Broken sensor lights and cash in hand 24.05.12

The Archers Thursday 24th May 2012

• Elona’s a doormat
• Lilian takes Darrell’s side, but wouldn’t marry him
• Ben’s help build the silage clamp
• Scary times at Brookfield

Elona’s cutting Tom’s hedge

After Darrell has already cut their lawn. He thinks Tom and Brenda are taking advantage.

[Elona] “No. They’re friends”

[Darrell] “Only sometimes can you try too hard, then you become a doormat”

[Elona] “There is a law in life Darrell. If you give out, you get back”

Actually – Tom and Brenda should be ashamed of themselves. Adam, mere weeks after being attacked, is getting on with his own garden.


Lilian takes Darrell’s side, but wouldn’t marry him

Darrell gives Elona £50 to put to the fund they’re saving for one of their daughters. Which means Matt gave Darrell cash in hand again. Elona isn’t happy about that, as Darrell knows.

[Darrell] “We should be grateful someone’s taken a chance on me … Elona, it’s the build trade, not the civil service”

[Elona] “I just don’t want you slipping back (to prison) … You accuse me of being a doormat, being eager to please, but you are just the same … stand up for yourself … I won’t accept this way of living. Go back to Matt and tell him to make you official. From next week … I’m not living in the shadows. Think about your girls”

[Darrell “This is going to be embarrassing”

[Elona] “That’s your choice, isn’t it. Embarrassment or shame”

Darrel chose embarrassment. He went to round to Matt's to ask to be paid on the books, just as Matt and Lilian are off out in the car.

Matt says he’ll get back to him.

[Lilian] “I wish you wouldn’t do that … where’s my lighter … tell people you’ll do things when you haven’t the slightest intention of doing them … we should think about it, you know. Darrell’s a damn good chippie. I’d be sorry if he walked away”

[Matt] “With his record, in this climate, are you kidding?”

Matt reckons he doesn’t want to complicate what’s an easy casual arrangement.

[Lilian] “It obviously took a lot for him to summon up the nerve to ask you”

[Matt] “Ah, that’s just his pushy wife, innit”

[Lilian] “She needs to be pushy. He’s very sweet, but not husband material”

[Matt] “How very old fashioned you are sometimes, pussycat”

[Lilian] “I can’t stand a wishy washy man, though considerate would be nice … If we upset Elona, we’ll have mum to answer to …You should pay for quality, Matt. Surely I’ve taught you that”

Matt tells Lilian to leave “the workforce” to him, but Lilian is far from done.


Ben’s help build the silage clamp

Well done Ben.


Scary times at Brookfield

David has to go to an NFU meeting tonight, which means Ruth’s home alone.

[Ruth] “Well I’ll just barricade myself in with the kids”

When David gets back (he needs to have his breaks check, by the way. They were very squeaky), it’s gone 10.30pm. Ruth’s in a flap, even though David texted.

David’s also a bit perturbed that the security lights didn’t come on when he drove back in. He goes to check. At first he thinks the glass is blown, but if it has, it’s more than one light that’s gone. They’re all shattered.

[David] “I reckon this is kids, Ruth. They’ve seen the kitchen is dark and taken their chance”

[Ruth] “This light’s just below Ben’s room … what if he’d been at the window … I want you to ring the Police”

[David] “I don’t think we should assume the worst”

[Ruth] “It’s a priority to me … we need to report it. Just  do it. Please”

The Archers Sunday 8th May 2011: Grey Gable’s roof is leaking

(seriously – that was the highlight of this eavesdropping episode)

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• George can’t put his jumper on
• My son this, my son that
• Catwallender’s aren’t happy
• Shearers and Silage
• Cricket might be the answer
• Will didn’t invite Ed and Emma

George can’t put his jumper on

He’s run out of holes, but Nic shows him that he should start at the bottom.

Foolproof.


My son this, my son that

As Ed’s collecting George from Will and Nic’s, Will couldn’t help himself.

[Will] “Didn’t you son … he takes after me”

Ed fights Will’s paternity with a trip to Lower Loxley.

And is also trying to persuade George that Keira has been grizzly recently because she misses George.

