The Archers: A pig with a wheeze and a sheep with Orf … the cows are in for the winter … Pip’s all revved up for the Dance tomorrow … Jazzer’s first Panto rehearsal
- As winter sets in, the animals are feeling the strain
- At least Peggy is proud of Tom
- A great-grandmother who is more excited about energy plans
- Panto ‘snot’ moments #3
- Pip’s having to pull out the stops
- Phew! No more dark corner for Peggy
- Jill needs her hive (and attitude!) fixed
- “Madam Snell hasn’t driven you to the evil weed an all, has she?”
- Nathan Booth is in for it …
As winter sets in, the animals are feeling the strain
One of Tom’s pigs have a wheeze (though he doesn’t seemed to concerned about it), and one of David’s sheep might have orf.
While David might have to vaccinate his whole flock, Tom won’t let Jazzer take the pig in.
Tom could be right that it isn’t that serious, and Jazzer is obviously concerned about more than just a pig.
Especially as he even offered to work longer for no pay (which just isn’t like him at all!).
As Tom tried to illustrate in a very bad accent, Jazzer’s simply trying to avoid his first Panto rehearsal.
At least Peggy is proud of Tom
It has to be said that Tom is doing a good thing by trying to save Bridge Farm expense, but it’s the way he goes about it.
Tony’s only ever going to say ‘no’ to Tom’s ideas, because Tom only ever makes him feel old fashioned or daft for not having made the changes before.
And even Jazzer’s losing his temper with his over-eager approach:
“I could die of extreme old age before I ever gave a damn about your yard lighting”
Which was a bit harsh of Jazzer, but he’s likely had enough of Tom going on and on and on and on and on …
But good old Peggy is at least being nice and excited about Tom’s plans.
“So refreshing to hear someone with a clear plan for that farm”
But – Peggy does still manage to slip Con into the conversation (she mentioned she’d been telling Con about Tom’s plans).
A great-grandmother who is more excited about energy plans
As much as I have a very soft spot for Peggy, and am glad she’s finding a wee bit of happiness through Con, it’s very off-putting that she still can’t find any joy for Helen’s pregnancy.
As she was talking to Tom about the email she’d sent back to Con, she quickly changed the subject when Tom asked her if she’d mentioned that she was about to become a great-grandmother.
That’s a shame. On Helen, and on her soon-to-be little one.
Do we reckon both Peggy and Tony will come round once they get to actually hold the new addition to their clan?
Panto ‘snot’ moments #3
[David] “I had the dolphin’s speech off by heart – couldn’t get beyond ‘we’re talking at cross porpoises’”
Pip’s having to pull out the stops
Oh dear.
That church organ doesn’t sound a friendly fella at all.
Pip’s struggling to learn the piece for the Advent Service, but likely all will be well in the end.
Especially as it’s a tribute for Phil.
Phew! No more dark corner for Peggy
Seemingly it was only a pulled wire, which Tom sorted out (and then was rewarded with a can or lager).
Seemingly that ever naughty Bill was the culprit (despite no real evidence).
Something had given the light a right thump.
But could it have been Ben???
Jill needs her hive (and attitude!) fixed
As Peggy needed her family to help fix her dark corner, Jill needs the roof of one of her hives fixed.
Which is fair enough, but what a horrid attitude she’s got towards Peggy and Con.
Jill needs her bee hive roof to be fixed
[Peggy] “I do still find it odd … how excited she is about Con’s email … even though he made things so difficult for her last time … if it had been Phil … it would have been disloyal”
[David] “All Peggy’s going through, it must be nice to have someone else to think about for once”
Quite right David. Jill is also going through a horrible round of ‘firsts’ without Phil, but she could at least be happy that Peggy is happy.
And let’s face it – Jack isn’t exactly going to notice Peggy sending a few emails …
“Madam Snell hasn’t driven you to the evil weed an all, has she?”
It’s Jazzer’s first Panto rehearsal, and he’s already having a fag break.
Eddie stumbles into him in the dark, as he also escapes.
But it’s not Lynda that’s the problem – it’s that rascal Nathan Booth.
