Darrell will have to do wrong again: Tues 12.03.13 #thearchers

The Archers Tuesday 12th March 2013

• Brenda’s not a happy work bunny
• Elona buys sweets for the residents
• Jill ties to recruit Elona to the WI
• What’s a “sporting evening”?
• Matt in Borchester Life?
• Vicky’s fuming

Susan’s feeling positive: 02.03.12 #thearchers

The Archers Wednesday 2nd  January 2013

• Pip hasn’t broken any bones
• Josh to be a banker?
• Jack enjoyed his cake
• Off to Whitby!
• Jill’s in charge of Bob’s funeral
• Ruth sets Ed onto Mike
• Susan knows about Donna and Clive
• “How much further?”
• Happy days in the Carter household

James uses Matt’s remote: Thurs 25.10.12 #thearchers

The Archers Thursday 25th October 2012

• Not a warm welcome for James
• Joe’s teeth startle Peggy
• Peggy, Jack and a box of leaves
• Tom has a “Guilt free, therefore stress free, solution for the woman”
• A fag and a chat with Paul
• Too salty!

Not a warm welcome for James

Matt’s obviously not remotely amused that he has to suffer (a broken) James in  his (and Lilian’s) house.

He reckons that, despite his broken leg and the trauma of being in a car crash, James is a “lucky boy”.

[Matt] “Here’s you, with Lilian running round after you … Keep your orders to a minimum, keep yourself from under her feet, and keep yourself busy.”

It doesn’t get off to a good start.

James manages to get to the remote before Matt does … oh dear.


Joe’s teeth startle Peggy

She doesn’t need that sort of shock at her stage of life.


Peggy, Jack and a box of leaves

Peggy’s collected autumn leaves and berries to talk to Jack at the Laurels. They’re going to look at them, feel them and talk about them.

Sounds marvellous.

Jack’s a lucky chap indeed.


Tom has a “Guilt free, therefore stress free, solution for the woman”

Tom’s still banging on about what Christmas special he can sell.

Takes Peggy to have the bright idea.

She reasons that the:

[Peggy] “One thing the Christmas cooks need is time”

So, she suggests Tom markets his ready meals as a time save in the run up to Christmas.

[Tom] “Gran, you are a legend”

Brenda concurs.

[Brenda] “Guilt free, therefore stress free, solution for the woman”

[Tom] “Or man.”

[Brenda] “Yeah but it's usually a woman, and a man wouldn't stress about it in the same way.”

Hmmm.


A fag and a chat with Paul

Lilian’s a tad stressed herself, running round after James, and having to suffer Matt not quietly suffering James.

As she’s out for a cigarette, Paul telephones her, and calls her a “kind and loving woman.”

Keep this up Paul … she’ll be yours in not time.

(though it’s not been proved yet whether Paul is actually the nicer or better of the two brothers)


Too salty!

Tom’s readymade meals, ready made by another company, are ready.

(sorry!)

[Brenda] “Well done Tom. Can’t believe someone else has finally cooked them.”

The casserole tastes grand.

But the meatballs are too salty.

That’s a shame.

[Tom] “Someone’s going to come in to a rather unpleasant answerphone message in the morning!”

Steady on there Tom.

That’s fighting talk, that is.

The Archers Tuesday 20th September 2011: Chris and Brian’s candlesticks

• Debbie is just outside Basingstoke
• Peggy has a sore head
• Chris had an odd request
• At a new tea room near Darrington
• Alice posing online
• Enamel, decisions and a cloakroom

Debbie is just outside Basingstoke

Looking at more super dairies.

She’s really serious about it, then.


Peggy has a sore head

Oh dear. I hope this isn’t the start of something …

Peggy is very stressed.

Jack is out of hospital, and back at The laurels, but it hasn’t made life any easier for Peggy.

He’s very “needy”, hasn’t settled, is confused and can’t eat properly as his grip hasn’t improved.

Elona is the only other person who can calm Jack, so Peggy is having to spend most of her day at The Laurels looking after Jack.

[Jennifer] “You can’t do that every day mum,. You must make some space for yourself, or you’ll tire yourself out”

[Peggy] “Easier said than done I’m afraid … if you saw the way his face lights up when he sees me, it warms your heart, it really does”

Worried that Peggy also isn’t eating properly (she had beans on toast for breakfast … the shame!), Jennifer persuades her to partake of her beef casserole supper that evening.


Chris had an odd request

[Chris] “I’ve got a favour to ask, it might seem a bit strange …you know that candlestick you’ve got on the landing near Ruairi’s room, do you think I could have a quick look and maybe take a photo?”

Jennifer and Brian consent.

[Chris] “It’s heavy …”

[Brian] “I used to used it to prop open my office door”

Turns out Chris wants to copy the candlestick, so that he can “knock one up” in his forge (out of steel). Seems Alice has a very warm liking for it.

Aw. What a sweet (relatively) newlywed chap he is.


Alice posing online

Jennifer is aghast!

Seems Alice is selling some of her clothes online (EBay, one would imagine).

[Brian] “And there will be pictures, I suppose … Jennifer is a touch worried about that”

[Chris] “Tell her Alice isn’t going to be wearing them .. it’s a thought though. We might do much better if she did”

At a new tea room near Darrington

The new tea room is where Jennifer takes Jill on her (Elizabeth’s) first day back driving.

Jill does approve of the tea room. It has “lovely China” (which Jill thinks make all the difference) and also has lovely cakes.

Then – they play a game of Jill mentioning David, while Elizabeth ignores such mentions and then changes the subject.

Elizabeth asks about Pip’s trip away – she ignores Jill’s mention of seeing Pip when she went over for David’s birthday.

Elizabeth talks about Pip and Spencer, and Pip going to Uni – she ignores Jill’s mention of David being proud of Pip - and wanting her to be able to stay farming at Brookfield.

