Mike wasn’t too keen on Daisy (though I don’t suppose he’ll actually have much say):
David’s time off is good news for Ed
David asks Ed for a ‘favour’. He wants to take some proper time off over Christmas, so asks Ed if he’ll feed the Brookfield stock Christmas Day, Boxing Day and New Years Day.
All paid, at holiday rates.
Good lad, David.
I don’t suppose Brookfield is that flush for cash right now, but even they can spare a few coppers in a way that lets Ed keep his pride.
Now that’s the Christmas spirit!
Ed’s pride is a bit dull
David buys Ed a pint.
He asks him how much he pays for fertiliser and concentrates.
David thinks they could save on both if Brookfield and Grange farms combined their orders.
Eh?
David gives Ed work over the festive time … obviously to help Ed, but that’s not charity.
David buys Ed a pint … Ed’s unlikely to be able to buy a pint back, but that’s not charity.
David suggests a plan that will save both their farms money … that’s charity?
Methinks Ed isn’t exactly thinking straight.
- Mike’s not impressed by Keith Horrobin’s sentence
- Jamie’s good with a chipper
- Matt takes Lilian shopping
- Mike and Vicky learn how to bathe a doll
- All in a name
- David’s time off is good news for Ed
- Ed’s pride is a bit dull
Mike’s not impressed by Keith Horrobin’s sentence
(if you don’t listen to Ambridge Extra – Keith Horrobin was sentenced to 4 years yesterday. All Ambridge Extra blog posts can be found here: http://ponderingthearchers.blogspot.co.uk/search/label/ambridge%20extra)
He thinks 4 years wasn’t enough.
Ed concurs, though David (one of the direct victims) thinks it’s a good and proper sentence.
[David] “Even if he does get out in two years, I’d say justice was done and Ruth feels the same. And I hope Emma feels it was worth it.”
Jamie’s good with a chipper
Reckons Mike.
He and Jamie have to spread the chippings on Home Farm land so that the shooters don’t get much on their gaiters.
(Why have gaiters if you can’t cope with mud?!?)
Matt takes Lilian shopping
Matt’s stepping up his ‘good guy’ routine.
First, he’s been cosying up to James.
Now he’s taken time off of work (!) to take Lilian shopping for the afternoon, and promises not to complain while Lilian has a proper browse (!!).
Lilian doesn’t really sound that excited about shopping with Matt.
Matt has to work very hard to convince her to buy a very expensive coat that she showed a liking for. Which isn’t very Lilian-like.
And when Vicky and Mike stumble upon her and Matt (while Lilian is still trying the expensive coast):
[Lilian] “I don’t know. I can’t seem to decide. Perhaps I need some space to decide.”
And then Lilian suggests they just wait for the sales … not Lilian type behaviour at all.
She obviously only has thoughts of her Paul …
Mike and Vicky learn how to bathe a doll
Did Mike really do absolutely nothing when Brenda and Roy were wee?
Seems so.
All in a name
Vicky likes Bethany, Angela, Claire and Daisy.
So far.
I’m sure it’ll change a few times …
Mike wasn’t too keen on Daisy (though I don’t suppose he’ll actually have much say):
[Mike] “Sounds a bit like a cow to me.”
David’s time off is good news for Ed
David asks Ed for a ‘favour’. He wants to take some proper time off over Christmas, so asks Ed if he’ll feed the Brookfield stock Christmas Day, Boxing Day and New Years Day.
All paid, at holiday rates.
[David] “I know it’s a lot to ask, but it would make a heck of a difference to us.”
Good lad, David.
I don’t suppose Brookfield is that flush for cash right now, but even they can spare a few coppers in a way that lets Ed keep his pride.
Now that’s the Christmas spirit!
Ed’s pride is a bit dull
David buys Ed a pint.
He asks him how much he pays for fertiliser and concentrates.
David thinks they could save on both if Brookfield and Grange farms combined their orders.
[Ed] “I appreciate this David, but I’m not looking for charity.”
Eh?
David gives Ed work over the festive time … obviously to help Ed, but that’s not charity.
David buys Ed a pint … Ed’s unlikely to be able to buy a pint back, but that’s not charity.
David suggests a plan that will save both their farms money … that’s charity?
Methinks Ed isn’t exactly thinking straight.
Keith Horrobin is sentenced: Tues 04.12.12 #ambridgeextra
Ambridge Extra Tuesday 4th December 2012
Here we go again!
Welcome back Ambridge Extra … we hope it’s a welcome we’re authentic about after hearing it …
Donna thinks Keith will be coming home
Donna’s even got “jungle red” nail varnish on.
(it’s the first time we’ve heard Keith’s wife Donna speak. She sounds a bit of a simpering fool)
Seems everyone is hoping the psychological report of Keith will help reduce his sentence.
Tracey still hasn't forgiven Emma
Though Tracey does seem to have finally accepted that Keith is guilty as charged.
But that doesn’t change what she think of Emma.
Did Emma need stitches?
She cut herself on something before rushing off to court.
Kirsty though it needed stitches.
But Emma didn’t mention the cut again.
Odd of them to both mention it in the first place …
Keith gets 4 years
Though Keith has been a good lad since he was arrested, including pleading guilty and giving the names of the gang to the police, the judge can't ignore that he puts folks life in danger. Including George.
(guess Tracey won't be winning any 'best great aunty awards anysitm soon!)
Keith gets 4 years, 2 in prison, two on licence.
Tracey spots Emma:
Tracey Vs Emma
Emma doesn't think 4 years is enough, considering. Even she reckons Keith was cajoled.
Tracey blames Emma for Keith bing sentenced to 4 years. Emma blames Tracey and Keith for the now obviously distraught Donna.
When Emma tells Tracey she thinks Keith didn't get long enough:
Indeed not! He'll be sharing a room, and onc they find out he's a grass ...
Tracey gets drunk
At Jaxx, bending poor Kirsty's ear.
Tracey is disgusted that Susan wasn't at the sentencing. She feels very alone, trying to deal with Keith and Donna, while living with and looking after her dad and Gary.
Quite!
Donna gets taken for a fool
Tracey gets home, alone (apart from their dog Poochy) to find that her and Keith's mortgage i 2 months behind.
Bu fortune is smiling on her. A nice chap calls round, saying her's from nan Independent Financial Company ...
...he'd been round earlier on when Donna was out, reckoning this would be a good place to start "borrowing".
Sounds Like a loan shark, but I don't suppose Donna would have the sense to spot that.
- Here we go again!
- Donna thinks Keith will be coming home
- Tracey still hasn't forgiven Emma
- Did Emma need stitches?
- Keith gets 4 years
- Tracey Vs Emma
- Tracey gets drunk
- Donna gets taken for a fool
Here we go again!
Welcome back Ambridge Extra … we hope it’s a welcome we’re authentic about after hearing it …
Donna thinks Keith will be coming home
[Tracey] “There’s an awful lot of party food in the fridge Donna, you don’t think he’s going to …”
Donna’s even got “jungle red” nail varnish on.
(it’s the first time we’ve heard Keith’s wife Donna speak. She sounds a bit of a simpering fool)
Seems everyone is hoping the psychological report of Keith will help reduce his sentence.
[Tracey] “You shouldn’t get your hopes up. You don’t get off for arson.”
Tracey still hasn't forgiven Emma
Though Tracey does seem to have finally accepted that Keith is guilty as charged.
[Tracey] “He really did it. You think you know someone …”
But that doesn’t change what she think of Emma.
[Tracey] “You never shop family, something that Emma should remember.”
Did Emma need stitches?
She cut herself on something before rushing off to court.
Kirsty though it needed stitches.
But Emma didn’t mention the cut again.
Odd of them to both mention it in the first place …
Keith gets 4 years
Though Keith has been a good lad since he was arrested, including pleading guilty and giving the names of the gang to the police, the judge can't ignore that he puts folks life in danger. Including George.
[Tracey] "What’s going on about George for? He’s alright."
(guess Tracey won't be winning any 'best great aunty awards anysitm soon!)
Keith gets 4 years, 2 in prison, two on licence.
Tracey spots Emma:
[Tracey] "She’s got something to do with this"
Tracey Vs Emma
[Emma] "Uncle Keith was always such a simple bloke, and now this"
Emma doesn't think 4 years is enough, considering. Even she reckons Keith was cajoled.
[Emma] "Then again it is Keith. Stupid Keith. He’s just so gullible"
[Tracey] "Oh. You., Emma flipping Grundy."
Tracey blames Emma for Keith bing sentenced to 4 years. Emma blames Tracey and Keith for the now obviously distraught Donna.
[Emma] "Donna is owed an apology. By Keith, and you"
When Emma tells Tracey she thinks Keith didn't get long enough:
[Tracey] "Do you think he’s going to be tucked up in a comfy cell on his own, with his teddy and his pyjamas?"
Indeed not! He'll be sharing a room, and onc they find out he's a grass ...
[Tracey] "They're going to give him a big welcome … "
[Emma] "You’re a classic Horrobin, just so convinced that your actions are the right ones, that you know best all the time. All I can say is thank god I'm Grundy."
Tracey gets drunk
At Jaxx, bending poor Kirsty's ear.
Tracey is disgusted that Susan wasn't at the sentencing. She feels very alone, trying to deal with Keith and Donna, while living with and looking after her dad and Gary.
[Tracey] "I should go. You don’t want some sad woman at your bar"
Quite!
Donna gets taken for a fool
Tracey gets home, alone (apart from their dog Poochy) to find that her and Keith's mortgage i 2 months behind.
Bu fortune is smiling on her. A nice chap calls round, saying her's from nan Independent Financial Company ...
...he'd been round earlier on when Donna was out, reckoning this would be a good place to start "borrowing".
Sounds Like a loan shark, but I don't suppose Donna would have the sense to spot that.
Friday, 19 October 2012
James in hospital: Thurs 18.10.12
The Archers Thursday 18th October 2012
Keith hasn’t been sentenced
Goodness, I’d forgotten about Keith.
They’re doing a pre-sentence and psychiatrist report before he’s sentenced.
Steady on Jennifer.
I wouldn’t be too quick to laugh at him … his is family, after all.
Joyce will be home soon
Which is nice. Though sounds like Lilian will miss her one-on-one chats with Arthur.
James has been in an accident
Lilian get a call to say James has been in a car crash.
She rushes off to the hospital, but can’t get through to Matt (I think he was off on a lads’ night out?).
Though it seems James isn’t too badly hurt. He has a leg injury that may require an operation.
Lilian still can’t get Matt. She also can’t get through to Jennifer.
So who does she call next?
Tony?
No.
Adam?
Nope.
Jolene?
Indeed not.
When Lilian does finally manage to get Matt to answer his phone, he’s very untroubled and unconcerned that James is hurt. He’s more interested in staying at his lads’ do.
Lilian tries to tell him that she just needs him there, to be there with her. So that she isn’t alone.
So, Lilian calls Paul (of course).
Now I know Matt can be an arse in any situation, but it’s really very odd that he’s not even faking concern about James, just to keep Lilian happy.
Very strange that he made the effort to take Lilian to Paris (trying to sweeten her now that Paul is back around), but now is completely disinterested.
That’ll make things far easier for his half-brother to steal away Matt’s Puss …
An all-male shortlist … the thrill!
Brian’s got the shortlist for the Super Dairy manager down to five.
Though he wants a chap called Rob Titchener to take the job. But Rob needs to talk to his wife first, which annoys Brian.