Nathan’s really winding Eddie up by saying his lines early, upstaging him (surely not possible?) and pulling funny faces.
[Jazzer] “If you were Nathan Booth, wouldn’t you want to try on a new face?”
Eddie then also has to put up with Jazzer being cheeky about his part in the Panto:
“All you ever say is ‘I’m a rat I’m a rat, what do you think of that?’”
But Jazzer’s soon forgiven as he hatches a crafty plan …
Nathan Booth is in for it …
Nathan’s been trying to get Joe’s race videos from Eddie so that he can clean up at the Race Evening.
Which Eddie is utterly appalled by Nathan’s plan, as the Race Evening is in aid of the British Legion.
[Jazzer] “Slippery than a butter deal that one”
was Jazzer’s estimation of Nathan.
[Jazzer] “Let’s be a bit smart about it – bout time wee weasely Nathan learned a lesson”
Nathan really ought to be shaking in his socks. What with a dynamic duo like Jazzer and Eddie on your case …
The Archers: Caroline’s uncle is still on the mend … Brian’s avoidance plans … Peggy’s cats are playing up …
- “I suppose we were really stretched last year with orphans”
- Lord Netherborne – a bit of a Peregrine
- Brian’s using whisky to escape
- Naughty Bill
- Des Penwell
- Con still excites Peggy
- Valda doesn’t solve anything
- What’s this about a “dark corner”?
- Does Jill disapprove?
- “The theatrical equivalent of The Titanic”
“I suppose we were really stretched last year with orphans”
The harsh reality of sheep farming, courtesy of Adam.
“You don’t want too much tangle round the pens”
“Now, are you ready to go flying up to the roof?”
The harsh reality of Adam’s arming life, courtesy of Brian.
Lord Netherborne – a bit of a Peregrine
Well, not really.
It’s just that it was mentioned yet again that Caroline still has to look after her uncle.
Like the Peregrines were often mentioned without any obvious point – then become a ‘hot’, contentious issue – Lord Netherborne being poorly keeps cropping up.
Watch this space …
Brian’s using whisky to escape
And what’s really bad, is that he’s using booze to escape his own son’s birthday party!
Ian’s going to entertain as the great … something or other (did anyone catch that?). I’m assuming it’s a magic show.
But Brian is only going to:
“show willing where he has to”
Poor wee Ruairi.
His mum’s dead.
He dad would prefer alcohol to being at his party.
And even his step-brother-by-marriage is going to try and join Brian.
At least he’s got Jennifer and Kate making a fuss over him.
Actually. Scratch that. It’d probably be better if he was just utterly neglected.
Naughty Bill
Not sure why Peggy’s cats are being so hyper. She’s had to resort to locking them in the kitchen when she has guests over. Especially Bill.
The other day, Bill was clamouring all over Pat. And today he manages to break free of the kitchen to annoy Jill and Peggy.
Something in the air, or too much catnip?
Des Penwell
Is talking on Sunday, at the church, about his experiences in Afghanistan.
Con still excites Peggy
After all those years, and after she received his email on Saturday, Peggy is still giddy as a schoolgirl about Con.
But Jill doesn’t seem at all impressed (now there’s a surprise – Jill just can’t seem to muster any joy for anything which isn’t spot on ‘the norm’).
Valda doesn’t solve anything
[Lynda] “Strictly between you and me, she doesn’t thrive in the pressure cooker of pantomime – I always felt she never really made the grade in snow white”
So if Valda, Vicky and Sabrina aren’t up to playing Alice Fitzwilliam, just who is?
[Lynda] “Fallon and her sadly underused talent”
So while Hayley “does wonders with our little rats”, Phoebe show her artistic talents in designing the posters, Lynda is left to bemoan the lack of Fallon as her Alice.
At least Harry sorted Idle Jack.
Giving Lynda a “marvellous surprise” by turning up with Jazzer in tow, Lynda is utterly oblivious to (surely what must have bee) Jazzer’s utter reluctance.