Elizabeth then talks about Freddie looking forward to going hunting, even though she knows Jill doesn’t approve of hunting. Jill would rather Freddie was just happy riding in the ring.


Enamel, decisions and a cloakroom

Peggy manages to make it to Jennifer and Brian for supper.

She’s still tired.

Seems Ted’s been irritating her – continually asking what enamel she’s putting into the flower and produce show. One, according to Peggy, is as she wants it to be – the other is a bit “abstract … a splodge of different colours”. Any anyway, Peggy doesn’t feel like making decisions right now,

In fact, she’s so tired and worn down that she asks Brian to drive her home before she’s had any supper.

Poor Peggy.

(but she does still call a cloakroom a cloakroom. Wonderful).

The Archers Sunday 11th September 2011: Debbie has a Super plan

• Debbie returns – yay!
• Does Jennifer think everyone who shops in Lidl has rickets?
• Poor Jack has lost his grip
• Peggy has faith in Tom and Helen
• Peggy forgets about church, shock!
• Brian is something beginning with A
• Super Dairy in Ambridge?
• Peggy isn’t hearing Tony

Debbie returns – yay!

I think Debbie got all of the nice genes Jennifer had left, before she went on to have Kate.

(or it’s just Brian’s involvement that explains the vileness that is Kate).

First thing we hear from Debbie is that she want to go and see Jack.

What a nice thoughtful lass she is.


Does Jennifer think everyone who shops in Lidl has rickets?

Alice and Chris are saving £1,000 a month

Blimey. What on earth was in their shopping basket before they were saving?

Brian and Debbie are impressed, but Jennifer isn’t having it.

[Jennifer] “Not if it means compromising their health”

[Debbie] “She seems a lot happier to me, Alice, certainly since she first got back from Southampton … the two of them working as a team, with a definite goal”

Poor Jack has lost his grip

Although Jack is now up and walking, he now can’t find himself as he hasn’t got the grip.

That might get better with time and therapy, but it’s distressing for both Jack and Peggy.

Peggy is still worried about whether the Laurels will take Jack back. Seems one of their Nursing Supervisors has to make an assessment of Jack.


Peggy has faith in Tom and Helen 

Peggy reckons Tony is looking a bit peaky, which he isn’t offended about as he hasn’t been sleeping.

He’s also sounding none too positive about Bridge Farm.

[Peggy] “You’ve got one marvellous asset, you and Pat, those two youngsters of yours. I’ve got a lot of belief in those two. They’ve got their heads screwed on. They’ll find a way out of this, you’ll see”

Peggy forgets about church, shock!

Jennifer turns up to take Peggy to St Stephen’s, but Peggy has forgotten.

It is actually a shock.

Peggy really is most terribly worried about Jack.


Brian is something beginning with A

Brian reckons it is ‘Alpha’. A few of use might choose a completely different word …

[Brian, talking to Debbie about the Mart] “I wouldn’t say I was a particularly power hungry individual, well no more than the average alpha male … but there were times when this was going on when I would have cheerfully declared martial law”

[Debbie] “I’ve got to hand it to you, at an age when most men wouldn’t be thinking beyond the golf course …”

Super Dairy in Ambridge?

Maybe so, if Debbie gets her way.

She was harping onto Brian about something to do with “generic merit and meat blood lines”

Seems she’s thinking of a large scale dairy enterprise – but not in Hungry, “closer to home”.

Seems she reckons she can solve Brian’s weakness, or his:

[Brian] “exposure to volatile commodity”

(hmmm … is that what he calls it these days?)

Debbie’s great plan is:

[Debbie] “Dairy farming, but not the way David and Ruth do it, I’m talking big scale 2 1st century fairy where you control your costs and maximise your output”

[Brian] “A super diary?”

[Debbie] “If that’s you want to call it that …”

Seems a super dairy is a way of not having to rely on world prices.

You get 1,000 cows in a “light and airy shed”. On sand. With vets and experts on to look after them 24/7.

Their slurry goes to an AD unit which sells to the grid. The Digestate goes back to the land, to grown more stuff. It’s sustainable. The cows are feed entirely from everything grown on their own land.

Or the alternative for Brian?

[Debbie] “Maybe you like marketing your crops like betting in a roulette wheel?”

Well, if Debbie puts it that way – stand back for the Super Diary Vs Lynda bun fight.

Or, will Debbie and Brian listen to Tony?

[Tony] “Our whole dairy business has gone belly up …

“The power of all this, it’s frightening, go on the internet and their pages upon of pages about out poisonous products …

“ … what I wouldn’t give in your position Brian, put it all to arable, we could have the whole lot done by contractor s and Pat and I could get our lives back again

“ … why anyone in their right mind would want to get into dairy farming is beyond me”

Will they listen?

Heck no!


Peggy isn’t hearing Tony

Tony starts to tell Peggy about his and Pat’s cashflow problem, but she can only think of Jack.

Looks like the bank of Peggy isn’t necessarily closed. It’s just popped out for a bit to something more important.

The Archers Friday 9th September 2011: Peggy is being pessimistic … or “realistic?”

• Jill is thankful
• Ruth doesn’t know the head from the tail
• Phoebe gone, Debbie on her way
• Lily is a jolly hockey, Freddie got lost and Ruairi’s on email
• Laser Fray?
• Peggy is a tad maudlin

Jill is thankful 

Jennifer’s telling Jill about Jack being in hospital.

She reckons Peggy is “being brave but is worried”, and Jack is “very alarmed and difficult”

[Jill] “I’ve always felt how blessed Phil was, keeping his health until the very end”

Indeed. I’d be very glad indeed to have as dignified and quiet end as our Phil did.


Ruth doesn’t know the head from the tail

Well, she does. She’s just winding Pip up.

Pip’s actually stopped talking about marketing strategies and social networking (hurrah!), but is now onto more practical advice.