Not sure why we’re spending so much time listening in on Brian’s staffing issues.
Brian needs punched!
(once again!)
Jennifer’s a tad excitable. She’s waiting to hear from Alice – who, if she has passed her degree, will also get a job that’s been offered to her.
But no degree, no job.
Brian’s decreed they’re going out to eat, because Jennifer is so excitable, and he’s also stressed about whether Rob will take the job.
BUT, Brian also decreed that Jennifer would have to leave her mobile at home, while he can take his. Brian’s theory is that Jennifer wouldn’t be able to stop checking it, but wouldn’t be able to do anything about whether Alice has/hasn’t got the job. So, that can wait. In complete contrast to Brian, who needs his phone to be able to sort out the Super Dairy manager position. Something he can control.
When They got home after their meal, Alice has been trying to call to say she’d passed, and got the job. And, of course, Lilian had been trying to get through about James.
I don’t know why Jennifer lets Brian boss her about like that.
- Keith hasn’t been sentenced
- Joyce will be home soon
- James has been in an accident
- An all-male shortlist … the thrill!
- Brian needs punched!
Keith hasn’t been sentenced
Goodness, I’d forgotten about Keith.
They’re doing a pre-sentence and psychiatrist report before he’s sentenced.
[Jennifer] “Psychiatric … wonder what that will come up with!”
Steady on Jennifer.
I wouldn’t be too quick to laugh at him … his is family, after all.
Joyce will be home soon
Which is nice. Though sounds like Lilian will miss her one-on-one chats with Arthur.
James has been in an accident
Lilian get a call to say James has been in a car crash.
She rushes off to the hospital, but can’t get through to Matt (I think he was off on a lads’ night out?).
Though it seems James isn’t too badly hurt. He has a leg injury that may require an operation.
[Lilian] “I might need to nip outside, I need to have a … make a phone call.”
Lilian still can’t get Matt. She also can’t get through to Jennifer.
So who does she call next?
Tony?
No.
Adam?
Nope.
Jolene?
Indeed not.
When Lilian does finally manage to get Matt to answer his phone, he’s very untroubled and unconcerned that James is hurt. He’s more interested in staying at his lads’ do.
[Matt] “Give you a ring when it wraps up, and if you’re still stuck there, I’ll come and find you … there’s nothing I can do there, I’m not a doctor.”
Lilian tries to tell him that she just needs him there, to be there with her. So that she isn’t alone.
[Matt] “I better go. It’s the cigar break.”
[Lilian] “You ba …. !!!”
So, Lilian calls Paul (of course).
Now I know Matt can be an arse in any situation, but it’s really very odd that he’s not even faking concern about James, just to keep Lilian happy.
Very strange that he made the effort to take Lilian to Paris (trying to sweeten her now that Paul is back around), but now is completely disinterested.
That’ll make things far easier for his half-brother to steal away Matt’s Puss …
An all-male shortlist … the thrill!
Brian’s got the shortlist for the Super Dairy manager down to five.
Though he wants a chap called Rob Titchener to take the job. But Rob needs to talk to his wife first, which annoys Brian.
[Jennifer] “That’s rich coming from you, I’m not always the first person you tell about your businesses decisions, quite the reverse, or even your personal ones for that matter.”
Not sure why we’re spending so much time listening in on Brian’s staffing issues.
Brian needs punched!
(once again!)
Jennifer’s a tad excitable. She’s waiting to hear from Alice – who, if she has passed her degree, will also get a job that’s been offered to her.
But no degree, no job.
Brian’s decreed they’re going out to eat, because Jennifer is so excitable, and he’s also stressed about whether Rob will take the job.
BUT, Brian also decreed that Jennifer would have to leave her mobile at home, while he can take his. Brian’s theory is that Jennifer wouldn’t be able to stop checking it, but wouldn’t be able to do anything about whether Alice has/hasn’t got the job. So, that can wait. In complete contrast to Brian, who needs his phone to be able to sort out the Super Dairy manager position. Something he can control.
[Jennifer] “What about mum?”
[Brian] “What crises? That she can’t find her reading glasses!”
When They got home after their meal, Alice has been trying to call to say she’d passed, and got the job. And, of course, Lilian had been trying to get through about James.
I don’t know why Jennifer lets Brian boss her about like that.
Sunday, 26 August 2012
Ifty didn’t fancy Tracey because of Keith: Tues 21.08.12
(aye, right then!)
The Archers Tuesday 21st August 2012
Susan won’t go to court
Keith was up at the magistrates today.
Susan says she can’t (won’t) go.
Even when it’s misplaced, eh Tracey?
And I’m not remotely surprised Susan won’t go.
Aside from Keith having been a very bad lad, court must also bring back painful memories of her own incarceration …
When Tracey later crosses paths with Emma:
*sigh*
Anyhoo, Keith is committed for trial at the Crown Court. Though he’s been bailed, he can’t go anywhere near Ambridge.
Kathy wishes she had Jamie’s social life
Eh?
I couldn’t imagine anything worse.
Kathy really needs to get out more (and with folks of her own generation).
Tracey really is demented
She thinks that she’s sacrificed her future happiness with Ifty by standing up for bother Keith.
What a strange, stranger family.
Sick cows will be the ruin of Emma and Ed
The vet bills are crippling Ed and Emma. It couldn’t have come at a worse time, what with milk prices.
They had to cancel George going on a school trip as they couldn’t afford it. And Keira needs new shoes, which is also well beyond their means.
Susan brings them round some chicken pies, and wants to take Emma out shopping Saturday morning and to buy Keira’s shoes for them.
Rosa’s on a boy hunt
She really, really does like Jamie.
Rosa calls and leaves him a voice message. She says she’s been thinking about his since the party.
She then goes round to see if Jamie is home. But it’s only Kathy.
Rosa tells Kathy that Jamie’s split up with Natalie (Kathy didn’t know), and what Jamie had told her was his exams results (better than he actually got, which Kathy didn’t know. She knew the real results).
Not sure if Rosa was stirring, or genuinely didn’t realise she was dropping Jamie in it.
But she then dropped herself in it by telling Kathy that she’s told Jamie exams don’t matter.
Kathy didn’t appreciate that. Maybe Rosa’s scooter won’t be enough to make her decent daughter-in-law material after all.
Brookfield’s back to ‘normal’
She’s talking to Emma about the relief that it would seem the gang nightmare is over.
Ach well. Emma doesn’t need aunts and uncles like Tracey and Keith in her life, I reckon.
The Archers Tuesday 21st August 2012
- Susan won’t go to court
- Kathy wishes she had Jamie’s social life
- Tracey really is demented
- Sick cows will be the ruin of Emma and Ed
- Rosa’s on a boy hunt
- Brookfield’s back to ‘normal’
Susan won’t go to court
Keith was up at the magistrates today.
[Emma] “I don’t know what will happen, and I can’t say I’m bothered.”
Susan says she can’t (won’t) go.
[Tracey] “You really don’t care don’t you. Never mind he’s your bother, never mind that he risked his skin to grass up his mates.”
[Susan] “So he could try and get off with a lighter sentence!”
[Tracey] “So that he could try and get some kind of justice. He did the right thing in the end.”
[Susan] “You know where I stand … I;m not coming.”
[Tracey] “When he’s lucky one of us still knows the meaning of family loyalty.”
Even when it’s misplaced, eh Tracey?
And I’m not remotely surprised Susan won’t go.
Aside from Keith having been a very bad lad, court must also bring back painful memories of her own incarceration …
When Tracey later crosses paths with Emma:
[Tracey] “You! I’ve got nothing to say to you. This is all your fault, I hope you’re satisfied.”
*sigh*
Anyhoo, Keith is committed for trial at the Crown Court. Though he’s been bailed, he can’t go anywhere near Ambridge.
Kathy wishes she had Jamie’s social life
Eh?
I couldn’t imagine anything worse.
Kathy really needs to get out more (and with folks of her own generation).
Tracey really is demented
She thinks that she’s sacrificed her future happiness with Ifty by standing up for bother Keith.
[Tracey] “Ifty … me and Ifty. It’s finished. It’s all over between us.”
[Susan] “Tracey what are you on about? … what do you mean all over, nothing’s happened? … I knew you were after him of course, you made that pretty obvious …”
[Tracey] “My big chance. For once in my life I’d met a nice decent bloke, and now it’s finished. All because of Keith.”
[Susan] “Hold on, are you telling me, you and him … did he even go out with you? No he didn’t!”
[Tracey] “I reckon Ifty won’t have nothing to do with me cause my brother’s a crook … can’t see why else …”
[Susan, starting to lose her common sense when she thinks someone is demeaning her family] “He thinks your family isn’t good enough for him! … Well I;m sorry, but I can’t say I;m too surprised.”
[Tracey] “Yeah, you must he happy now, you never liked him from the start.”
[Susan] “Just leave it Tracey.”
What a strange, stranger family.
Sick cows will be the ruin of Emma and Ed
The vet bills are crippling Ed and Emma. It couldn’t have come at a worse time, what with milk prices.
[Emma] “I don’t know how we’re going to manage mum. Mike’s not giving us much for our milk.”
They had to cancel George going on a school trip as they couldn’t afford it. And Keira needs new shoes, which is also well beyond their means.
Susan brings them round some chicken pies, and wants to take Emma out shopping Saturday morning and to buy Keira’s shoes for them.
[Susan] “I feel like I owe you, after everything.”
Rosa’s on a boy hunt
She really, really does like Jamie.
Rosa calls and leaves him a voice message. She says she’s been thinking about his since the party.
[Rosa] “Be nice to meet up again sometime?”
She then goes round to see if Jamie is home. But it’s only Kathy.
Rosa tells Kathy that Jamie’s split up with Natalie (Kathy didn’t know), and what Jamie had told her was his exams results (better than he actually got, which Kathy didn’t know. She knew the real results).
Not sure if Rosa was stirring, or genuinely didn’t realise she was dropping Jamie in it.
But she then dropped herself in it by telling Kathy that she’s told Jamie exams don’t matter.
Kathy didn’t appreciate that. Maybe Rosa’s scooter won’t be enough to make her decent daughter-in-law material after all.
Brookfield’s back to ‘normal’
[Ruth] “Job satisfaction all round … nice to get back to some real old fashioned farming again. Calving, the weather …”
She’s talking to Emma about the relief that it would seem the gang nightmare is over.
[Ruth] “We won’t forget what you did for us, or what it’s cost you.”
Ach well. Emma doesn’t need aunts and uncles like Tracey and Keith in her life, I reckon.
Saturday, 11 August 2012
Adam’s not at home: Fri 03.08.12
The Archers Friday 3rd August 2012
Ruth is serenading her ‘girls’
Singing alone with Adele.
Wish she wouldn’t.
What an awful voice!
Eddie’s fame spreads
Seems his PR coup has also brought him some sales.
Crafty wee so and so!
Ian and Adam have a barney prt 2
Ian tells Adam about his chat with Brian.
Later on:
Adam reckons that might be so, but they’ve made it impossible for him to stay.
And Ian is most annoyed that Adam has asked him for an opinion at all. Not once. Which is rather like Brian not consulting Adam …
Ian loves Ambridge. His job. His boss. His friends. Being part of the community.
When Ian happens to mention what might happen to Adam’s inheritance if he leaves:
Ian tells Adam that he’s only got what he has because of Brian.
Ouch. String stuff from both.
When Ian later gets home, Adam isn’t there.
Ominous …
It’s raining
Bout time too!
