Lynda woos Maurice – Mon 21.10.13 #thearchers

Pondering The Archers Monday 21st October 2013

• The Bellingham’s Bounce
• Maurice has a liking for Anthea
• Jazzer has gossip!
• Lynda tries to flatter Maurice into submission
• Joe doesn’t want to go anywhere

Jim gets Joe excited: Tues 15.10.13 #thearchers

Pondering the Archers Tuesday 15th October 2013

• In a spare hour, Alistair paints the cricket pavilion
• Hey Jude, on repeat …
• Did Darrell go to the doctor?
• The Community Orchard tempts out Joe
• More trouble with Ed’s cows
• Neil’s ruined it for everyone
• Brenda’s still making coffee!

Darrell fixes a lock – Sun 06.10.13 #thearchers

Pondering The Archers Sunday 6th October 2013

• The Church is still busier than usual
• Shula’s already exasperated with Darrell
• Emma’s stunned at Nic’s ingratitude
• The word is out about Tom and Kirsty
• One calf is already for the chop
• Joe’s missed at The Bull
• Emma’s against paternity leave
• Emma’s against Poppy meeting Joe

Poppy’s named after a cow – Wed 02.10.13 #thearchers

Pondering The Archers Wednesday 2nd October 2013

• Spare a thought for them outdoors
• Gies a ring
• “Four weeks’ time, I’ll be Mrs Archer!”
• Elvis will walk Jolene up the aisle
• Why has Oliver never heard of Etta James?
• Rosa calls Darrell smelly
• That local authority chap has been back
• Joe’s not even interested in Bartleby
• Joe’s talking like a dead man walking
• Poppy was a cow
• Darrell nearly gets barred
• When Ed met Oliver

Joe misses Bartleby – Fri 27.09.13 #thearchers

Pondering The Archers Friday 27th September 2013

• Caroline’s losing customers
• Kathy should sue?
• Rosa has enough sandwiches for Jamie
• Rosa and Jamie?
• Rosa does and doesn’t want to know about her dad
• Caroline reckons Eddie’s just human
• What department is Mr Hughes from?
• Joe couldn’t find his slippers
• Bartleby and Joe, back together

Some bloke attacks Darrell – Tues 24.09.13 #thearchers

Pondering The Archers Tuesday 24th September 2013

• Nic’s happy to help
• Joe will be planning his funeral soon
• They still don’t like that Super Dairy
• Josh is donating his eggs
• Eric beats up Darrell
• Kathy went wrong when she left teaching
• Eddie’s got a solicitor

The lads shear some sheep: Wed 19.06.13 #thearchers

Pondering The Archers Wednesday 19th June 2013

• Jazzer farts
• Wednesdays are always quiet in The Bull
• Did Lilian leave her pants?
• Jazzer to work in the Super Dairy?

Jazzer farts

Ed, Jazzer and Jamie are on their shearing job.

All went well with the work, so we hear more of them after the fact. While downing pints.

[Jazzer] “Come on lads, may be the sheep be plentiful and the wool thick and long!”

As they then bed down for the night, Jazzer starts farting.

[Jazzer] “Better oot than in.”

(ooft … I could smell that from here!)

Well, at least Jamie would well chuffed to be part of the shearing team.


Wednesdays are always quiet in The Bull

Wonder why that is?


Did Lilian leave her pants?

Matt reckons that now Paul’s funeral is over, both he and Lilian can look forward to their holiday.

Hmmm.

Lilian then calls Jolene in a panic. She hasn’t packed. And worse, as she starts, she realises:

[Lilian] “Oh my god, my perfume. I left my perfume in the apartment!”

And her scarf.

Lilian’s in a pure panic now. She’s terrified Paul’s children will realise they belong to her, and then realise something had been afoot.

So, Jolene agrees to go with Lilian to collect her stuff from the flat.

When they get there, Lilian wants to take the watercolour she and Paul bought together. Which Jolene agrees to stash at hers.

[Lilian] “Oh Paul. And you were so alone!”

And she starts sobbing.

Lilian now reckons she can’t go on holiday with Matt. It doesn’t “feel right”.

But Jolene tries to reason that it’s a new start for her.

[Jolene] “What’s happened to Paul has been horrible for you.”

[Lilian] “I loved him.”

[Jolene] “I know, and I know how’ll bad you’ll miss him. I don’t wanna seem harsh, but he’s gone. Matt’s here, and Matt loves you … I know you love him.”

But, Lilian admits that if Paul hadn’t died, Lilian would probably have left Matt.