Someone called Chad seemed to have sold her on the idea of new farming methods (he was a salesman at the New Smithsfield), so she’s not telling Ruth what’s what.

Chad’s suggestion of “intensive, mainly indoors” cows doesn’t suit Brookfield at all, but Pip reckons they should get a nutritionist for the cows.

Ruth reckons they do just fine, without the Cow equivalent of Gillian Mckeith

[Ruth] “Before you go Pip, can you remind me, which is the calf’s head and which is the tail?”

As much as Pip seems to be irritating Ruth, Ruth is glad that Pip has enthusiasm. Seems David was exactly the same way with Phil.


Phoebe gone, Debbie on her way

[Jennifer] “Brian’s right, you know. As soon as one’s gone, one comes back”

Seems Phoebe got to South Africa just fine, and Debbie’s coming back for 10 whole days.

Looks like Jennifer isn’t going to have time to twiddle her thumbs after all.


Lily is a jolly hockey, Freddie got lost and Ruairi’s on email

So all the wee Archer kids have been packed off to their respective private schools.

I think it’s very odd that a wee 9 year old has an email address to contact his parents. Why aren’t they allowed mobiles? Surely that would help Ruairi get over any homesickness – that he can call his folks at any time.

But, sounds like he has settled in. Jennifer also seems calmer.

Freddie and Lily are, according to Elizabeth, also getting ion grand at the Cathedral school

Lily has joined the drama and art club, and is going for the hockey trials.

[Elizabeth] “I just think she likes the idea of running round biffing people with a stick”

And Freddie?

[Elizabeth] “He’s fine, doing things in his own sweet way as usual”

He hasn’t joined any clubs yet – Elizabeth reckons he’s exploring first.

Seems he has a new mate, Lochlan, who also enjoys exploring. They both got lost the other day in the school grounds when trying to keep up with a goldfinch (!). But Daniel found them, so all was well.

[Elizabeth] “Freddie though it was a terrific hoot. He really is his father’s son”

Freddie’s more interested in the Pony Clun than his school. But he and Lily don’t get much time to really escape – they get home, have a wee break, have their tea, then back onto their homework. Not much of a carefree life for a 12 year old, is it?


Laser Fray?

Jill wasn’t too sure what that was – I’m also not too sure myself.

Is it just a laser quest type thing?

Either way – all the kids are going out next Tuesday to it, for Josh’s birthday.

Again – Freddie and Lily don’t get much of a break. They have to be home by 8pm as it’s a school night.


Peggy is a tad maudlin

Actually – maybe maudlin isn’t the right word. She just seems to be accepting that Jack’s stroke could be the start of the end.

Jennifer thinks it is “encouraging” that he ‘only’ had a mild stroke.

[Peggy] “Hardly encouraging, dear … it’s affected his face and hand. All of his left side …

"This has all been so frightening for him …The plain fact is. He’s not a well man … he’s started on a journey which, no matter how long it takes, can only have one destination”"

[Jennifer] “It’s the same for all of us, isn’t it mum?”

[Peggy] “Yes … above all, I want the last part of jack’s life to be peaceful and happy … suppose after this the Laurel’s doesn’t feel able to look after him? … and if they won’t take him after he’s discharged, what on earth is going to happen to him?”

Back at home, with Elona working for Peggy full time (if Peggy can persuade her to stay)?

Poor Jack, and poor Peggy.

As I said above, if only we could all go quickly and quietly, like Phil.

The Archers Thursday 8th September 2011: Jack has a stroke

• “you look like you’ve been blown up with a bicycle pump”
• Jack’s really angry
• Roy isn’t coping

“you look like you’ve been blown up with a bicycle pump”

JLS makes Phoebe feel at home.

I suppose she’s just that sort of age – where having a poster of one’s favourite pop band is so very, very important.

Phoebe seems to still be trying to take everything she owns with her to South Africa.

[Hayley] “It will be here when you get home, everything will be the same … but what’s wrong with you, you look like you’ve been blown up with a bicycle pump”

Seems Phoebe is trying to get round the baggage allowance by wearing multiple t-shirts, and such. All the clothes she sees as special, especially the ones she’s been given by her nearest and dearest.

[Phoebe] “It doesn’t matter, I just look a bit fat”

Very admirable that a young lass isn’t worried about looking plump – but Hayley isn’t having it. She reckons Phoebe will pass out from overheating.

Roy starts shouting up for them to get a move on. Phoebe has a plane to catch.

[Hayley] “Just a slight wardrobe malfunction to sort out …”


Jack’s really angry

Tony gets to Peggy’s, to ask her for a loan, but finds her very upset.

She comes on the phone and asks Tony to take her to the hospital straight away.

Seems the care home found Jack slumped in his chair, and he was too drowsy and weak to be roused.

Tony later tells Pat, from the hospital, that it is probably a stroke:

[Tony] “When you see his face, it’s like when mum had hers, his face is fallen on one side”

Which is bad enough – but it’s also hard to tell if Jack is in pain. He can’t talk properly, and his reactions and communication is obviously affected by his Alzheimers.

[Tony] “I think he’s angry, being prodded and poked at … he hasn’t any real idea what’s happening”

[Peggy] “He’s so unhappy. He kept trying to push my hand away … when this happened to me, it was such a horrible experience, a complete bolt out of the blue, being out of control, the awful feeling in your head … and at least I had some idea of what was going on, but poor Jack …”

When Tony gets home (Peggy’s also at home, with Lilian probably staying over), he doesn’t want his dinner.

Not even a cuppa.

Pat seems to start to ask whether he asked Peggy about the loan … her mind really can’t cope with anything else at the moment.

[Tony] “There was no way I could ask about a loan … we’ll just have to battle on, manage on our own somehow, only goodness knows how we’ll do it”

Oh dear.

Disaster all round.


Roy isn’t coping

When they finally get Phoebe to the airport, there’s lots of loving and hugs.