Not that I’d wish it on anyone, but Ambridge did seem to have escaped the horrific summer that the rest of us have been having. Seems not so. They’ve had it as bad as the rest of us (they just never really mentioned it before, which is odd for a Brit).
But it’s bad news for the harvest, which is another problem Adam doesn’t need.
It’s too late for the bees
Aw!
Seems the sun has come too late, so the bees won’t be a strong bunch this year.
Well, that’s okay then.
(!)
Keith’s a clype
The Police have arrested three more members of the gang, which David reckons means they must have the whole gang now.
Won’t that mean Keith’s going to have a hellish time in prison?
And The Horrobins might start getting nasty phone calls?!?
Olympics, grans and sex on the beach
Well, the Olympics does bring out the random sports that we all become riveted. Quite normal, really.
It gets worse for Josh. Not only is he not allowed to watch the telly (they are about to sit down and eat), he’s getting fish and chips for tea. Normally That would be marvellous, but it’s home cooked. By Ruth.
And back onto the Olympics – mind that Alistair had got himself, Shula and Daniel tickets in the lottery? Well they’re off now, to watch the riding.
Then Pip starts texting Josh with pictures from her holiday – sun, sand and …
(*snort*)
Poor Josh. All he got was a few days with Ruth’s mum.
David breaks out the wine
With the fish and chips.
He wants to celebrate that they can get back to ‘normal’ since the gang have all been arrested.
But, as David also said, there’s still the trial to get through …
- Ruth is serenading her ‘girls’
- Eddie’s fame spreads
- Ian and Adam have a barney prt 2
- It’s raining
- It’s too late for the bees
- Keith’s a clype
- Olympics, grans and sex on the beach
- David breaks out the wine
Ruth is serenading her ‘girls’
Singing alone with Adele.
Wish she wouldn’t.
What an awful voice!
Eddie’s fame spreads
[David] “He’s a sculpturer with a growing reputation, don’t know if he’ll lower himself to driving a corn trailer!”
Seems his PR coup has also brought him some sales.
Crafty wee so and so!
Ian and Adam have a barney prt 2
Ian tells Adam about his chat with Brian.
[Adam] “So you’re all ganging up on me now!”
Later on:
[Ian] “He wants you to stay at Home Farm.”
Adam reckons that might be so, but they’ve made it impossible for him to stay.
[Ian] “You’ve lost the argument, it’s going ahead … your previous principles … what about all your other arable crops you’ve grown over the years … just because you don’t approve of this one case .. .you;re going to jeopardise our entire life!”
And Ian is most annoyed that Adam has asked him for an opinion at all. Not once. Which is rather like Brian not consulting Adam …
[Ian] “You might like to think of the consequences of your actions then … all this talk about moving away, have you thought about what you’d be giving up. Have you thought about what I’d be giving up … and look what I’d lose if we did.”
Ian loves Ambridge. His job. His boss. His friends. Being part of the community.
[Ian] “We’re accepted here.”
When Ian happens to mention what might happen to Adam’s inheritance if he leaves:
[Adam] “Ah, I get it. That’s what this is about … my inheritance. Your chance, one day, of opening your own place!”
[Ian, beyond fury] “How dare you. How can you say that. I don’t give a damn about your inheritance for me. I care about you going nuclear and abandoning everything that’s good in our life. And before you start pointing the finger at my motivation, maybe you should take a close look at yourself. I am sick to death of you playing Mr morale high and mighty, Brian and Debbie aren’t monsters, they’re not trying to poison people, they’re just trying to produce milk in a way that gives the farmer a decent wage when practically no one else in the country can do it … and honestly if I hear one more word about how fulfilling and uplifting your time in Africa was, I think I’ll break something. You go bleating on …”
Ian tells Adam that he’s only got what he has because of Brian.
[Adam] “I’m paying the mortgage!”
[Ian] “We’re paying the mortgage!!! … For all your talk about Africa, since you came back, have you followed up any of the work you did out there?”
[Adam] “I kept in touch.”
[Ian] “Rubbish. You’re nothing but a hypocrite.”
Ouch. String stuff from both.
When Ian later gets home, Adam isn’t there.
Ominous …
It’s raining
Bout time too!
Not that I’d wish it on anyone, but Ambridge did seem to have escaped the horrific summer that the rest of us have been having. Seems not so. They’ve had it as bad as the rest of us (they just never really mentioned it before, which is odd for a Brit).
But it’s bad news for the harvest, which is another problem Adam doesn’t need.
[Ruth] “And don’t you worry. You will get it in. Always do.”
It’s too late for the bees
Aw!
Seems the sun has come too late, so the bees won’t be a strong bunch this year.
[Ruth] “But Josh liked his new bee suit. And at least his new one has room for him to grow.”
Well, that’s okay then.
(!)
Keith’s a clype
The Police have arrested three more members of the gang, which David reckons means they must have the whole gang now.
[David] “So, presumably, Keith must have coughed the lot.”
Won’t that mean Keith’s going to have a hellish time in prison?
And The Horrobins might start getting nasty phone calls?!?
Olympics, grans and sex on the beach
[Josh] “I wanted to watch the trampolining”
[Ruth] “Since when have you watched trampolining?”
Well, the Olympics does bring out the random sports that we all become riveted. Quite normal, really.
It gets worse for Josh. Not only is he not allowed to watch the telly (they are about to sit down and eat), he’s getting fish and chips for tea. Normally That would be marvellous, but it’s home cooked. By Ruth.
And back onto the Olympics – mind that Alistair had got himself, Shula and Daniel tickets in the lottery? Well they’re off now, to watch the riding.
[David] “Shula can barely contain herself. Alistair must be one popular guy in that household.”
Then Pip starts texting Josh with pictures from her holiday – sun, sand and …
[Josh] “It’s not fair. Daniel gets to go to London. Pip’s having sex on the beach …”
[David] “What? Let me see that photo!”
[Ruth] “He means the cocktails”
(*snort*)
Poor Josh. All he got was a few days with Ruth’s mum.
David breaks out the wine
With the fish and chips.
He wants to celebrate that they can get back to ‘normal’ since the gang have all been arrested.
But, as David also said, there’s still the trial to get through …
Friday, 10 August 2012
Keith admits he’s the firestarter: Wed 01.08.12
The Archers Wednesday 1st August 2012
Keith’s guilty, but it’s all Emma’s fault
According to Tracey …
Tracey called Susan to tell her Keith’s been charged. Just so happened Emma was there at the time (buying an electricity card. That £30 won’t get her very far).
Tracey goes round to see Keith.
Seems so. Though Keith had to report back to the Police regularly, and must stay away from Ambridge. The case will go to the Magistrates, then probably onto the Crown Court. Which could take a while.
Keith admits he did. Forensics caught him.
Indeed they are. Though Keith reckons he wasn’t “directly involved”. All he did was tell them about Adam’s forage harvester.
Then, when David could identify the blokes who attacked Adam:
Keith reckons he had nothing to do with the phone calls. Or letting the cows out.
Keith reckons the blokes were pressuring him to have a turn. That they knew enough about him to get him into serious trouble at work, and with the Police.
BUT Keith is refusing to name these other bad blokes.
When Tracey tells Susan that Keith did do it:
Emma comes in. Susan tells her Keith’s admitted it:
When Emma leaves the room:
What a load of rubbish, Tracey.
Can believe it, but I’m squarely on Emma’s side this time. She did absolutely the right thing.
Jennifer compares Brian to Stalin
Quite right too.
Brian won the tender for supplying the arable to the Super Dairy (after a scintillating BL meeting …).
Annabelle asked Brian about the Adam ‘situation’.
Jennifer wasn’t remotely happy to hear that Brian had ‘won’. It means next to no land for Adam to farm.
I’m with Adam.
Sod it, move on, and get rid of having to bow to Brian.
Even Jennifer sounds increasing fed up with Brian.
Son or husband?!?
Even Jennifer can't afford stamps
She was going to buy 40 first class, but went for 20 first and 20 second instead.
Must be so if Jennifer has noticed.
Jennifer likes a bit of Alan Bates
(there was a lot of Jennifer today)
Jennifer was very impressed by Lynda’s cultural Olympiad. Especially the poetry reading.
Fallon’s van went by
Seems now on their way to Edinburgh.
Sounded very noisy!
- Keith’s guilty, but it’s all Emma’s fault
- Jennifer compares Brian to Stalin
- Even Jennifer can't afford stamps
- Jennifer likes a bit of Alan Bates
- Fallon’s van went by
Keith’s guilty, but it’s all Emma’s fault
According to Tracey …
Tracey called Susan to tell her Keith’s been charged. Just so happened Emma was there at the time (buying an electricity card. That £30 won’t get her very far).
[Emma] “So, it looks like he really did do it.”
[Susan] “You can’t know that. Lord alone knows what state he must be in.”
[Emma] “I’m so sorry it’s worked out like this. I didn’t want to be right.”
[Susan] “None of us wanted you to be right Emma.”
Tracey goes round to see Keith.
[Tracey] “What you been charged with?”
[Keith] “Arson. Criminal damage. Conspiracy.”
[Tracey] “Blimey. But they let you out again?”
Seems so. Though Keith had to report back to the Police regularly, and must stay away from Ambridge. The case will go to the Magistrates, then probably onto the Crown Court. Which could take a while.
[Keith] “It’ll be quicker if I plead guilty.”
[Tracey] “Guilty? Why would you do that? You didn’t do it … Keith …”
Keith admits he did. Forensics caught him.
[Tracey] “I just can’t believe it. Petrol bombing a farm.”
[Keith] “It weren’t a petrol bomb, I just …”
[Tracey] “I don’t care how you did it. What am I going to say to people … I’ve been defining you all round the village … how can you be so stupid, you’ve got it sorted. Good job. Nice house, what got into you Keith?”
[Keith] “It’s all front. The motor trade’s been rubbish for ages. I’ve got a massive mortgage on the place. I’m scared to think how many credit cards I’ve got, and they’re all up to the limit. And then this wedding came along. What could I do …?”
[Tracey] “Alright, so you’re skint. How does burning down a barn help that?”
[Keith] “There are some blokes. I knew one of them from way back … it started with the odd dodgy car … cause I know the area and I get about, I let them know if there was any kit that looks like an easy target … tractors, quad bikes … it was easy money. And all this stuff’s insured, no-one was supposed to get hurt.”
[Tracey] “These blokes, are you saying they were the ones what lamped Adam Macy?”
Indeed they are. Though Keith reckons he wasn’t “directly involved”. All he did was tell them about Adam’s forage harvester.
Then, when David could identify the blokes who attacked Adam:
[Keith] “We, they, the others, wanted to persuade him not to give evidence.”
Keith reckons he had nothing to do with the phone calls. Or letting the cows out.
[Keith] “I just did the fire.”
[Tracey] “Just!”
Keith reckons the blokes were pressuring him to have a turn. That they knew enough about him to get him into serious trouble at work, and with the Police.
[Keith] “I feel terrible. I’ll never forgive myself. I just got in too deep.”
BUT Keith is refusing to name these other bad blokes.
[Tracey] “You don’t have no choice Keith. You’ve got to cooperate. If you don’t, you’re going down forever.”
When Tracey tells Susan that Keith did do it:
[Susan] “I’ve had about just enough of this family.”
[Tracey] “He just got sucked in Susan, he never meant it to go this far.”
[Susan] “I don’t know what I’m going to say to Emma …”
[Tracey] “Her? … it’s Keith you ought to be worried about!”