Anyone else feeling that George is being pulled hither and tither?




Catwallender’s aren’t happy

The leak at Grey Gables was in their room at Grey Gables.

They already hadn’t been able to get the room they wanted (as it was already booked by a regular client).

And now, not only is their room rather damp. But they’re now in a room that’s smaller, with a view of the car park.

Worse still, for Caroline, is that the Catwallanders seemingly have a very wide social circle, and are respected. They are, after all, a vicar and a doctor.

Wonder if a few more crises like this will send Caroline screaming into retirement?


Shearers and Silage

The shearers are due at Brookfield, and silage is due.

Yup. Definitely summer.


Cricket might be the answer

There’s talk of whether Jamie will join the cricket team this year.

He’s back at home. Laying the table. And cricket could be the final sign that Jamie’s on the mend.

Here’s hoping.


Will didn’t invite Ed and Emma

It’s Clarrie’s birthday, so Will decides that he and Nic should invite everyone round to theirs to celebrate.

And Nic agrees.

But no mention of Will only saying Clarrie, Eddie and Joe would be coming.

Hmmm.

Well, at least someone is doing something nice for Clarrie (Eddie … pull your finger out!).

The Archers Sunday 1st May 2011: Kathy bows down to Jamie

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• Second mention of silage clamp!
• Ted has an impressive box
• Jamie has it made
• But has Jamie changed?
• Abby is a worry
• Jill Vs Lilian
• AV, Ambridge style
• Missing Mandisa
• Son or husband?

Second mention of silage clamp!

No idea why I get so excited about the silage clamp time of year, but I do.

Though a mention of Tony working on a tractor always sends shivers.




Ted has an impressive box

Ted took an enamel box, which he’d made. She was very impressed. Very impressed indeed.

Kathy and Pat have spotted that Peggy seems to be quite fond indeed of Ted proper, as well as Ted’s box.


Jamie has it made

Back at home with Kathy, Jamie came in late, but didn’t get shouted at … gets woken up gently by Kathy, in plenty of time for his shift at The Bull … Kathy then makes him sausages … and takes his dirty clothes away to wash them.

I hate to say it, but Jamie’s mates were right. Jamie has Kathy right where he wants her.


But has Jamie changed?

He has got Kathy pandering to him, but he also seems to be in better feckle.

Jamie sort of agreed with Kathy that he probably should have his exam schedule up somewhere in the house (which is better than just shouting).

And he told Kathy that he’d come home after his shift at The Bull to then start revising.

Cripes!


Abby is a worry

As Roy is mulling over, with Hayley, that this is his last week at Lower Loxley (after having started there as a waiter 14 years ago), this rather odd moment happened:

[Hayley] “Is Abbie alright over there? She’s not trying to eat those daisies again?”

Well! Abbie seems to be one to watch.


Jill Vs Lilian

Jill and Lilian are both standing for election (for the Parish Council).

Who would you choose? Conservatives (with a most robust capital C) or the Gin Party?

Hmmm.


AV, Ambridge style

Peggy’s chatting with Kathy about AV.

Peggy reckons she understand how it works, and isn’t sure it is a good thing.

[Peggy] “the old system seems to have done us well enough … better than some of these continental countries with all the bickering and horse trading that goes on”

(*snort* Peggy will be going on about the Colonies next!)

Kathy, on the other hand, reckons a change might be a good thing, and might make folks feel that their vote counts.

Phew! Heady times indeed.


Missing Mandisa

Here we go.

[Phoebe] “If l lived over there … we could be proper friends”

So we know Phoebe had a grand time in South Africa, but sounds like she was more fond of it than Roy and Hayley would like.

Phoebe is fixating on her new bessie mate Mandisa, who she met in South Africa, as the reason why she wants to be back in South Africa.

Phoebe can go. As long as she takes Kate with her …



Son or husband?

Is it just me, or has Kathy forgotten that Jamie is her son, not her husband?

In her speed to play nice with Jamie, Kathy sounds like she has a cheating husband to placate – along the lines of ‘as long as he comes home’ sort of nonsense.