Phoebe is told to text them as soon as she arrives (that’ll cost a fortune, by the way), and to SKYPE that evening (the mention of SKYPE proves that The Archers are Real … the BBC wouldn’t script a mention of a brand …).

[Hayley] “Look at her … I swear she still has extra leggings on … I only hope she doesn’t have to go to the loo in a hurry …”

Hayley’s interrupted by huge sobs from Roy, as he watches Phoebe leaved them.

[Roy] “Our little girl … I never thought … it’d be so hard to let go”

Poor Roy.

He’ll miss Phoebe.

I only hope that when she returns, she isn’t a mini-Kate …

The Archers Tuesday 19th July 2011: Jack’s 92nd birthday

• It’s all about Eddie
• Tom’s back
• Jack’s back … for how long?
• He cancelled the sausage order!
• Eddie was drunk in charge of the sausages
• Clarrie passed the 48hr rule …
• … or did she?

It’s all about Eddie

I hate to say this – Eddie is normally just an amiable rogue - but Eddie seems to be become quite a nastily selfish bloke, these days.

He comes into the kitchen to find Clarrie sat in a puddle of doom (she hasn’t slept all night), and says:

[Eddie] “Thought you’d be having a lie in, that’s what I’d do if I had the day off … getting paid for not working. Make the most of it, eh”

Which I suppose you could say is Eddie just trying to cheer Clarrie up, by making light of a horrible situation. One thing that Bridge Farm is under suspicion of E. coli – another that Clarrie thinks it’s her fault. Because she’d been ill. And she’d gone back to work.

But, what Eddie hears is Clarrie blaming him. When she mentions that she w ants to see Pat to explain, Eddie comes out with:

[Eddie] “What, about how I poisoned you with an undercooked sausage … don’t the point the finger at me!”

Um, she didn’t. Clarrie never mentioned blame, nor sausages.

The bloke doth protest too much.


Tom’s back

I suppose he is quite useful at times of stress and crises. He does tend to just buckle down and get things sorted.

Wonder if he’s also become less smug since he’s been away from the secret microphones … here’s hoping.

He’s also brought Brenda back with him (not in person – just her considered professional advice).

Brenda reckons “mud sticks” (really? I wouldn’t have thought of that one. Well worth the years at uni …)

[Tom, relaying Brenda’s advice] “Minimise the damage … don’t mention e. coli … don’t mention even mention that we’ve had an environmental health inspection”

But there seems to be little point in trying to keep it hush hush. Even worrying about Susan blabbing is pointless.

Bridge Farm has to put a product recall in the Echo.

Oh dear.


Jack’s back … for how long?

Well, not really …

But still sort of nice to hear to hear jack again. At the same time, it was heart-breaking …

[Peggy] “hello Jack”

[Jack] “hello”

[Peggy] “It’s me, Peggy”

[jack] “Yes, Peggy, how nice to see you”

[Peggy] “ … it’s your birthday … you’re 92 …”

[Jack] “No … how much., how many?”

[Peggy] “Happy birthday Jack”

[Jack] “Happy birthday jack … that’s me. I’m jack”

And he kept repeating “you’re Peggy”. And this was probably what they call one of his good days.

Still, jack loved the enamelled tie pin that Peggy had made him.

So Jack had a lovely birthday. He even said he reckoned he was lucky as he got so many cards from so many friends.

But I really really dislike suggesting this … was this the last from Jack?


He cancelled the sausage order!

Honestly, who does he think he is?

[Tom] “That man Somerville .. he’s such a prima donna … he acted like we were doing this deliberately to tarnish the Underwood’s name and as a personal insult to him … he’s even cancelled the sausage order”

Even when he couldn’t return any sausages (even though he wanted to) because he’d sold out.

Honestly. Some people.



Eddie was drunk in charge of the sausages

Hmmmm.

The plot does thicken.



Clarrie passed the 48hr rule …

[Pat] “This particular bug, if you catch it, the average incubation is 3 to 5 days”

So they reckon Clarrie is in the clear> Especially as she only went back to work 48 hours after she felt ill/

Clarrie passed the 48 hour rule


… or did she?

Every helpful Eddie points out to Clarrie (after pat has gone) that she was still ill on the Saturday. So she wasn’t 48 hours clear when she went back to work.

Clarrie seemingly had to rush to the toilet when the tennis (aye – that Andy Murray game) got to match point.

Ever thicker still, that plot.

The Archers Tuesday 12th July 2011: Where’s Captain?

• “Jonti, the disappearing IT wizard”
• Jack looking for Captain
• Jamie feels like Borchester’s most wanted
• It should have been me …
• Who will be gifted Jill’s brooch?

“Jonti, the disappearing IT wizard”

So says Lilian.

It would seem Jonti came, created lots of noise, then left.

[Lilian] “Left me with a rubber cheque … this smells like a moonlight flit … undernourished, geeker glasses not too fussy about his personal hygiene …”

[Fallon] “Oh, with the dog you mean?”

[Lilian] “And the motorbike”

[Fallon] “Not very popular with the neighbours, is he?”

Seems even Bert Horrobin didn’t have a good word to say to him (I didn’t know Bert Horrobin was even still alive …).

Not only has Jonti bumped Lilian, but he’s also not paid his milk bill.

Terrible.

[Lilian] “The place looks like it’s been camped in by a bunch of Hells Angels …”

(actually – Hells Angels are quite peaceable chaps these days)

Harry seemed shocked at the thought of oil on the carpet, but Lilian is already trying to move on. She has Jonti’s deposit, is going to get it professionally cleaned, and will look for a new tenant. Though:

[Lilian] “The next one is going to need references from the Bishop of Felpersham”

Jack looking for Captain

Peggy and Lilian arrive to find Jack outside on his own, looking for his dog.