[Susan] “He’s done a wicked, wicked thing!!!”
Emma comes in. Susan tells her Keith’s admitted it:
[Susan] “I’m really sorry Emma. I shouldn’t have doubted you. I just never thought he would …”
[Emma] “I know. I’m sorry too.”
When Emma leaves the room:
[Susan] “You’re being very unfair to Emma.”
[Tracey] “Whatever she though, she should never have made that phone call.”
[Susan] “He did something wrong.”
[Tracey] “And he’s suffering for it. He’s in bits.”
[Susan] “Yeah, now he’s been caught.”
[Tracey] “I don’t care. You just don’t do that to your own family.”
What a load of rubbish, Tracey.
Can believe it, but I’m squarely on Emma’s side this time. She did absolutely the right thing.
Jennifer compares Brian to Stalin
Quite right too.
Brian won the tender for supplying the arable to the Super Dairy (after a scintillating BL meeting …).
Annabelle asked Brian about the Adam ‘situation’.
[Brian] “It’s a slightly fluid situation at the moment.”
[Annabelle] “So, he’s jumped ship.”
[Brian] “Oh. Not necessarily so. The fat lady hasn’t sung yet.”
Jennifer wasn’t remotely happy to hear that Brian had ‘won’. It means next to no land for Adam to farm.
[Brian] “This has secured the future of the farm.”
[Jennifer] “What about Adam … so you’re writing him out of history, are you Brian, like some Soviet trick that’s fallen out of favour!”
[Brian] “Don’t be ridiculous darling. I’m not Stalin.”
[Jennifer] “Well it’s just that Adam doesn’t fit into your 5 year plan!”
[Brian] “He can if he chooses.”
I’m with Adam.
Sod it, move on, and get rid of having to bow to Brian.
Even Jennifer sounds increasing fed up with Brian.
Son or husband?!?
Even Jennifer can't afford stamps
She was going to buy 40 first class, but went for 20 first and 20 second instead.
[Jennifer] “They’re such a price now, aren’t they?”
Must be so if Jennifer has noticed.
Jennifer likes a bit of Alan Bates
(there was a lot of Jennifer today)
Jennifer was very impressed by Lynda’s cultural Olympiad. Especially the poetry reading.
[Jennifer] “She’s found this chap with a touch of the Alan Bates about him, in Grange Spinney … I could have cheerfully listened to him read the Borchester phone book.”
Fallon’s van went by
Seems now on their way to Edinburgh.
Sounded very noisy!
Monday, 23 July 2012
Tracey is frightfully rude to Emma: Mon 23.07.12
The Archers Monday 23rd July 2012
Tracey pulls her punches
She went for purely verbal assaults instead.
Seems Keith is at home, near suicidal with depression.
Tracey reckons everyone knows Keith is innocent.
When Tracey later goes round to see Emma, to tell her to stop lying.
Blimey. With an Aunt like that …
Fallon and Harry return to go to Edinburgh
How very odd.
We hadn’t heard from Harry nor Fallon for an age.
But up they pop today (right next to the secret microphones).
Harry’s bemoaning that everyone seems to have gone off on holiday. Though Fallon suggests he also heads off for a wee trip to the Milk Bottle Museum, he thinks he’ll just end up taking a holiday to watch the Olympics on telly.
Fallon’s next suggestion:
Harry reckons he’s too skint to even afford that.
Then Fallon remembers she owns a camper van. Big enough for two …
Then they check what’s on:
They want to go somewhere with life, music, culture … so they ask Kenton (!).
He suggest Edinburgh. He once went there with a mate:
(he thankfully didn’t go into details)
So – they’ll be off to The Fringe. (The Fringe still strikes terror into my heart when it’s uttered … I survived 17 years of it as a local)
Well spotted Kenton … Fallon might get her man after all!
Even Susan thinks Emma’s lying
After suffering the tirade from Tracey, Emma goes to tirade at Susan.
Oh – Susan was cheeky to mention George’s paternity!
But she has a point.
Emma’s very good at convincing herself, then convincing everyone else …
- Tracey pulls her punches
- Fallon and Harry return to go to Edinburgh
- Even Susan thinks Emma’s lying
Tracey pulls her punches
She went for purely verbal assaults instead.
[Tracey] “You can knock some sense into that spiteful daughter of yours!”
Seems Keith is at home, near suicidal with depression.
[Susan] “I can’t bear it, my daughter against my brother, what can I do?”
[Tracey] “She’s mad!”
Tracey reckons everyone knows Keith is innocent.
[Tracey] “Everyone knows it expect that vindictive daughter of yours.”
When Tracey later goes round to see Emma, to tell her to stop lying.
[Tracey] “You’ve built up this great big fantasy, it’s you that needs locking up, not Keith … what a spiteful cow you are. Spiteful and malicious!”
Blimey. With an Aunt like that …
Fallon and Harry return to go to Edinburgh
How very odd.
We hadn’t heard from Harry nor Fallon for an age.
But up they pop today (right next to the secret microphones).
Harry’s bemoaning that everyone seems to have gone off on holiday. Though Fallon suggests he also heads off for a wee trip to the Milk Bottle Museum, he thinks he’ll just end up taking a holiday to watch the Olympics on telly.
Fallon’s next suggestion:
[Fallon] “A caravan in West super Mare and a bag full of 10 pence pieces, holiday sorted!”
Harry reckons he’s too skint to even afford that.
Then Fallon remembers she owns a camper van. Big enough for two …
[Harry] “Weston super Mare, here we come!”
Then they check what’s on:
[Harry] “Music and beer fest.”
[Fallon] “No thanks, potbellied blokes holding their pints up to the light … I get enough of that here.”
They want to go somewhere with life, music, culture … so they ask Kenton (!).
He suggest Edinburgh. He once went there with a mate:
[Kenton] “Yeah, and I think we left our mark!”
(he thankfully didn’t go into details)
So – they’ll be off to The Fringe. (The Fringe still strikes terror into my heart when it’s uttered … I survived 17 years of it as a local)
[Kenton] “Hmm Hmmm … you and Harry in a camper van, eh?”
Well spotted Kenton … Fallon might get her man after all!
Even Susan thinks Emma’s lying
After suffering the tirade from Tracey, Emma goes to tirade at Susan.
[Emma] “So, you still haven’t made up your mind, me or Keith?”
[Susan] “You can’t want Keith to go to prison love … It was someone who looked like Keith, maybe … I think you’ve built it up ... and now it’s a cast iron certainty … I know it’s a hard thing to admit, but can’t you accept the possibility that you could have got it wrong … it’s Keith’s future at stake … I’m sure in your heart you don’t want it to be him … the thing is, you’ve been wrong before … you swore blind that Ed was George’s father … you had us all going.”
[Emma] “This is nothing like that,. I saw him mum!”
[Susan] “You saw someone … maybe you just persuaded yourself it was Keith …”
Oh – Susan was cheeky to mention George’s paternity!
But she has a point.
Emma’s very good at convincing herself, then convincing everyone else …
Saturday, 21 July 2012
Lilian’s so naughty: Thurs 19.07.12
The Archers Thursday 19th July 2012
Fete team selection hots up
Which, considering there are no rules for the Fete games, Susan might as well do. And stop complaining.
Keith’s been arrested, Emma unmasked
Tracey bursts into the shop to tell Susan and Emma that the Police have been round again. They’re arrested him this time.
(aye, Susan would know!)
But the deed is done. They know it was Emma who told on Keith.
Emma’s adamant it was Keith. After all, why would he have seemed to guilty at his daughter’s wedding.
(Emma stormed away)
Lilian loves winding up Jennifer
And how!
Ruairi is doing a spot of weeding for Lilian, to earn money to buy a dog statue from Eddie.
Ruairi does know the difference, and asks if he can get 10p a weed.
(sounds expensive to me!)
As Ruairi gets underway, Peggy pops round for coffee. She’s also been approached by Ruairi. He must be desperate to earn his money for something:
When Ruairi is finished, he’s pulled 123 weeds. He tells Lilian and Peggy what he wants the money for. And that not all of his family agree it’s a super statue.
Ruairi says £45, but he bargained him down to £35 (Brian’s told him always to bargain).
So, Lilian tells Ruairi to also oil her front gate. And she’ll round it up to £35.
*big Lilian roar of laughter*
Marvellous!
Love it when Lilian plays rough!
Keith’s been released
Susan went round to see Emma at Rickyard.
Emma explains that she called the Police for her children. She again tells that it was Keith’s behaviour at the wedding which made her sure it was he who’d burnt down the Brookfield barn.
Tracey bursts in (again) to say Keith has been released (though on Police bail). Emma reckons that means they Police have got their suspicions.
Susan and Tracey assert that Emma’s go to remember Keith’s had his bad moments, but he’s nothing like Clive.
(there was a big thump when Tracey said that. Must have been Emma thumping something or other, though surprised she didn’t thump Tracey!)
My word.
That’s a family argument and a half!
Still think it’s all a red herring, though. The more Emma says she’s sure, the less I believe her.
- Fete team selection hots up
- Keith’s been arrested, Emma unmasked
- Lilian loves winding up Jennifer
- Keith’s been released
Fete team selection hots up
[Susan] “Your dad thinks we should open a transfer window … that’s the problem, nothing premier about our team … there’s Sabrina, she’s reasonably athletic I suppose.”
[Emma] “She’s got all the kit anyway.”
[Susan] “But you look at the other people we’ve got to go on. Jim, Jill, Oliver Sterling, Christine. You can see what I’m getting at … if I could go on the transfer market and sign up our Christopher or your Ed.”
Which, considering there are no rules for the Fete games, Susan might as well do. And stop complaining.
Keith’s been arrested, Emma unmasked
Tracey bursts into the shop to tell Susan and Emma that the Police have been round again. They’re arrested him this time.
[Susan] “Sometimes the Police can be totally out of order.”
(aye, Susan would know!)
[Emma] “Well it is a serious crime, people could have died. George.”
[Susan] “But they shouldn’t pick on someone just because of their name.”
[Emma] “Mum, you don’t know if it was because of that!”
[Susan, sensing something is awry] “What do you mean?”
[Emma, sensing Susan sense something is awry] “Nothing.”
[Tracey] “No you don’t, go on.”
[Emma] “Where did he go when he left the bar that night … I wanna know, that’s all … and how did he injure his leg like that?”
[Tracey] “The hamster.”
[Emma] “Oh come on, even you aren’t stupid enough to believe that!”
[Tracey] “It was you, wasn't it!”
[Emma] “No.”
[Susan] “Emma, was it? … oh Emma!”
But the deed is done. They know it was Emma who told on Keith.
[Tracey] “Never mind what you thought you saw, you got it wrong.”
[Emma] “I don’t think so.”
[Tracey] “You must have done, because Keith was never there!”
Emma’s adamant it was Keith. After all, why would he have seemed to guilty at his daughter’s wedding.
[Tracey] “Comes to something when a bit of compassion is a sign of guilt … why are you doing this. Why do you want him put away? … Now that they’ve got a witness, they’ll hammer away at him until he breaks.”
[Emma] “Don’t be silly, it’s not Guantanamo bay.”
[Tracey] “Don’t you joke. They’ll keep on and on at him, and when they’ve broken him, they’ll put him away for years,. And it’ll be all your fault! … I’ll never forgive you Emma Grundy. Do you hear that!”
(Emma stormed away)
Lilian loves winding up Jennifer
And how!
Ruairi is doing a spot of weeding for Lilian, to earn money to buy a dog statue from Eddie.