[Kathy] “Safe subjects only … I don’t say too much that might rock the boat. So I play the doting mother. Cooking his meals, doing his washing, tidying up after him”

To be fair, Kathy does know what she sounds like, as she describes it to Pat, and she knows it’s not good for either her nor Jamie.

Must admit, I’m not fussed. As long as they don’t scream at each other.

The Archers Friday 29th April 2011: The Royal Wedding

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• Kenton’s putting yet more bunting
• Kenton then gives “Jamie a reality check”
• David – that’s just not cricket
• Jamie. Home. Being polite.
• Did I hear mention of a silage clamp?
• Ambridge on Kate and Will

Kenton’s putting yet more bunting

But it’s again not at a great height. So little to no chance of anyone else dying, while trying to undo one of Kenton’s knots.

[Kenton] “At a time like this, every man has to do his patriotic duty”

Actually, maybe he should put them up a bit higher and make sure one of our lesser-favourite-Ambridge residents has a go …


Kenton then gives “Jamie a reality check”

Busy chap today, is our Kenton.

After manfully wrestling with the bunting, he then takes on the untamed, obnoxious little beastie that it Jamie.

And Kenton didn’t tread too lightly either.

[Kenton] “It’s time you stopped living in never never land”

Kenton tells Jamie all. That Jolene “isn’t cool” about Jamie living at The Bull indefinitely. That she isn’t his mum. That he needs looking after. That £10 a week isn’t really contributing. And that he belongs with his mum.

Jamie gets a tad tense, so Kenton says his bit, then leaves Jamie to “work the rest out” by himself.

I wonder if Jamie is capable of managing anything by himself? And if he’ll get the message? Finally??



David – that’s just not cricket

It would seem that David wants to quit the cricket team.

So that gives Shula a reason to send Alistair over to speak to David about his post-traumatic stress (as diagnosed by Shula and Ruth, unbeknownst to David).

Alistair does try. But he’s as bad as trying to get David to speak as David is as speaking.

David was evasive, Alistair got nowhere and David is quitting the cricket team.



Jamie. Home. Being polite.

Looks like Kenton did manage to get through to Jamie after all.

My word.

Not sure if that’s a good or a bad thing. Our last experience of Jamie living at home was shouting, shouting, shouting, shouting.

He walks back ‘home’ and starts quite well. Attempting to first just head to his room, he stops to say:

[Jamie] “Yeah I’m staying … I mean … if that’s okay with you?”

[Kathy] “You don’t have to ask”

I’ll say this quietly so that I don’t scare it away … but could this be Kathy and Jamie finally talking to each other like decent human beings?



Did I hear mention of a silage clamp?

I think I did.

Hurrah! It’s silage time already!!


Ambridge on Kate and Will

[Kathy] “Hope they look as happy in 10 years’ time”

(does that woman every feel any joy? Then again, she did end up watching it alone at home …)

[Shula on Alistair what Alistair reckons to the wedding] “has better things to do than watch daytime TV”

[Jolene] “Didn’t they look happy … proper happy”

[Kenton] “The royals can put on a god show, I’ll give them that”

[Jolene] “Raise your glass please … the happy couple. Kate and William!”

Clarrie and Kathy cried buckets. Those in their separate homes. Then told each other on the phone.

And that was that.

Quite a relief, really, after the rest of the BBC was 24/7 wedding!

But, seems a nice time was had by all, which I won’t be cynical about. For once …

The Archers Monday 4th April 2011: Jill’s not happy with Kenton

click the 'read more' link below the bullet points to read the full post on this eavesdropping episode

• The Return of the Bees
• Roy’s definitely interested
• Kenton told the family
• Jamie is stopping Kenton getting his leg over
• No sympathy for Kathy
• That’s it for Johne’s?
• What did Jill actually say?
• Brian took Ruairi fishing
• Jill’s catering Gardeners’ Question Time

The Return of the Bees

Jill was feeding her bees today, but will be able to stop soon enough. Everything’s started to grow.

Later on:

[Jill] “See that the whole farm is coming into life again … the blossoms out … you’re getting the clamp ready for silaging …cows are out … the milk’s gushing into the tank”

Stay steady folks. Summer is on its way .



Roy’s definitely interested

So Elizabeth is putting together an offer for him.