Jack realises that Captain isn’t there. So goes off to find him. Can’t find him. Gets anxious and upset. He’s told that Captain died years ago. He gets upset again. Then forgets what he’s just been told.

Difficult, for everyone.

But at least Peggy has Elona, who even makes her tea when she’s on her break.


Jamie feels like Borchester’s most wanted

[Jamie] “Mrs Noakes crosses the road … getting a few funny looks”

Everyone knows about the car stealing and crash – Jamie feels marked even though he wasn’t really involved.

He tells Fallon that he’s heard from Marty – but hasn’t heard from Steve.

[Jamie] “That suits me fine … never again. I always knew he was an idiot”

[Fallon] “Live and learn, eh?”

Would seem so.


It should have been me …

… is probably a song ( by Yvonne Fair) that Fallon should be singing right now

Spotting Harry coming along the road:

[Lilian, to Fallon] “His new totty, darling … quite a little bombshell, isn’t she, do you think she can handle her (chortle). Such a sweet boy, I’d hate to see him get his fingers burnt (chortle) if you see what you mean (chortle)”

(goodness, I love a good Lilian guffaw!)

I didn’t quite see what Lilian meant, and Fallon also didn’t seem too impressed.

Hmmm.

Harry then asks if he can ask Fallon for some personal advice:

[Harry] “Can I have the benefit of your worldly wisdom, for a minute … it is a little bit delicate …”

He asks her where he should take Zofia out for a nice meal. He reckons Fallon is the “gourmet queen”. (really?)

Fallon does tell him where to go (in a nice way – she gives him the advice he seeks), but she sounds a bit reticent. A bit sad. A wee bit upset.

Hmmmm indeed.


Who will be gifted Jill’s brooch?

I am still on about the ‘brooch of doom’ (Nigel gave Elizabeth a brooch just before he died).

Seems Peggy and Jill were enamelling at ted’s again. Jill has made a brooch (doom!), and Peggy is thinking about making a tie pin for Jack’s birthday next week.

Elona said something a bit odd:

[Elona] “You musn’t let Jill do better than you”

Suppose Peggy is talking to Elona is a far more intimate way that one would suppose.

The Archers Thursday 7th July 2011: Ruth chooses David over Elizabeth

• David really is a happy chappy
• Rhys is in with the big boys!
• So no battle move the village shop flat?
• I’ll bet Peggy hasn’t been called that before
• Elizabeth won’t hear it
• Jack, Aunty Gaynor and Uncle Trevor
• Freddie’s going through a gory stage
• “Someone’s left some cheese in the fridge”
• Brookfield = machinery = hurt twins
• The Famous 3
• Ruth’s staying positive

David really is a happy chappy

It would seem the Borchester Show did wonders for David.

Ruth reckons she hasn’t seen David so relaxed for ages.

[Ruth] “He had a whole day when it was impossible to focus on his own problems”

And he was so chuffed that Pip was showing initiative about networking, and talking to consultants.

So that’s the secret then.

Keep David on a dizzy round of NFU events, and all shall be well.



Rhys is in with the big boys!

Rhys has made it to the secret microphones of Ambridge, after being stuck in the rather bizarre world of Ambridge Extra.

Wonder if Chas will also make it through …



So no battle move the village shop flat?

I suppose not.

Chris is settled with Alice. Fallon likely wouldn’t want to leave Jolene (though wouldn’t that be better than seeing her and Kenton snogging on the sofa every night?). And Helen has moved back home.

So, that just leaves Rhys.

[Rhys] “I think I’ll take it. I’ve got a feeling I’m going to be very happy here”

So Rhys. If you’re staying, can we know your surname?


I’ll bet Peggy hasn’t been called that before

[Rhys] “Elderly lady? Computer literate”

Elizabeth won’t hear it

[Elizabeth] “I want them to have a perfectly normal relationship with their cousins”

[Jill] “Well you say that Elizabeth, but it’s not as easy as it used to be, for anyone …”

But Elizabeth interrupts her and leaves to call a supplier, before Jill can get into full flow about how difficult her refusal to speak to David is for everyone. It’s even a bit of a faff taking the twins to Brookfield.


Jack, Aunty Gaynor and Uncle Trevor

Susan’s telling Rhys all about Jack Woolley – considering he made mention of Peggy – because he wants to have a look at the Village shop flat …

Honestly Susan. Any excuse.

After explaining how Jack use to own half the village, was clever, used to walk his dog and always had a kind word to say:

[Susan] “Now he doesn’t know the day of the week”

Seems Rhys’ Aunty Gaynor “went the same way”, and broke his Uncle Trevor’s heart.


Freddie’s going through a gory stage

Talking about going to see Pip’s prize winning lambs at Brookfield:

[Freddie] “We need to see them quick, before they get hauled off to the abattoir”

On being told that they all chosen for Butchers’ class as they looked alike:

[Freddie] “So that when the butchers chop them up, they’re all the same”

“Someone’s left some cheese in the fridge”

Not quite a cake in the rain, but more Helen’s style.

(the cheese was in the fridge of the Village shop flat)



Brookfield = machinery = hurt twins

They managed to not impale themselves this time, but I would have watched them like a hawk if I was Ruth.

Just imagine. Husband, and then also the kids.

I don’t think even Jill would forgive that.


The Famous 3

I thought Ben, Freddie and Lily were about to break out the lasing of ginger as they chatted.



Ruth’s staying positive

Jill started talking about the troubles between Elizabeth and David, but Ruth didn’t really want to go there:

[Ruth] “Still, there’s nothing to be done about it. How about we go in and have a cup of tea”

[Jill] “if only she and David could find some sort of reconciliation …”

[Ruth] “I’m not going to hold me breath. From now on, it’s this family and this farm that comes first from me … Elizabeth must do as she sees fit, but it's David I’m thinking about, he comes first, and that’s how it’s going to stay”

So that’s that then.