[Lilian] “The first thing we’ve got to make sure is that you know the difference between a weed and a plant.”
Ruairi does know the difference, and asks if he can get 10p a weed.
(sounds expensive to me!)
As Ruairi gets underway, Peggy pops round for coffee. She’s also been approached by Ruairi. He must be desperate to earn his money for something:
[Peggy] “Whatever it is, Jennifer heartily disapproves … asking me not to be over generous with him.”
[Lilian] “She probably thinks I’m so mean she doesn’t need to bother. I’m intrigued though. I shall make it my business to find out.”
When Ruairi is finished, he’s pulled 123 weeds. He tells Lilian and Peggy what he wants the money for. And that not all of his family agree it’s a super statue.
[Ruairi] “Jennifer doesn’t think so. She told dad it was hideous.”
[Lilian] “Well, we’ll have to see if we can help, won’t we grandma …I can’t think why Jenny didn’t like him!”
[Ruairi] “He’s brilliant!”
[Lilian, chuckling] “If Eddie made him, I’m sure he's a real work of art … If we say 123 at 20 pence each … I think we better adds a £5 bonus on top … well, you found that long lost trowel … what was Eddie quoting?”
Ruairi says £45, but he bargained him down to £35 (Brian’s told him always to bargain).
So, Lilian tells Ruairi to also oil her front gate. And she’ll round it up to £35.
[Lilian] “In the meantime, why don’t you phone Eddie and get tour order in … but first, I’d insist he install it in your garden,. On a little plinth.”
[Peggy] “Lilian. You are naughty. That’s a fortune!”
[Lilian] “I know, but what price happiness, eh?”
[Peggy] “Poor Jennifer’s going to be in for a surprise.”
[Lilian] “You know, I’d give anything to be there when she sees it!”
*big Lilian roar of laughter*
Marvellous!
Love it when Lilian plays rough!
Keith’s been released
Susan went round to see Emma at Rickyard.
Emma explains that she called the Police for her children. She again tells that it was Keith’s behaviour at the wedding which made her sure it was he who’d burnt down the Brookfield barn.
[Emma] “He was looking really guilty. And on top of that he had a limp … it all adds up.”
[Susan] “Maybe I’d have said something to Keith”
[Emma] “I don’t care, George and Keira, that’s what matters to me. And I thought you’d feel the same.”
Tracey bursts in (again) to say Keith has been released (though on Police bail). Emma reckons that means they Police have got their suspicions.
[Tracey] “Course they’ve got suspicions, he’s a Horrobin!”
Susan and Tracey assert that Emma’s go to remember Keith’s had his bad moments, but he’s nothing like Clive.
[Emma] “Keith’s just weak. If you asks me they’re as bad as each other>”
[Tracey] “Listen to Miss perfect, I don’t think. Quite happy to stitch up her own family, after she’s wrecked her own!”
(there was a big thump when Tracey said that. Must have been Emma thumping something or other, though surprised she didn’t thump Tracey!)
My word.
That’s a family argument and a half!
Still think it’s all a red herring, though. The more Emma says she’s sure, the less I believe her.
Stuck in a ditch: Mon 16.07.12
The Archers Monday 16th July 2012
David’s bad day turns good
David drive his Landrover into a ditch, which the Landrover was hitched to a trailer of lambs.
David is beyond annoyed with himself.
But thankfully, the lambs are okay.
Adam started helping David to get the lambs out, then Mike also joined in. David feeling increasing … ahem … sheepish that he got himself in this spot.
Once they’ve got David organised again, he’s about to head home rather than the market. He thinks he won’t get there in time to sell his lambs. And he was right – he got there five minutes to late. But:
A butcher came along, and bought all of David’s lambs. The butcher had also missed the sale, knew David’s lambs because of Penny Hassett. He gave David a very good price, paid in cash and David didn’t have to pay any commission.
How lovely to hear David being positive. It’s a very rare occurrence.
The price of milk
Mike’s reading his dairy trade newspaper. It doesn’t make for pleasant reading at all.
He’s also losing customers from the milk round. Mike reckons the publicity about the cost of milk has reminded folks they can get their milk cheaper from the supermarkets,
Oh dear.
Wonder if Mike will be at front of the protests.
I thought Vicky was pregnant
Mike was bemoaning that they’d had to leave a restaurant after they’d only just had their starters. Seems Vicky wasn’t feeling well.
So Vicky’s feeling sick. And hasn’t been sleeping.
Knowing how amorous those two are, my first though was that there was going to be another Tucker about to enter the world. Brenda’s face would have been a picture!
Typical Horrobins
All smells like a bit of a red herring …
Communicating with water
Vicky comes across Lynda doing something odd on the bridge. Not sure why anyone is ever surprised to find Lynda doing something odd. It is a fairly common occurrence.
It’s all something to do with the performance art Lynda is organising. The Director seemingly thinks the bridge is a “key performance point”.
But, when Vicky mentions Danish at Grey Gables, Lynda is easily coxed away …
Good god! Lynda and Robert have a sex life!
Terrifying to think it, horribly disturbing to hear it!
Over their Danish, Lynda asks Vicky why she’s trying to cheer herself up. Vicky tells her it’s because she’s been feeling a bit down recently.
Lynda’s already squirming about talking about “all that”, when Vicky mentions that it’s not just the hot flushes that’s worrying her. It’s more intimate issues …
How. Very. Disturbing.
- David’s bad day turns good
- The price of milk
- I thought Vicky was pregnant
- Typical Horrobins
- Communicating with water
- Good god! Lynda and Robert have a sex life!
David’s bad day turns good
David drive his Landrover into a ditch, which the Landrover was hitched to a trailer of lambs.
David is beyond annoyed with himself.
But thankfully, the lambs are okay.
[David] “They’re fine. They’re just a bit confused.”
Adam started helping David to get the lambs out, then Mike also joined in. David feeling increasing … ahem … sheepish that he got himself in this spot.
[David] “It’s just me driving with my mind out of gear.”
Once they’ve got David organised again, he’s about to head home rather than the market. He thinks he won’t get there in time to sell his lambs. And he was right – he got there five minutes to late. But:
[David] “Just as I was beating my head on the concentrate in frustration …”
A butcher came along, and bought all of David’s lambs. The butcher had also missed the sale, knew David’s lambs because of Penny Hassett. He gave David a very good price, paid in cash and David didn’t have to pay any commission.
[Adam] “Great, well I do like a happy ending.”
[David] “When I was driving home, my pocket stuffed with cash, I remember dad saying to me once, when I was about Pip’s age, it’s family farms that make a nation string … I know what he meant though, worth fighting for, isn’t it!”
How lovely to hear David being positive. It’s a very rare occurrence.
The price of milk
Mike’s reading his dairy trade newspaper. It doesn’t make for pleasant reading at all.
[Mike] “More letters from people saying they’ll have to sell up with the price cuts.”
He’s also losing customers from the milk round. Mike reckons the publicity about the cost of milk has reminded folks they can get their milk cheaper from the supermarkets,
[Mike] “Going on about it being a luxury item.”
[Vicky] “We’ll survive.”
Oh dear.
Wonder if Mike will be at front of the protests.
I thought Vicky was pregnant
Mike was bemoaning that they’d had to leave a restaurant after they’d only just had their starters. Seems Vicky wasn’t feeling well.
[Vicky] “I don’t know what’s the matter with me lately.”
So Vicky’s feeling sick. And hasn’t been sleeping.
Knowing how amorous those two are, my first though was that there was going to be another Tucker about to enter the world. Brenda’s face would have been a picture!
Typical Horrobins
[Adam] “So, Keith Horrobin eh … that doesn’t mean he’s innocent. The Horrobins don’t have a good track record, do they.”
[Mike] “What a family, eh … he’s in the frame, obviously … that’s always the hardest. Not knowing.”
All smells like a bit of a red herring …
Communicating with water
Vicky comes across Lynda doing something odd on the bridge. Not sure why anyone is ever surprised to find Lynda doing something odd. It is a fairly common occurrence.
[Vicky] “I thought you might be unwell, hanging onto the parapet like that.”
[Lynda] “No, I’m communing with the bridge.”
[Vicky] “I beg your pardon?”
[Lynda] “I’m trying to communicate with the energy of the place. It’s important to actually touch the stones.”
It’s all something to do with the performance art Lynda is organising. The Director seemingly thinks the bridge is a “key performance point”.
[Lynda] “It’s all to do with the crossover of two energy flows. Human energy, above the bridge, and the eternal fluid below, our communication with the natural world … it’s fascinating.”
[Vicky] “Well, I’ll leave you to it then.”
[Lynda] “Yes, I’ll persevere.”
But, when Vicky mentions Danish at Grey Gables, Lynda is easily coxed away …
Good god! Lynda and Robert have a sex life!
Terrifying to think it, horribly disturbing to hear it!
Over their Danish, Lynda asks Vicky why she’s trying to cheer herself up. Vicky tells her it’s because she’s been feeling a bit down recently.
[Vicky] “Just, age I’m afraid .. I’ve been feeling it though. The usual aches and pains … it’s more mood swings if I’m honest. Hot flushes, that sort of thing. Still, I mustn’t go on. Comes to us all doesn’t it.”
[Lynda] “Well, I remember when I went through all that, but do you know that I can honestly say I’ve had some of my most productive moments since, all that … the creative energy I’ve had for my projects, my shows particularly …I wouldn’t have felt that 20 years ago, I wouldn’t have had the perception.”
Lynda’s already squirming about talking about “all that”, when Vicky mentions that it’s not just the hot flushes that’s worrying her. It’s more intimate issues …
[Lynda] “Ah,. You’re thinking about relations … I really think we’re close now than we’ve ever been … maybe there isn’t quite the fiery passion there used to be. Don’t get me wrong we still have our moments, Robert and I.”
[Vicky] “Really!”
[Lynda] “Quite magical, at times.”
[Vicky] “Only sometimes I catch Mike looking at me like he’s a little boy in a sweet shop, I don’t think I could bear it if all that stopped.”
[Lynda] “I suspect he’ll be coming to the counter for some time yet.”
How. Very. Disturbing.
A Horrobin grasses on a Horrobin: Sun 15.07.12
The Archers Sunday 15th July 2012
Emma phones Crimestoppers
Emma didn’t give her name, so no one will have a clue who ‘shopped’ Keith.
All credit to Emma. She’s generally not one of my favourite Ambridge residents, but she’s come good this time. Couldn’t have been easy.
Price or value?
Annabelle’s obsessions about the arable tender for the Super Dairy continues. (very odd).
Brian seems to be turning from not giving a hoot, to starting to twig that Home farm might not be a shoe-in after all.
Indeed it is. Brian reckons he can go in higher because he (well, Adam) is closer by to be able to deal with anything urgent. Most of the other firms are at least 15 miles away (imagine that! They’d take a whole extra 15 minutes to get there).
So Brian needs Adam to keep a record (and look back two years) to be able to evidence when he has been able to rush out and avert disaster.
Now I’d have though Adam would use this as his opportunity to scupper part of the Super Dairy (if a lesser company did get the contract, maybe they’d screw it up). But, Adam knows Home Farm needs this contract.
So he agrees. Albeit grudgingly.
Annabelle’s amazed at Brian’s persuasion prowess.
(ha!)
Brookfield’s in a state
We didn’t get to hear from David, Ruth or their brood today – but everyone else was saying what a mess the farm is in.
Also a patio table and George’s bike are ruined.
