- David’s jealous of Ben
- Inquest date is set
- Elizabeth admits she’s selfish!!!
- Kenton Vs Byron
- David wants it deep
- Will Pip be intensive?
- (Pancake) party at The Bull
- Dry or sweet?
David’s jealous of Ben
David’s wishing life could be as simple as Ben’s.
Ben is super excited about going out with his other wee-men mates for a pizza. And it’s as simple as that.
Birthday. Mates. Pizza.
You know David – that’s doable, even at your age.
Inquest date is set
March 29th, at 3.30pm.
Is David going down?
Elizabeth admits she’s selfish!!!
Blimey. That should have been uttered many, many years ago.
[Elizabeth] “I’ve been so selfish, using him here so much”
Mind you – it’s not entirely Elizabeth’s fault. David should have grown a pair and told Elizabeth he couldn’t help her so much way before he did.
Reality also seems to be sinking in about what a massive task Elizabeth has to take on without Nigel – though she still doesn’t seem to understand that she can hire someone in to share that burden.
[Elizabeth] “All the things Nigel used to do are my responsibility now. Time I got used to it”
Kenton Vs Byron
My money would be on Kenton. Hell hath no fury like a protective brother.
[Elizabeth] “I had a long and interesting chat with Byron Chambers .. .delightful chap … accused me of not honouring Nigel’s memory”
[Kenton] “I’d have sorted him out. Shown him what he could do with his cod piece”
I’d pay good money to see that, I would.
David wants it deep
Seemingly Chicory and Plantain would do the job.
All about improving the grazing, seemingly.
Will Pip be intensive?
As Pip and David ponder whether she’ll get into University, David’s also wondering if Pip will come back from (whatever education she gets into) thinking that Brookfield’s way are old fashioned.
Just like David thought of Phil. And Phil though of Dan.
[David] “(you) might be become one of the high input factory style brigade”
Interesting.
More interesting, though, is whether it will actually be Pip to take over at Brookfield.
I reckon Josh is still in with a shout. And we don’t even know about Ben as yet.
(Pancake) party at The Bull
So says Kenton.
And I love the way Kenton calls David ‘Dave’.
Almost as good as Joe’s ‘David Archer’
Dry or sweet?
Well my answer is always ‘cider, please’, but Elizabeth has to make up her mind for the next batch of Lower Loxley wines.
She’s well out of her depth when she visits the winery, but John is a nice enough chap who reassures that Nigel was just as worried when he first had to make decisions about the wine.
But as one of Nigel’s passions, Elizabeth is particularly nervous about making the wrong choice.
[Elizabeth] “Please John – what would Nigel have decided?"
- “I really need to be spending more time at Brookfield.”
- Helen’s life in one van
- Rolling, Heroin, Midsomer and Grass
- Release the cows!
- Being nasty to Lewis – nae need!
“I really need to be spending more time at Brookfield.”
Ah – what a relief it was to hear David finally (finally!) utter those words to Elizabeth.
Despite Lily waking up early everyday – and despite Elizabeth wanting David to have a look at the course for the chase (with Nigel’s Go-Getters) – David comes clean to Elizabeth:
[David] “Wouldn’t you be better asking Shula … I really need to be spending more time at Brookfield. Much more time …”
[Elizabeth, a tad shocked] “I completely understand … (you’re not letting me down) no, not at all …”
Elizabeth reckons that the breakdown she had on Friday did her the world of good (when she was told the Twins had got into the Cathedral School, which made her realise that Nigel won’t know anything about that, or anything else to do with the Twins anymore). She now thinks she’s “on top of things”.
Hmmm.
And when David asked if she’d make the call to the agency to get a professional manager, Elizabeth said she “very well get in touch”.
Double Hmmm.
Shortly after David left, Elizabeth went a tad ape at Lily for nattering on, trying to interrupt her when she was speaking to David.
I do think Lily was indeed being “very very rude”, but Elizabeth’s quick temper isn’t suggestive of someone who’s got control.
Helen’s life in one van
Helen’s moved back to Bridge Farm, and it only took one van.
I suppose DVDs do pack down quite neatly …
But then again, Helen won’t have packed everything, as she’s reckoning on only being home for a few weeks.
I do wonder if Tony will come up with another (heartfelt) reason for Helen to stay.