The Archers Sunday 17th April 2011: Elona is determined about Peggy and Ted

click the title above, or the 'read more' link below the bullet points, to read the full post on this eavesdropping episode

• Jack is enjoying his biscuits
• “To do any other than that would feel disloyal”
• Kathy’s worried
• Caroline’s not ready to retire
• Peggy still irons Jack’s shirts
• Peggy and Elona swap sayings
• I love it when the cows are turned out
• “Even though Jill gave us strict instructions!”
• Loos or Looms?

Jack is enjoying his biscuits

Especially as he can share them with the birds.

If it wasn’t for his ever decreasing mental facilities, Jack would be living a life of riley.


“To do any other than that would feel disloyal”

I’m not sure why Elona is so hell-bent on Ted and Peggy spending time together, but she is most definitely not letting it lie.

She sounds like a nice lady, so (I reckon) just wants to see Peggy have friendship and support with Ted (and vice versa).

She manages to get Peggy to admit that she’s avoiding Ted, as she hasn’t got any time for friends. What with her family … and also that she’s not sure how much time she actually has left with Jack.

Now that’s a heady mix of guilt and responsibility.

But in amongst all that – where’s Peggy’s time to lead her own life?

Also a pity that it’s taken ‘hired help’ to spot that Peggy needs a pal.

Elona does later persuade Peggy that she’s sure Ted doesn’t want more than friendship – and that:

[Elona] “Jack is in a place where … you wouldn’t hurt him … and would be happy for you to enjoy the company of friends”

Peggy sounds like she agrees.

I tell you what – Ted and Peggy are off/on more often than your average Z list celebs!


Kathy’s worried

Again.

Though she has taken Fallon's advice to heart (that she needs to give Jamie space while he still knows she’s there for him), she’s concerned it will take as long for her and Jamie to make up as it did for Fallon and Wayne. They took 3 whole years.

[Clarrie] “Wayne’s a very different person to you Kathy”

And how!

I don’t think Kathy needs to worry too much. Jamie will be back. Fallon and Jolene will soon catch him stealing from The Bull …

And if Clarrie and Eddie’s experience with Ed is anything to go by, even those that wander off far and wide come back to home eventually.


Caroline’s not ready to retire

Oliver is not a happy man.

He handed over his herd to Ed Grundy so that he could retire, only to find his wife is not ready to enter the twice-yearly-cruise stage of life.

Caroline has decided that she won’t hire another manager – she’ll do it all.

Oliver reckons they should have made that decision together. He was enjoying spend more time with Caroline, and wanted her to step back from Grey Gables, rather than step forward (all because of that bloomin’ poaching madam Elizabeth!).

[Oliver] “You’ll be back to living to work rather than working to live”

Caroline reckons they have plenty of time to later retire and enjoy, but Oliver isn’t so sure.

[Oliver] “Well how much later? When you retire … at the time you retire, I might be in my 70s … I just don’t want us to miss out, that’s all”

(oo-er – that sounds a bit ominous. Oliver to die under a yard tractor soonish, leaving Caroline to mourn both him and her decision to choose work over retirement?)

But – Caroline is getting a “buzz” out of having Grey Gables completely under her control, and wants the challenge.

Do I also not recall that Oliver giving up his work so that he could have more time off, while also helping Caroline at Grey Gables?

Either way – they decide to give it 6 months to see if it will be fine, or too much, for Caroline.

Oliver will be marking the days …



Peggy still irons Jack’s shirts

How odd.

Could that side of the Archer clan not afford Jack an all-inclusive package?

Or does Peggy still want to take proper care of Jack, even though she can’t have him at home?


Peggy and Elona swap sayings

[Peggy] “Ne’er cast a clout till May is out …”

(though Peggy isn’t sure if that means until June, or when the Hawthorne blossoms. It’s the Hawthorne: http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/ne%27er_cast_a_clout_til_May_be_out)

[Elona] “A bag full of friendship is worth a wagon full of corn”

(I think Elona’s mum made that one up).




I love it when the cows are turned out

Caroline’s enjoying watching Ed’s “young stock” revealing in their first time outside.

It is a great thing to watch.

If you’ve never seen it – get yourself down to a farm. It's grand watching the newly born, but even better to watch the older ones when they first get let out after winter.

A grown cow, leaping and playing like a new born lamb.

Marvellous.



“Even though Jill gave us strict instructions!”

Clarrie’s shocked to be told by Peggy that Peggy has been baking extra cakes for the panel of Gardeners’ Question time.

But not as shocked as Peggy to find Jill at her front door, just as she's finishing her baking.

Jill is quite demanding.

To be let in.

To be made a cup of tea.

And that she is given a biscuit, out of the nearby biscuit tin.

Slightly panicking, Peggy says “no” to the biscuit. The biscuit tin is just an empty one.

[Jill, sounding suspicious] “Peggy. This feels very heavy …”

[Peggy, grumbling into admission, without really being pushed] “I couldn’t resist … your instructions on what we should and shouldn’t bake were quite draconian … and when I found out Bob Flowerdew prefers organic foods … I baked it especially for him”

I did suck in a lot of air when I heard Peggy call Jill ‘draconian’, but not to worry. Jill wasn’t at all annoyed, and they had a good giggle at Peggy trying to sneak cake into the green room.

Seemingly everyone’s been at it.


Loos or Looms?

Where did Jill say they’d especially put flowers in at the village hall for Gardeners’ Question time?

The Archers Thurs 31st March 2011: Monte Carlo

CLICK THE 'READ MORE' LINK BELOW THE BULLET POINTS TO READ THE FULL POST ON THIS EAVESDROPPING EPISODE

• It’s not Kathy that’s the problem
• Jamie is studying
• “Poor Lamb”
• Has Jennifer met her mistress?
• Was Jamie crying?
• Virginia Woolf reference
• Kathy won’t be bothered
• The first public kiss!