Hmmm. Susan will change her tune soon enough …
Sabrina’s in training for donuts
Susan’s harassing Neil to join a team for the sports at the Fete.
Seems the donut race involved running round the track four times, while putting more clothes on, and eating donuts.
I suppose that makes sense. Burn the calories off before you pile them on (or is she training by eating donuts while she runs?)
The Police came for Keith
Tracey burst into Susan’s while Emma was there to say that the Police had taken Keith that morning.
(well, that’s fair enough really. It usually is a Horrobin that’s to blame)
Later on, Keith turned up, he’d been released without charge.
Keith tried to ask Emma about George, but she responded rather coldly.
Tracey was still ranting about whoever grassed on Keith. She reckons it’s them who want “locking up”. But Keith didn’t want a fuss.
Wonder why …
So they start trying to work out who holds a grudge against Keith.
Oh ho!
I would like to be Emma when Tracey works it out …
- Emma phones Crimestoppers
- Price or value?
- Brookfield’s in a state
- Sabrina’s in training for donuts
- The Police came for Keith
Emma phones Crimestoppers
[Emma] “Well there’s someone you need to investigate … I know he was involved, that’s all I’m saying … it’s Keith Horrobin.”
Emma didn’t give her name, so no one will have a clue who ‘shopped’ Keith.
All credit to Emma. She’s generally not one of my favourite Ambridge residents, but she’s come good this time. Couldn’t have been easy.
Price or value?
Annabelle’s obsessions about the arable tender for the Super Dairy continues. (very odd).
Brian seems to be turning from not giving a hoot, to starting to twig that Home farm might not be a shoe-in after all.
[Brian] “They’re cowboy firms, trying it on, there’s no way they’d make a profit … they see BL as fresh meat, a soft target ripe for the picking.”
[Annabelle] “You’re mixing your metaphors, Brian … So, your line is we’re quite a bit more expensive, but we’ll give you better value for your money?”
Indeed it is. Brian reckons he can go in higher because he (well, Adam) is closer by to be able to deal with anything urgent. Most of the other firms are at least 15 miles away (imagine that! They’d take a whole extra 15 minutes to get there).
So Brian needs Adam to keep a record (and look back two years) to be able to evidence when he has been able to rush out and avert disaster.
Now I’d have though Adam would use this as his opportunity to scupper part of the Super Dairy (if a lesser company did get the contract, maybe they’d screw it up). But, Adam knows Home Farm needs this contract.
So he agrees. Albeit grudgingly.
Annabelle’s amazed at Brian’s persuasion prowess.
[Brian] “Never let the grass grow under my feet.”
[Annabelle] “Or any other forage crop!”
(ha!)
Brookfield’s in a state
We didn’t get to hear from David, Ruth or their brood today – but everyone else was saying what a mess the farm is in.
[Susan] “Bit of a state, is it?”
[Emma] “There’s hardly anything left. Just a few bits of twisted steel.”
Also a patio table and George’s bike are ruined.
[Susan] “Let’s hope the Police get their act together. Personally I’d throw away the key.”
Hmmm. Susan will change her tune soon enough …
Sabrina’s in training for donuts
Susan’s harassing Neil to join a team for the sports at the Fete.
[Susan] “Keeps saying if he plays for anyone at all, it’ll be the cricket team.”
[Emma] “That’d be worth seeing. Dad racing in his sleeping bag.”
[Susan] “What about the other, the dramatic donut race, or whatever it’s called.”
Seems the donut race involved running round the track four times, while putting more clothes on, and eating donuts.
[Susan] “What about Sabrina, she’s already training for it.”
I suppose that makes sense. Burn the calories off before you pile them on (or is she training by eating donuts while she runs?)
The Police came for Keith
Tracey burst into Susan’s while Emma was there to say that the Police had taken Keith that morning.
[Tracey] “They’re trying to do him for the fire … Some snake in the grass, anonymous of course”
[Susan] “Not Keith, that ridiculous, I can’t take this in!”
[Tracey] “Some nutter with a grudge phones up and they take it seriously.”
[Susan] “Especially when his name’s Horrobin.”
(well, that’s fair enough really. It usually is a Horrobin that’s to blame)
Later on, Keith turned up, he’d been released without charge.
[Keith] “Of course they have. They haven’t got a thing on me.”
Keith tried to ask Emma about George, but she responded rather coldly.
Tracey was still ranting about whoever grassed on Keith. She reckons it’s them who want “locking up”. But Keith didn’t want a fuss.
Wonder why …
So they start trying to work out who holds a grudge against Keith.
[Tracey] “Emma, you got any idea?”
Oh ho!
I would like to be Emma when Tracey works it out …
Tuesday, 17 July 2012
Keith’s a firestarter? Fri 13.07.12
The Archers Friday 13th July
Adam wants David to stop
Adam’s brought round some straw for Brookfield, though they’ll have to buy in their own hay. The insurance should cover it, but we all know how long insurance can take …
Adam’s beyond horrified:
But, as David has got to this stage, the Police are now willing to do a bit more for him (it would seem). They’ll have two on duty at Brookfield, plus step-up drive rounds.
So, with that and his cameras and security lights, David feels quite confident he and his family are safe.
Quite!
Churches should provide ashtrays
Ah – Tracey, pure class. Especially at her brother’s daughter’s wedding!
It’s all “petal and powders”. That won’t be the way Tracey will have her do.
Oh good lord!
Tracey would be funny, if she wasn’t verging on being racist.
Ifti’s probably from Oxford.
Keith has a limp …
Oh, does he now?
And he got it falling over a hamster?
Hmmm …
Keith sounds guilty …
You could actually hear Keith turning red at that.
Later on, he was joking with Emma about burnt sausage rolls, after she’d made mention of a fire.
He was horrified to realise that she’d meant the Brookfield one. That she had been there. Keith thought she’d been at Susan’s.
Hmmm …
Keith left early …
From the blokes do at the do. On the night of the fire at Brookfield.
Hmmm …
Jumping to conclusions?
Emma’s putting everything together, and coming up with her uncle Keith as the firestarter.
See – Uncle Keith, the firestarter!
Would seem that could indeed be the case.
I wonder …
Annabelle doesn’t do puddings
But she does do panic, on behalf of Brian. Especially when Brian refuses to panic.
I have no idea why Annabelle does that.
She’s got herself in a tizzy about the arable contract. Seems Annabelle is worried that other BL Board members have been telling other companies to tender.
Brian doesn’t seem bothered. He thinks he and Home Farm can do better price and value.
Actually, must admit I’m not that bothered either …
- Adam wants David to stop
- Churches should provide ashtrays
- Keith has a limp …
- Keith sounds guilty …
- Keith left early …
- Jumping to conclusions?
- Annabelle doesn’t do puddings
Adam wants David to stop
Adam’s brought round some straw for Brookfield, though they’ll have to buy in their own hay. The insurance should cover it, but we all know how long insurance can take …
Adam’s beyond horrified:
[Adam] “I know you said you'd stand firm, but a line's been crossed here, they really mean business, they don’t care about people’s lives ... I couldn't live with myself.”
But, as David has got to this stage, the Police are now willing to do a bit more for him (it would seem). They’ll have two on duty at Brookfield, plus step-up drive rounds.
So, with that and his cameras and security lights, David feels quite confident he and his family are safe.
[Adam] “So, how come you don’t have a barn?”
Quite!
Churches should provide ashtrays
[Tracey] “What are you supposed to do with your fag ends around here?”
[Ed] “I dunno. not smoke in the first place, I suppose.”
[Tracey] “And they wonder why people don’t go to church!”
Ah – Tracey, pure class. Especially at her brother’s daughter’s wedding!
It’s all “petal and powders”. That won’t be the way Tracey will have her do.
[Tracey] “Me and Ifti. When we get hitched. I want us coming in on elephants.”
[Ed] “In Ambridge?”
[Tracey] “In India!”
Oh good lord!
Tracey would be funny, if she wasn’t verging on being racist.
Ifti’s probably from Oxford.
Keith has a limp …
Oh, does he now?
And he got it falling over a hamster?
Hmmm …
Keith sounds guilty …
[Tracey] “I wish mum was here to see it. She'd be so chuffed you’d done good.”
You could actually hear Keith turning red at that.
Later on, he was joking with Emma about burnt sausage rolls, after she’d made mention of a fire.
He was horrified to realise that she’d meant the Brookfield one. That she had been there. Keith thought she’d been at Susan’s.
[Keith] “I’d no idea. So sorry.”
[Emma] “I’ve never been so scared in my life”
[Keith] “I’m so, so sorry. I really am.”
Hmmm …
Keith left early …
From the blokes do at the do. On the night of the fire at Brookfield.
[Tracey] “Can't take your beer, tripping over hamsters!”
Hmmm …
Jumping to conclusions?
Emma’s putting everything together, and coming up with her uncle Keith as the firestarter.
[Emma] “How likely is that .. it could be a convenient excuse ... he kept saying he was sorry, so sorry ... like it was his fault ... it could have been …”
[Ed] “It could have been anyone, it can't be ...”
[Emma] “When you put it all together ...”
See – Uncle Keith, the firestarter!
Would seem that could indeed be the case.
I wonder …
Annabelle doesn’t do puddings
But she does do panic, on behalf of Brian. Especially when Brian refuses to panic.
I have no idea why Annabelle does that.
She’s got herself in a tizzy about the arable contract. Seems Annabelle is worried that other BL Board members have been telling other companies to tender.
Brian doesn’t seem bothered. He thinks he and Home Farm can do better price and value.
Actually, must admit I’m not that bothered either …
Monday, 16 July 2012
The barn’s on fire at Brookfield: Wed 11.07.12
The Archers Wednesday 11th July 2012
We’re going down the pub …
The blokes of Ambridge are having drinks, on Keith Horrobin.
It’s his son-in-law’s (more or less) last night of bachelordom. Not sure why that means his father-in-law-to-be has to pay for the males of the local village to drink and eat all night. But poor Keith seemed to have no choice.
David’s not at the pub
He’s staying in with Ruth, the kids and a DVD.
Eddie offers Neil outside
Eddie’s not very happy with Neil’s alleged sighting of The Ambridge Beast (which happened a wee while ago, and was never mentioned until now, despite Susan being very excited about it indeed). Eddie is insisting Neil never saw a boar.
(Keith makes a quick exit elsewhere. Making jokes about Susan to Neil never goes down well)
Neil won’t back down. It was a boar, he swears. So, Eddie calls Neil outside …
… to show him one of the concrete ornaments he’d made. This one was made out of 3 other ones, which Eddie is going to try and sell as a horrible, evil, Ambridge Beast.
Neil’s was in stitches!
We can hear Neil’s answer through his laughter.
Emma’s up with Keira
Keira’s teething. Just as Emma settles her, and settles herself next to a dozing Ed (who’d come home early from the pub), she notices a light go on at Brookfield.
But it’s only Josh duty his duty to Jeena (the heavily pregnant cow with the slim hips).
Josh is up with Jeena
Seems she’s starting labour. But, there’s something odd.
The barns on fire!
Just as Josh can smell the smoke, the farm’s dogs start barking, and Keira starts crying. That wakes Emma.
She wakes Ed. Then finds that George isn’t in his bed. And then she also spots someone running.
Ed manages to stir, and knocks up David and Ruth.
They rush out. David wants Ed to help him stop the fire before it reaches the chemical store, but George is still missing. Emma’s frantic.
As is Ruth.
Josh also isn’t answering.