[Jolene] “He’s got his faults, well so has any man. So have we all. You’ve got so much in common, your fight, your ambition, your drive,. Your brains. You complement each other so well. Don’t throw it all away Lilian. Not now.”

Oh dear.

Maybe Matt’s psychological warfare is having an effect on Lilian, but one which will destroy them.

(and no. It didn’t sound like Lilian left her pants)


Jazzer to work in the Super Dairy?

Well, he is going to ask Rob for a job.

[Ed] “Put you next to a cow, and you wouldn’t know one end from the udder!”

(oh ho!)

But Jazzer reckons he has “transferrable” skills. And he also wants his own flat (the job just happens to come with one).

The interview should be interesting (probably reminiscent of Spud’s in Trainspotting)

Funerals and Fairy Lights: Fri 14.06.13 #thearchers

Pondering The Archers Friday 14th June 2013

• Jazzer lies about fairy lights
• Emma’s flowers droop, Nic’s don’t
• Ed’s bought off Jamie
• Lilian doesn’t want to say goodbye to Paul

Emma had to turn a mattress: Wed 12.06.13 #thearchers

Pondering The Archers Wednesday 12th June 2013

• Size doesn’t matter to Jazzer
• Emma actually has to do some graft
• Clarrie recruits Jazzer
• George is still praying
• Clarrie picks her weeds, they just grow back
• Emma wants to arrange flowers

It’s Sticky Wicket 2013 – Mon 27.05.13 #thearchers

Pondering The Archers Monday 27th May 2013

• Brookfield hopes for a non-exciting Open Farm Sunday
• Sticky Wicket time

A cow reacts at Bridge Farm – Mon 06.05.13 #thearchers

Pondering The Archers Monday 6th May 2013

• Neil offers Josh 30%
• Phoebe likes living with Brenda
• Ed and Jazzer attack the Brookfield sheep
• One, lonely cow at Bridge Farm

Fifty Thousand for an organ – Wed 24.04.13 #thearchers

Pondering The Archers Wednesday 24th April 2013

• Nic’s snared into flower arranging
• Is Clarrie sometimes forgetful?
• Pip’s ungrateful
• No sheep to shear
• St Stephens has a very expensive organ
• Kids keep ‘em together, and split ‘em apart
• One does not need champagne when one has scones

Darrell’s been aiding dog fighting: Tues 16.04.13 #thearchers

Pondering The Archers Tuesday 16th May 2013

• Ed can’t even go to darts without being nagged
• Ed wishes Nic and Will well
• Darrell cleans up dog blood
• Clarrie soothes Emma
• The Bull darts team win
• Neil helps Darrell

Chris wakes up: Wed 13.03.13 #thearchers

The Archers Wednesday 13th March 2013

• Chris talks to Emma
• The village blames Alice
• Ed’s a marketing genius!
• Peas or beans?
• Ed doesn’t have to be forced into the same room as Will
• Ed’s a gent
• Just good friends

The lads reckon it was Chris’ fault: Mon 11.03.13

The Archers Monday 11th March 2013

• “Don’t you ever get tired of leek and potato?”
• But Susan hasn’t got flu?
• Tom sees reason
• A whopping profit for Ed and Jazzer
• Jazzer fancies Elona
• When is prison “ a holiday camp”?
• Chris is in hospital because of Chris

Ed gets a penny, no change for Chris: Wed 06.03.13 #thearchers

The Archers Wednesday 6th March 2013

• Chris is fine, apart from a ruptured intestine (!)
• Ed uses the power of s spreadsheet against Mike
• When was the last time Felphersham Hospital had a review?

Chris gets bladdered: Mon 04.03.13 #thearchers

The Archers Monday 4th March 2013

• Pat and Tom row over veg boxes
• Jazzer has more names for the shearing business
• Bad paint job
• Chris doesn’t even want Freda’s pie!

Alice is off to Canada*: Fri 01.03.13

*for the interview

The Archers Friday 1st March 2013

• Alice and Pip are such girls!
• Anne Franks’ house
• Alice makes her choice
• The Tractor project begins
• Just tell Pip to move out!
• Why are Ambridge residents turning bad?

Jazzer buys a tractor: Tues 26.02.13 #thearchers

The Archers Tuesday 26th February

• Lynda’s being evasive
• Jazzer rips offs an elderly widow
• Pip says sorry to Tom
• Pat didn’t even cook Tom a birthday meal
• “High heels and flaming Sambuca”

Susan picks on Jennifer: Mon 25.02.13 #thearchers

The Archer Monday 25th February 2012

• Susan’s not amused with Jennifer
• Concrete costs too much
• Ed’s happy with his lot
• It is a T20
• Emma thinks of someone else