[Lynda] “Whatever false modesty was holding him back, he’s over it now … very bashful … mumbled so much I had to make him repeat himself … I intimated him slightly …”
Lynda thought she’s ‘intimidated’ Jazzer because, when she suggested Harry’s idea of:
“Idle Jock, a comic Scotsman complete with mischievous kilt and a ginger wig”
Jazzer’s distaste was read by Lynda as
“Apparently it was a step too for his confidence … he gave me quite a look!”
I do adore our Lyndee, but she really doesn’t pick up on anything other than that she wants to see.
Harry has forced Jazzer to be in the Panto, but the line has been drawn through the concept of Idle Jock.
“Idle Jack remains … and I’m hoping to persuade him to sing”
Well, that’s great news.
Jazzer’s singing at Ambridge Has Talent was lovely, so I’ll look forward to hearing him again.
What’s this about a “dark corner”?
Am I missing something?
That was the second mention by Peggy that she has a dark corner.
Has the bulb blown?
Curtain can’t be pulled back?
What?
Whatever it is, Peggy needs someone to fix it for her.
She thinks it would be hard to find “someone for such a small job”, and doesn’t want to ask her family.
“Phil used to do that”
Said Jill, bring the conversation well and truly back to her.
I shouldn’t really be so harsh to Jill (even though she does ask for it sometimes), as it is going to be a tough first festive season without Phil.
But it felt like she was scoring points off of Peggy.
Jill’s one up because her husband is dead, whereas Peggy’s is still very much alive.
And then Jill behaves quite oddly about Peggy’s Con …
Does Jill disapprove?
It certainly seemed that way.
She wasn’t exactly glowing – or even happy for Peggy – when she read Con’s long letter as Peggy asked her to.
(and Peggy is quite right that a long email is just as good as a letter, though I still think the ‘ping’ of an email received isn’t quite like a non-bill thumping down on your doormat).
What’s wrong with Jill?
Can’t she see that Peggy has found a wee bit of harmless happiness?
So as Peggy (still in schoolgirl mode) dreamily talks about Florida and Ruby Throated Humming birds, all Jill found the effort to do was mention Jack.
Was that to bring Peggy back to reality with a bump?
Quite nasty, really.
[Peggy] “Living proof it’s never too late to develop an interest”
On yersel Peggy! Get it where you can …
“The theatrical equivalent of The Titanic”
Still stressing about the lack of a lady to lead as Alice, Lynda is getting desperate:
“If the worst comes to the worst … it’ll be the theatrical equivalent of the titanic … I might have to cast Sabrina”
Which everyone agrees would:
“Clear the hall … children and small animals crushed in the rush”
(I won’t even try to think why animals attend Ambridge’s Panto)
But then Lynda corners Fallon (after Clarrie planted the idea in her head the other day), and quite easily persuades her to prerecord Alice’s singing, to which Sabrina will mime.
Yet – it’s not over until Lyndee is utterly satisfied.
“What a better finish … you and Harry arm in arm … singing of love’s triumph”
Whether Fallon fell for the sheer joy of performing on a stage (any stage), or whether it was the mention of getting close to Harry that egged Fallon on, while she was most eager to do the pre-recordings, Fallon sounded even more keen to actually be in the Panto.
But there’s The Bull to run. And a rather wobbly Jolene to support.
So that’s that. Fallon can’t play love’s young dream because she has to keep home and hearth together.
But, what’s this …
[Jolene] “Maybe the challenge is just what I need … I want to try, love … just let me”
And there it is. Jolene finally steps up. Which means Fallon can live a little, by taking part in the village Panto.
My word – was Lynda nearly pornographic in her sheer delight at the news!
[Jolene] “I want to see my girl go to the ball”
[Lynda] “actually, technically that’s referring to another Panto”
(at which point Fallon or Jolene was heard to utter something very similar to ‘oh, shut up' though it was probably just ‘Lynda’)
[Lynda] “Oh what the heck … well done Fallon! you are coming to the ball after all!!”
Huzzah! Lynda will finally cease her woes about finding an Alice. Fallon gets to have a life out of the pub (and possibly get closer to Harry … though he does strike me as a rather sexless chap). And Jolene gets to see if she can really cope.
Trebles all round!