We leave Ambridge in the wee hours of the morning, Ruth and Emma shouting for their sons, the sound of fire crackling in the background.
Very reminiscent of the night Grace died. David call of “look out!” had me thinking we might have had another fire fatality in Ambridge …
- We’re going down the pub …
- David’s not at the pub
- Eddie offers Neil outside
- Emma’s up with Keira
- Josh is up with Jeena
- The barns on fire!
We’re going down the pub …
The blokes of Ambridge are having drinks, on Keith Horrobin.
It’s his son-in-law’s (more or less) last night of bachelordom. Not sure why that means his father-in-law-to-be has to pay for the males of the local village to drink and eat all night. But poor Keith seemed to have no choice.
[Neil] “You’re losing a daughter and gaining ...”
[Keith] “ … a whacking great overdraft.”
David’s not at the pub
He’s staying in with Ruth, the kids and a DVD.
[Ruth] “Yeah, cause we usually have such a wild social life.”
Eddie offers Neil outside
Eddie’s not very happy with Neil’s alleged sighting of The Ambridge Beast (which happened a wee while ago, and was never mentioned until now, despite Susan being very excited about it indeed). Eddie is insisting Neil never saw a boar.
[Keith] “If anyone should know a boar when he sees one, it’s Neil!”
[Neil] “Eh?”
(Keith makes a quick exit elsewhere. Making jokes about Susan to Neil never goes down well)
Neil won’t back down. It was a boar, he swears. So, Eddie calls Neil outside …
… to show him one of the concrete ornaments he’d made. This one was made out of 3 other ones, which Eddie is going to try and sell as a horrible, evil, Ambridge Beast.
[Eddie] “So all these talk of boars, you;re killing my trade mate!”
Neil’s was in stitches!
[Eddie] “Have a heart Neil, times are hard … so, you didn’t see no boar, did you?”
We can hear Neil’s answer through his laughter.
Emma’s up with Keira
Keira’s teething. Just as Emma settles her, and settles herself next to a dozing Ed (who’d come home early from the pub), she notices a light go on at Brookfield.
But it’s only Josh duty his duty to Jeena (the heavily pregnant cow with the slim hips).
Josh is up with Jeena
[Josh] “It's alright girl. I’m here. I'll be with you.”
Seems she’s starting labour. But, there’s something odd.
[Josh] “I know you've got other things on your mind Jeena, but can you smell ...”
The barns on fire!
Just as Josh can smell the smoke, the farm’s dogs start barking, and Keira starts crying. That wakes Emma.
[Emma] “Oh my god, the barn is on fire!”
She wakes Ed. Then finds that George isn’t in his bed. And then she also spots someone running.
[Emma] “Hey, you stop!”
Ed manages to stir, and knocks up David and Ruth.
They rush out. David wants Ed to help him stop the fire before it reaches the chemical store, but George is still missing. Emma’s frantic.
As is Ruth.
Josh also isn’t answering.
We leave Ambridge in the wee hours of the morning, Ruth and Emma shouting for their sons, the sound of fire crackling in the background.
Very reminiscent of the night Grace died. David call of “look out!” had me thinking we might have had another fire fatality in Ambridge …
Tuesday, 3 July 2012
Judged by Britain in Bloom: Tues 03.07.12
The Archers Tuesday 3rd July 2012
After all that fuss …
… it was a bit of a slow day in Ambridge.
Shame, really.
Marcia fancies Joe?
So, the great day has arrived.
After all that harassing and demanding, Lynda gets to present Ambridge to the Britain in Bloom judges.
One of who is called Marcia Greeve. The other Douglas (but Douglas doesn’t speak).
It seems to all go fine. She and Jim do the honours.
Well, until Joe and Bartleby clip-clop by to catch Marcia’s eye …
Lynda disentangles them from Joe, only to find Jim steering the judges towards no. 8 The Green. Mind on that this was the only house to not follow the prescribed red, white and blue flower theme. They went yellow …
BUT.
Marcia loved it.
Jim was beside himself with glee with Marcia said that! What a wicked boy he is to Lynda.
They moved onto the Community Orchard.
Where Joe’s waiting to give them a nip of his cider.
(if Joe wasn’t 90, and Marcia sounded in her 30s or 40s, I’d have thought we were about to have an Autumn romance)
After all was said and done:
Though Jim thinks that Marcia liked Joe, and her taking to him was an advantage. Joe certainly thinks so:
Though Joe is more than aware that his ‘help’ wasn’t welcomed by Lynda:
Kenton wants you … but won’t say what for
Seems Kenton’s posters for the sport bit of the Fete are up and about. They have a space for people to sign up to teams. But, the posters don’t mention what the teams will be doing.
Mind you, Lynda’s performance art sounds more worrying than anything Kenton might have planned.
Keira the Destroyer
Just as the judges are about to come to the Village Shop, Emma and Ed’s Keira starts rearranging it.
(what? What did Keira do to the tub?!? We must be told)
As Lynda arrives at the shop with the judges, she’s trying to tell them about volunteering, when she’s drowned out by Keira’s crying.
Though it’s okay.
Marcia is distracted by the phone box and it’s lovely, lovely flowers.
Keith’s not a happy man
In fact, he sounds near suicidal.
He’s in Ambridge for a hair and make-up rehearsal at Susan’s before the wedding. Well, that’s something most men would turn pale at the thought of …
Better still. Hyper little girls.
It all sounded very raucous at Susan. Even Emma though it was too much – Tracey was supposed to be keeping them all calm:
Then Chelsea’s hamster got loose …
Keith eventually winds up in The Bull having a chat with Joe. He sounds beyond despondent.
Oops.
Sounds like this wedding is on the never ever (never!).
Ignorance is not sexy, Tracey
Tracey has been trying to make lamb samosas. Something to do with trying to win Ifty’s affections.
That’s so wrong, on so many levels, that I actually don’t want to discuss it.
(by the way – seems Ifty’s surname is Sha)
- After all that fuss …
- Marcia fancies Joe?
- Kenton wants you … but won’t say what for
- Keira the Destroyer
- Keith’s not a happy man
- Ignorance is not sexy, Tracey
After all that fuss …
… it was a bit of a slow day in Ambridge.
Shame, really.
Marcia fancies Joe?
So, the great day has arrived.
After all that harassing and demanding, Lynda gets to present Ambridge to the Britain in Bloom judges.
One of who is called Marcia Greeve. The other Douglas (but Douglas doesn’t speak).
[Tracey] “Susan was polishing the veg for them … everyone’s gone bonkers””
It seems to all go fine. She and Jim do the honours.
Well, until Joe and Bartleby clip-clop by to catch Marcia’s eye …
Lynda disentangles them from Joe, only to find Jim steering the judges towards no. 8 The Green. Mind on that this was the only house to not follow the prescribed red, white and blue flower theme. They went yellow …
BUT.
Marcia loved it.
[Marcia] “It’s gaudy, but not garish.”
Jim was beside himself with glee with Marcia said that! What a wicked boy he is to Lynda.
They moved onto the Community Orchard.
Where Joe’s waiting to give them a nip of his cider.
[Lynda, horrified] “Joe’s a real character isn’t he?”
[Marcia] “He’s a real sweetie.”
(if Joe wasn’t 90, and Marcia sounded in her 30s or 40s, I’d have thought we were about to have an Autumn romance)
After all was said and done:
[Jim] “I think that all went rather well.”
[Lynda] “Yes, yes I suppose so … apart from Joe hijacking.”
Though Jim thinks that Marcia liked Joe, and her taking to him was an advantage. Joe certainly thinks so:
[Joe] “Wouldn’t be surprised if I swung the result in our favour.”
Though Joe is more than aware that his ‘help’ wasn’t welcomed by Lynda:
[Joe] “… every time I appeared she tuned a funny colour /… me and Bartleby were more than a match for her!”
Kenton wants you … but won’t say what for
Seems Kenton’s posters for the sport bit of the Fete are up and about. They have a space for people to sign up to teams. But, the posters don’t mention what the teams will be doing.
Mind you, Lynda’s performance art sounds more worrying than anything Kenton might have planned.
Keira the Destroyer
Just as the judges are about to come to the Village Shop, Emma and Ed’s Keira starts rearranging it.
[Susan] “Good job I noticed what she did to that tub earlier”
(what? What did Keira do to the tub?!? We must be told)
As Lynda arrives at the shop with the judges, she’s trying to tell them about volunteering, when she’s drowned out by Keira’s crying.
Though it’s okay.
Marcia is distracted by the phone box and it’s lovely, lovely flowers.
Keith’s not a happy man
In fact, he sounds near suicidal.
He’s in Ambridge for a hair and make-up rehearsal at Susan’s before the wedding. Well, that’s something most men would turn pale at the thought of …
[Tracey] “You should see Chelsea. She’s like a bottle of pop!”
Better still. Hyper little girls.
It all sounded very raucous at Susan. Even Emma though it was too much – Tracey was supposed to be keeping them all calm:
[Emma] “It would be nice of Tracey lent a hand … doesn’t sound like she’s doing too good a job of it.”
Then Chelsea’s hamster got loose …
Keith eventually winds up in The Bull having a chat with Joe. He sounds beyond despondent.
[Keith] “This one’s costing me an arm and several legs … to be honest Joe; I don’t know how I’m going to do it.”
Oops.
Sounds like this wedding is on the never ever (never!).
Ignorance is not sexy, Tracey
Tracey has been trying to make lamb samosas. Something to do with trying to win Ifty’s affections.
That’s so wrong, on so many levels, that I actually don’t want to discuss it.
(by the way – seems Ifty’s surname is Sha)
Thursday, 31 May 2012
Slow day, despite an escaped rat 22.05.12
The Archers 22nd May 2012
Adam has gaps in his garden
After weeding so much
Adam and Ian got to a garden centre
To have lunch and buy colourful plants. Adam gets tired.
Ian thinks Keith looks like a medallion man
But Adam says Clive was the ‘down the top with a worm’ bad ‘un
Keith gave Chelsea a hamster called Hopkirk, Brad a rat called Randall
Randall escape under the sofa
Blood relations do not include fathers of the child
[Keith on Tracey’s ex] “But he’s not a Horrobin trace. He’s low life”
Confirmation Adam has red hair
[Keith] “He hasn’t changed at all. I’d recognise that red hair anywhere”
(so the chap on the BBC website definitely isn’t Adam)
Alan tells Amy Usha will be there for the curry
So Amy calls off
Keith would rather Sam and Ash got married in Gretna
He’d even pay for their bus fare (as it’s cheaper)
- We haven’t had a slow Ambridge day for a while. But here it was:
Adam has gaps in his garden
After weeding so much
Adam and Ian got to a garden centre
To have lunch and buy colourful plants. Adam gets tired.
Ian thinks Keith looks like a medallion man
But Adam says Clive was the ‘down the top with a worm’ bad ‘un
Keith gave Chelsea a hamster called Hopkirk, Brad a rat called Randall
Randall escape under the sofa
Blood relations do not include fathers of the child
[Keith on Tracey’s ex] “But he’s not a Horrobin trace. He’s low life”
Confirmation Adam has red hair
[Keith] “He hasn’t changed at all. I’d recognise that red hair anywhere”
(so the chap on the BBC website definitely isn’t Adam)
Alan tells Amy Usha will be there for the curry
So Amy calls off
Keith would rather Sam and Ash got married in Gretna
He’d even pay for their bus fare (as it’s cheaper)
Monday, 21 May 2012
Blood’s thicker than marriage 09.05.12
The Archers Wednesday 9th May 2012
Well hello Keith Horrobin!