It’s not Kathy that’s the problem

Jolene reckons Jamie’s told Kathy about her and Kenton (why wouldn’t he?), so Jamie’s reluctance to see her/be at The Bull is down to Kathy not wanting him to do so.

Erm … I think it might have more to do with the fact that you’re stepping out with his stepdad, not that long after your husband – his dad – died.

Far closer to home, does the problem come from.



Jamie is studying

Jamie does go to see Fallon at The Bull, but asks her to help him study rather than watch a DVD.

If only Kathy knew, she might be a far calmer lady all round.


“Poor Lamb”

Would any of us have thought we’d see the day when the mighty Mr Jack Woolley was wetting himself like a child?

Later on, he didn’t want Jennifer to watch him eating his sandwich

Poor chap.

Lucky that he’s not really there to see it all.

At least Peggy’s still going strong.

[Peggy] “I thought I was getting feeble in my old age”

[Elona] “You, feeble? I don’t think so Mrs Woolley.”

Has Jennifer met her mistress?

I’m wondering if this Elona malarkey is just a red herring – but has Jennifer just meant Brian’s next love interest?


Was Jamie crying?

As Jamie leaves The Bull by the back door:

[Jamie] “I came this way as I thought you were in the bar”

[Jolene] “Bad luck …”

Jolene really is in the mood for apologies – mainly as she feels she has nothing to apologise for.

But now that she has Jamie cornered, she’s going to talk with him. Whether he wants to, or not.

Lamenting the huge change in their friendship recently:

[Jolene] “The difference must be because I’d started seeing Kenton”

[Jamie] “Oh, well done …Why Kenton? Why, with all the blokes out there, did it have to be him?”

[Jolene] “It’s partly because Kenton isn’t new, I knew him before as a friend, and course, he knew your dad as well”

[Jamie] “And he lived with my mum … doesn’t it make it kinda creepy?!?”

(yup Jamie – I reckon it is)

Jolene tells Jamie that she’ll always love Sid … and Jamie, because he’s part of Sid.

Now, I’m sure I heard Jamie quietly crying in the background, but Jolene didn’t seem to notice, and certainly didn’t mention that he’d cried when she was speaking later to Fallon.

Odd.

Anyway – looks like Jolene’s struck a chord.

Jamie and her are pals again.


Virginia Woolf reference

Elona’s telling Jennifer about her daughters (while Jennifer has to leave Jack and Peggy, eating his sandwich).

Her daughters are Anna (13) and Rosa (16).

Anna is pianist (or at least, quote good at piano), but Rosa was made out to be a bit thick.

But:

[Elona] “If you ask her, what she says she wants most is a room of her own”

I wonder.

Is it Elona or Rosa who has got to grips with Virginia Woolf?



Kathy won’t be bothered

Jolene reckons that Kathy won’t be that bothered about her seeing Kenton.

Eh?

[Fallon] “Even so, for her, it’s like history repeating itself”

Quite right Fallon.



The first public kiss!

Kenton’s all very excited about a present he’s got for Jolene.

Turns out to be a book on Monte Carlo.

Jolene’s a bit slow to get the point:

[Jolene] “It’s a little bit random, isn’t it?”

Course – Kenton’s gifting a trip to Monte Carlo. Three whole days.

[Kenton] “Seemed liked your kinda town, baby”

[Jolene] “And how! Oh you gorgeous man!”

And they have their first public kiss.

Aw!

To be cynical for just one moment – if Kenton is basically trying to get his leg over, that’s quite an expensive way of achieving it.

Jolene has already expressed her consent.

But, to not be cynical, maybe Kenton just wants to go that extra bit further to make it all unique and special (well, he has to do something to ensure he’s not going to be compared to Sid!)

[Kenton] “You’ll need something smart for the casino, but for the rest of the time ….”

I’m telling you – shower scene ahoy!!!

The Archers Fri 11th March 2011: Elizabeth has a heart attack?

• Tears and tantrums over Topper
• Supergran!
• What inclination will Henry be?
• Warm welcome back, Peggy
• Elona from Albania
• Nope, Elizabeth can’t calm down
• “My heart’s beating so fast … please help me … I can’t leave my children”

Tears and tantrums over Topper

Freddie really wasn’t coping at all well with Topper heading off to his new owner.

Screaming and tears – the wee chap really didn’t want Nigel’s hunter to go.

Nigel … General Custard … Topper … Freddie really can’t be blamed for thinking everyone eventually leaves.



Supergran!

Jill is one very handy lady to have round.

She utterly took control when Freddie was being a tad over emotional about Topper – and Lily then joined in to shout at Freddie for getting them both into trouble.

Whereas Elizabeth wanted to mollycoddle them, Jill took charge to make sure they know what was what.

[Jill] “They’ve both been very disobedient, and they’ll both be going to school … not another word, off you go!”

Jill’s theory was that the sooner they were at school, the sooner their mind would be taken off of Topper.

Tough love, but someone has to.


What inclination will Henry be?

Tony sounds hopeful that Henry will take to farming, but Helen points out that Henry is simply focused on trying to make his neck work!

[Tony] “Make sure the o ring comes with it .. .you’re never too young to learn tractor servicing”

But Tony does make a near slip-up when he nearly wonders aloud about what traits Henry will have taken from his biological father.

[Tony] “Be interesting to know what his … what he will end up doing”

Nature versus Nurture? Even if Henry’s father was around, I doubt Helen would let any influence other than her own really take hold of Henry.


Warm welcome back, Peggy

I do like our Peggy.

She’s been a bit silent since Henry was born, but she’s now right back in there – being a great-gran in every way she should. Not a word of her previous disapproval.

She even brings Helen Narcissus Tete a Tete.

Is it Spring for proper now?

(and Peggy - I was always get out the cups and saucers for you – matching, by the way – instead of a mug)


Elona from Albania

Lest we forget that Mr Jack Woolley is still on the go!