But keep it quiet … Elizabeth’s not quite ready to be bitch-slapped by Caroline.


Kenton told the family

I wondered why Jill sounded so off with Kenton (as then did Elizabeth wonder)..

[Jill] “Elizabeth, what does he expect? After what he told us at the weekend …”

He “killed two birds” and told Shula and Jill about him seeing Jolene, both at the same time.

He’d already told Elizabeth (who didn’t give a hoot), and Shula wished them well after first being a bit stunned.

Jill, however, is none too amused. As we’d come to expect, of our Jill.




Jamie is stopping Kenton getting his leg over

And Jolene from doing likewise!

Totally unintentional (of course), but Jamie staying at The Bull means Kenton and Jolene can only grab a quick snog.



No sympathy for Kathy

It might just be because Kenton and Jolene are currently in deep lust, but I’m finding their total disregard for Kathy a bit callous.

Jolene jokes about the run-in she had with Kathy:

[Jolene] “I’ve been in worse cat fights over the years … at least no hair pulling”

And they don’t seem to give a monkey’s about how Kathy feels at Jamie also abandoning her.

Maybe Jolene really does have a master plan to remove all male persons from Kathy’s life.


That’s it for Johne’s?

Only 1 out of 3 cows prefer …ahem … have Johne’s, and Alistair has traced it back through the herd.

David’s being morose about what yield they’ve probably lost over the years, but Jill’s trying to cheer him up:

[Jill] "David, you sound just like your father”

[David] “Thanks a lot. Is that supposed to make me feel better?”

[Jill] “Yes. It’s a compliment.”

And so it is David.

That you become as good a man as Phil …


What did Jill actually say?

I’m intrigued.

Just exactly y what was Jill’s response to Kenton telling her he was seeing Jolene.

Jolene reckons Jill wasn’t amused because of her rather colourful (“scandalous”, says Jolene) past:

[Jolene] “I’m well aware I wouldn’t be your family’s first choice “

But Kenton reckons not. It’s more about him than her.

[Kenton] “Let’s face it. Mum’s well past being shocked by anything I do”

But it just goes to show that Kenton knows nothing about his mum.

Jill later says to David that she was shocked. How could he do this to Kathy? And that Sid has been dead long enough.

[David] “It’s not the first time Jolene’s ended up with her bloke”

And of course – this all gives David another good reason to have a pop at his brother.

[Jill] “Still. I suppose there’s nothing we can do”

[David] “He will do whatever he wants., with whoever he wants. And the rest of us have just got to make the best of it.”

Brian took Ruairi fishing

But it won’t last..

Phoebe and Jennifer only left today, and Ruairi will soon be packed off to Ireland.

Leaving time for Brian to get to know Elona better …???


Jill’s catering Gardeners’ Question Time

Marvellous.

But she does seem a bit stressed about what ‘light refreshments’ for the presenters and the production team could mean.

[Jill] “It’s a very lose term, though, light refreshments. A sort of buffet tea, I suppose”

18th May 2010

• The gift that keeps on giving
• The corkscrew has moved, but brandy upstairs ….
• Ask Kenton about the Sticky Wicket
• Did I hear silage mentioned?

The gift that keeps on giving

Never mind Eddie and Joe – the good was going while David didn’t know about it.

Of course he has right on his side, but didn’t he seem a bit pompous?

Casting up is never a good thing, and telling someone they only got the job because of you doing a good deed is a tad off-hand. Didn’t Eddie have a part to play in it?

Still – one cannot step on the reputation of Saint David, and he did at least pre-warn Eddie so that he wasn’t fired.

Yet.

The corkscrew has moved, but brandy upstairs …

I know Matt doesn’t have that many fans out there, but I was glad to see him back at home with his Pusscat.

New robe, long shower, good food, a garden to relax in and a lovely woman to share it with.

A happy, fruity sounding Lilian. Just as we like her.

Ask Kenton about the Sticky Wicket

Seriously, I’ve said it before – but does anyone ever say anything nice about Kenton, or take an interest in him?

Did I hear silage mentioned?

That, and the Sticky Wicket, must mean that summer has started.