Has Keith Horrobin ever spoken in Ambridge before?
He certainly did tonight. Right old chatterbox was Keith.
Keith turned up at Bert’s (well, Tracey’s). He was surprised to see how much work had to be done to the house.
Tracey gloated about all the changes, and how Neil had done all of the work.
Though Keith wasn’t just round to admire Neil’s paintwork. He was there to tell Tracey about some good family news. His Samantha is getting married to Ash.
Hurrah! A Horrobin wedding.
Though Samantha and Ash had a “rough patch” last year, they’ve made up and have decided to make themselves proper. They also want Tracey’s Chelsea to be a bridesmaid – which is seemingly Chelsea’s “number one ambition”.
Ruth’s not happy with Pat
Well, technically she’s not happy with Tom for asking Pip to run the Gourmet Burger van.
Pat could only apologise. But must be secretly pleased that Bridge Farm has another helping hand.
Is Pip still going to do the milking?
Pat and Ruth lose their cojones
Ruth wasn’t just round to have a go at Pat because of Tom.
Ruth and Pat had a meeting with Hattie Marshall (of Borchester Against Factory Farming).
The news isn’t that good. Hattie thinks that although they could appeal against the Super Dairy being given planning permission, the appeal would cost them. And they’d likely lose.
But, Hattie thinks that there’s more than one way to stop a Super Dairy. She thinks the next step would be to put “real” pressure on BL:
So, that means (in Hattie’s mind) picketing the Mart again. Try and force business to go elsewhere, while getting publicity.
Ruth isn’t so sure. She’s mainly thinking of the impact it’d have on David as NFU Chair. He’s supposed to remain neutral.
So, Hattie suggests a boycott of all Home Farm produce. Which would largely mean their soft fruit and venison. Which is Adam’s side of the business. And Adam, as we all know, is already against the Super Dairy.
She’s quite right. Pat and Ruth tell her that they think they’ve already lost. Nothing more to be done.
So although Pat and Ruth have given up, Hattie is very much full steam ahead …
… hmmm. The protest against the Super Dairy being led by a non-local.
That’ll be interesting.
Usha gets the cold shoulder
Usha calls Ruth, very upset.
Amy’s still not come home from Alice’s. And Alan is “out of his mind” with worry. But he won’t talk to Usha as he thinks Amy not being at home is Usha’s fault (for not telling Amy that Carl was married. If he is).
When Ruth later meets up with Usha, she finds Usha annoyed at herself for having “procrastinated”.
Keith’s business isn’t doing well
Does Keith run a garage? Car showroom?
Seems he does. He was saying that he hasn’t sold anything in a fortnight, so is surviving on MOTs and maintenance.
‘Tis tough out there indeed.
The Ambridge Beast is seen again!
And nearly rear ended another car when it braked suddenly as “the beast” ran across the road.
Seems Jazzer has also had a “beast” experience.
Ouch!
So, what do we reckon “the beast” is?
An escaped zoo animal? A (very) large lurcher?
Susan mentions the white elephant
Talking about Keith’s Samantha getting married, Susan wonders when Ed and Emma will do the deed.
Oh-ho!
- Well hello Keith Horrobin!
- Ruth’s not happy with Pat
- Pat and Ruth lose their cojones
- Usha gets the cold shoulder
- Keith’s business isn’t doing well
- The Ambridge Beast is seen again!
- Susan mentions the white elephant
Well hello Keith Horrobin!
Has Keith Horrobin ever spoken in Ambridge before?
He certainly did tonight. Right old chatterbox was Keith.
Keith turned up at Bert’s (well, Tracey’s). He was surprised to see how much work had to be done to the house.
[Keith] “What a difference a coat of paint makes, eh!”
Tracey gloated about all the changes, and how Neil had done all of the work.
[Tracey] “Susan picked a good ‘un there”
Though Keith wasn’t just round to admire Neil’s paintwork. He was there to tell Tracey about some good family news. His Samantha is getting married to Ash.
Hurrah! A Horrobin wedding.
Though Samantha and Ash had a “rough patch” last year, they’ve made up and have decided to make themselves proper. They also want Tracey’s Chelsea to be a bridesmaid – which is seemingly Chelsea’s “number one ambition”.
Ruth’s not happy with Pat
Well, technically she’s not happy with Tom for asking Pip to run the Gourmet Burger van.
[Ruth] “I appreciate he needs the help. I just wish he’d found someone else”
Pat could only apologise. But must be secretly pleased that Bridge Farm has another helping hand.
Is Pip still going to do the milking?
Pat and Ruth lose their cojones
Ruth wasn’t just round to have a go at Pat because of Tom.
Ruth and Pat had a meeting with Hattie Marshall (of Borchester Against Factory Farming).
The news isn’t that good. Hattie thinks that although they could appeal against the Super Dairy being given planning permission, the appeal would cost them. And they’d likely lose.
But, Hattie thinks that there’s more than one way to stop a Super Dairy. She thinks the next step would be to put “real” pressure on BL:
[Hattie] “Make it more trouble that it’s worth”
So, that means (in Hattie’s mind) picketing the Mart again. Try and force business to go elsewhere, while getting publicity.
Ruth isn’t so sure. She’s mainly thinking of the impact it’d have on David as NFU Chair. He’s supposed to remain neutral.
[Hattie] “This has got to be a matter of individual conscience … but there’s a big principle at stake here”
So, Hattie suggests a boycott of all Home Farm produce. Which would largely mean their soft fruit and venison. Which is Adam’s side of the business. And Adam, as we all know, is already against the Super Dairy.
[Pat] “I don’t feel comfortable with a boycott that hits someone that’s opposed to the boycott anyway”
[Hattie, getting frustrated] “I’m beginning to sense that neither of you have the stomach to carry on”
She’s quite right. Pat and Ruth tell her that they think they’ve already lost. Nothing more to be done.
[Hattie] “There are plenty of people who are appalled that the Council has capitulated to BL”
So although Pat and Ruth have given up, Hattie is very much full steam ahead …
… hmmm. The protest against the Super Dairy being led by a non-local.
That’ll be interesting.
Usha gets the cold shoulder
Usha calls Ruth, very upset.
Amy’s still not come home from Alice’s. And Alan is “out of his mind” with worry. But he won’t talk to Usha as he thinks Amy not being at home is Usha’s fault (for not telling Amy that Carl was married. If he is).
When Ruth later meets up with Usha, she finds Usha annoyed at herself for having “procrastinated”.
[Usha] “That’s the worst thing. He’s absolutely wretched … he can’t talk to me about it … He so desperately wants her to come home. And because of me she won’t … for so many years it was Alan and Amy against the world … and now, I’m on the outside again”
Keith’s business isn’t doing well
Does Keith run a garage? Car showroom?
Seems he does. He was saying that he hasn’t sold anything in a fortnight, so is surviving on MOTs and maintenance.
‘Tis tough out there indeed.
The Ambridge Beast is seen again!
And nearly rear ended another car when it braked suddenly as “the beast” ran across the road.
[Keith] “Biggish, brownish”
Seems Jazzer has also had a “beast” experience.
[Susan] “Seen what he describes as a great hairy mutant disappearing into the morning mist”
[Keith] “Probably was Lynda Snell”
Ouch!
So, what do we reckon “the beast” is?
An escaped zoo animal? A (very) large lurcher?
Susan mentions the white elephant
Talking about Keith’s Samantha getting married, Susan wonders when Ed and Emma will do the deed.
[Keith] “At least Emma’s a Grundy already”
Oh-ho!
Tuesday, 28 December 2010
The Archers Mon 27th Dec 2010: Ian and Adam’s party
- “You’ve got a hard act to follow after Susan’s do”
- “They’re quite a tribe”
- Jennifer and Keith?
- Helen wants to leave Ambridge!
- Adam has twins
- What more than Nic did a good dinner?
- Joe‘s still trying
- Brian’s off to see John Humphries
- Oscar and the pussy cat
- Helen leaves early. Again.
“You’ve got a hard act to follow after Susan’s do …
… you weren’t tempted to invite all the Horrobin’s tonight for a return match?”
(said Brian to Adam)
[Adam] “No. We found that idea very resistant”
[Brian] “They’re quite a tribe … did I hear Bert Horrobin telling Ian he’s got grandsons called Ronaldo and Gerard Horrobin… extraordinary!”
[Brian] “Still, I have to hand it to them. They know how to enjoy themselves … even your mother was forced to admit she had a good time … the start of a beautiful friendship for her and Keith Horrobin”
Jennifer and Keith?
Just a thought.
We haven’t had a good affair in a while. The Shocker for the 60th anniversary?
Helen wants to leave Ambridge!
Well, just for the day, but when was the last time Helen wanted to “go further afield”?
Maybe her baby will be a good influence.
Though I suspect her desire to go a-wandering is more to do with staying away from Tony …
Anyhoo, Kirsty and Helen are off on a nice country walk, which soon turns into a bit of a trial for Kirsty.
Despite Helen being heavily pregnant, it’s Kirsty who’s huffing and puffing, desperately trying to get Helen to stop at one of the many pubs they’re passing.
[Helen] “If you’re hungry, you’re more than welcome to a cereal bar or an apple”
Poor Kirsty. Still:
[Kirsty] “I’m just relieved she didn’t give birth in a field”
That’d have truly been the ‘natural’ birth Helen yearns for.
Adam has twins
Think about it before you panic ….
It’s the start of lambing, with Adam’s first lambs being a rather difficult birth of twins.
Claire, their new student who arrived just as the first ewe was giving birth, had to get right in the thick of it to save the lambs.
They were tangled, with:
[Adam] “Presentation was no head three legs one of them a back leg”
They only managed to sort everything out by pushing the lambs back inside the ewe, with Claire having small enough hands to sort everything out.
Shall we be hearing more from the Claire of small hands?
What more than Nic did a good dinner?
Now Pat’s on about how Nic did the Grundy’s proud by cooking a good dinner, and mentioned that they all had a “nice Christmas”.
So was that it?
All that fuss over Will and Ed having to spend Christmas together. And it was “nice”.
*hmph*
Joe‘s still trying
Joe had been round to Ian and Adam with some tempting greenery to buy.
After not making any sales to the shoot, Joe’s now going round folks who are having parties to try and get a final few sales of his mistletoe and kissing boughs.
If God does love a trier, Joe will be well sorted.
Brian’s off to see John Humphries
At some sort of Conference in Oxford.
And that’s all I know so far (anyone else have an idea about this one?)
Oscar and the pussy cat
Lynda has had to accept that her 14 month grandson (Oscar) is too young to be able to sit through the whole Panto.
But he is going to have a special audience with Sabrina at the end.
He must really like cats …
Helen leaves early. Again.
[Tony] “She can hardly bear to be in the same room as me”
Helen does make it to Ian and Adam’s party, only to have to leave again as she’s tired.
Well, that’s at least her excuse.
She did manage to have a quick chat with Pat, but utterly avoided Tony. On leaving, she gave Ian and Pat a kiss, but only a “bye dad” to Tony.
So, she sets Tony off again in thinking everything she does is about him, and avoiding him:
[Tony] “I reckon she’s going to be tied for the rest of her pregnancy … when I’m around anyway”
No ego there then, Tony!
They’re really as bad as each other. Paranoid. Self-obsessed. Stubborn.
Here’s hoping the baby being born will actually help clear the air. This is all getting a tad tedious.
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