He’s relaxed this week, after having a tummy bug last week (so Jill tells us).

And his world is also a better and brighter place because of Elona from Albania.

She seemingly always makes time to speak to him, gets him the best seat in the day room AND has sorted his socks out!

No longer shall Jack’s socks be given to some woman called Jackie.

Phew!




Nope, Elizabeth can’t calm down

After Jill’s dropped the Twins off to school, she returns to find a rather het up Elizabeth.

[Jill] “Can you calm down, darling?”

Seemingly not.

Stressed out by Freddie’s tantrums over Topper, Elizabeth’s also stressed that Hugh has been awkward about Elizabeth not letting him hire in more casuals for the Orangery café.

[Elizabeth] “He was so sullen about it, it was infuriating”

Elizabeth’s also stressed that she can’t find the right information for a meeting she has to go to – all while Jill is trying to tell Elizabeth that she’s losing her temper.

Which is natural in the circumstances, but Jill is trying to suggest that Elizabeth needs to be more aware of what she’s doing to others as well as herself.

Then …

… Elizabeth’s losing her breath …

… sounds like a panic attached …

… her heart is racing, so Jill starts to call the doctor …

… but Elizabeth asks for an ambulance …


“My heart’s beating so fast … please help me … I can’t leave my children”

Crickey.

By the time David and Jill arrive at the hospital, they find that they have to go to resuscitation area.

And that’s where they left us.

No idea of what happened to Elizabeth after the ambulance folks took her in.

Elizabeth as well?

Surely not?

10th June 2010

• When is a farm open day not a visit to Steptoe and son?
• Seriously – watch out for Patrick!
• Right not to tell Jack about Sid?
• While Brenda’s away … Tom goes to his mum for his dinner

When is a farm open day not a visit to Steptoe and son?

When Clarrie gets involved.

Sounds like she’s managing her menfolk well enough, but how long before she ends up having to ‘clear up’ after them?

Will she have to pry Vicky and Joe apart when Vicky realises that her cut is only a percentage of the takings that Joe admits to (the main bulk of it being hidden under a cider barrel)?

Will their campers revolt after finding themselves stuck in the middle of an open day when they expected a quiet retreat?

Will Joe finally get caught by the Police selling alcohol without a licence?

Waiting with each anticipation …


Seriously – watch out for Patrick!

He keeps being mentioned, and is a regular visit to Bridge Farm.

Patrick’s now become my ‘next man for Helen’ about Greg from Wales, the Veg Man’s son and Harry.


Right not to tell Jack about Sid?

I think that Peggy and Lilian were right not to mention Sid’s death to Jack.

After all – what would it achieve? Does Jack even remember Sid?


While Brenda’s away … Tom goes to his mum for his dinner

Steady there Tom. You don’t want to have to readjust back to a normal, hum-drum life when Brenda returns to normal life.

Mind you, that should be ‘if’ Brenda returns …

30th April 2010

• I Want To Hold Your Hand
• It might be Matt that sounds the death knell

I Want To Hold Your Hand

Ah well – after all those years “trying to hold onto him”, Jack seems settled with his new lady friend.

At least Peggy has finally spoken to Ted again. If, as Ted said, at least Jack isn’t alone anymore – why should Peggy?

It might be Matt that sounds the death knell

Rather than Paul and Lilian’s efforts – it sounds like Matt is going to end up pushing Lilian away.

Silly boy. While I can understand that he wants to get back into his old life, does he have no clue about what he’s done to Lilian by racing down this path before?

Maybe he doesn’t care that much for her after all …

Anyway - did they or didn't they?

27th April 2010

• Stereotypes about builders
• Kenton tries it on with Kirsty
• Camp Grundy
• Wife Swap anyone?

Stereotypes about builders

Shame on you Kirsty. Of course they can help it!

And don’t builders now have to go on equality training?


Kenton tries it on with Kirsty

He’d better watch his step on that one. Cheesestraw will not be one to cross if she has yet more work to do (and lest we forget that her hormones are probably about to shoot through the dairy roof soon!)

Camp Grundy

Joe has a point about ‘back to basics’.

Folks do pay good money to be in the middle of a field, with no facilities. And they’d pay even more good money to have Joe’s barn within cider-goggles stumbling distance.

Wife Swap anyone?

What a wee shame that was on Peggy.

She’s been nervous about bumping into Ted again (after he invited her to lunch), but Jack gets in their first by refusing to be separated from Ted’s wife.

I know. It’s not funny. But maybe it’s time for Peggy to accept her Jack is no longer there?

13th April 2010

• When Harry met Sandy
• And then Jazzer gets bumped!
• What’s so racy about a senior citizens lunch?
• Pip is a right pain in the ...

When Harry met Sandy

Well trying to send Harry into a situation where he was attacked by a wee dog, and then its owner, completely backfired on Jazzer.

Not only is Harry now that customer’s favourite milkman, but he’s proved to Jazzer again that he’s a top bloke, adored by women and dogs alike.

Jazzer needs to wind his neck in before he sets himself up for a massive fall.

This is all also suggestive that it’ll be Fallon to fall for Harry’s charms. Oh dear.


And then Jazzer gets bumped!

Jazzer must be losing his touch.

Just imagine – a woman so immune to his charms that she gives him a dud number and information about herself.

Ouch! Not good times in Jazzer world.

Maybe he needs to crack out a song to woo the ladies back in his direction.


What’s so racy about a senior citizens lunch?

Was it just me, or was that a massive overreaction from Peggy?

What’s so wrong with her and Ted having a spot of lunch together? Nothing as far as I can tell.

Or, is Peggy feeling an attraction to Ted that she feels she shouldn’t?

Or is it simply a case of her still not wanting to enjoy herself while Jack’s quality of life can’t ever be the same as hers?

Self denial where there’s no need.


Pip is a right pain in the ...

Enough said.