[Helen] “That’s why you’re different dad. No matter what I’m like,. I never drive you away”
Methinks it’ll be hard for Helen to drive away this time.
Rolling, Heroin, Midsomer and Grass
I must have been distracted when I thought I heard David and Pip talking about some “dead grass”. I’m sure I then heard David talking about how the grass will need to be rolled, but maybe some heroin first, and something about Midsomer.
Eh?
Please do correct me.
Release the cows!
[Ruth] “They’ll really benefit from an early bite”
Ruth’s spot on when she said that it means winter is nearly done when the cows go back out in the fields.
I reckon they’re just about relieved to get out as we all are to see they get out.
Here’s a video from a farm near to where I live (it also does cracking ice-cream and has an excellent visitor centre/nature walks/stuff to do). I can’t mention their name as tis blog is strictly non-commercial, but you can work it out from the video.
Hurrah to happy and playful cows!
Being nasty to Lewis – nae need!
I utterly accept Elizabeth is still going through a horrific time, but there is absolutely no excuse (on this whole wide world) for being nasty to our Lewis.
He’s a lovely gent.
Lewis was just trying to help out, by picking up a job that Elizabeth had seemed to forget, but Elizabeth repeated her ‘going ape’ routine on Lewis as she’d done to Lily.
Elizabeth reckons she:
[Elizabeth] “has to keep hold of all of the threads" herself
So shouts at Lewis for just being a nice chap.
She calms down, but mentions that life is about to get even more tricky for her.
She has to tell Byron Chambers that she’s about to cancel his Medieval Banquets as they’re making losses for Lower Loxley.
[Lewis] “(Byron Chambers] “The erasable gentleman with the unfortunate beard?”
[Elizabeth] “As you say, he’s got quite a temper. I’m dreading the meeting already.”
Ach – why deal with it alone Elizabeth?
- Mini pork pies
- Susan jealous of Clarrie?
- About last night
- Tony’s unconvincing ‘bad back’ routine
- “he doesn’t know”
Mini pork pies
[Susan] “Oh you’re right Clarrie, you can’t beat mini pork pies”
I quite agree.
But how very dare Susan and Clarrie agree that bought pies are just as good as homemade!
They should be ashamed of themselves.
Seemingly Joe “goes mad” for pasties (well, don’t suppose he gets out these days).
And picnics are better when you don’t have to do chopping “and the like”. Far too messy.
Susan jealous of Clarrie?
Having a right old natter while potting the yoghurts, Susan’s chatting about how Emma seems to have gone off the name Scarlett if she has a girl. Susan’s a bit perplexed, as Emma and Ed seemed to really want that name.
So it’s no coincidence Emma changed her mind about Scarlett after Clarrie had poured very cold water on that idea for a name.
[Susan] “Emma is all ‘Clarrie says this, Clarrie says that’”
Problem is, Susan quite liked Scarlett, and is a bit put out that she wasn’t asked about names.
So – in trying to win Clarrie’s affections, Emma’s managing to alienate her own mum.
Nice work!
About last night
Talking to Elizabeth, Kenton reckoned last night was:
[Kenton] “Was very constructive. It left me with a lot of ideas for the future”
I bet it did, matey!
I wonder how long it’s going to take for Jolene and Kenton to tell their nearest and dearest?
Hidden fruit ever more tasty?
Or are they just worried what the neighbours will say?
Tony’s unconvincing ‘bad back’ routine
I think we were all going “hmmm” along with Helen as Tony tried to make out that he had a bad back, so could really do with having an extra hand.
So Tony tries another way to persuade Helen to come home.
[Tony] “It makes sense love, on a purely business level … nice for you to have something to do … and other adults to talk to”
Tony reckons it’ll be better for everyone if Helen came home to Bridge Farm for a few weeks … a month … or two at the most …..
Sensing that Helen still wasn’t biting, Tony tries the truth:
[Tony] “Because you and Henry bring so much joys into our loves. I didn’t know I could feel like this again. That’s why we want you to come home. We’d love to be close to you and Henry. These first months are so previous … you’d make us so happy Helen. You’d be helping us”
[Helen] “If we honestly would be helping each other, then I give in. We’d love to come back for a while”
Huzzah!
Tony wins a ‘discussion’ with Helen at last.
I’m still not sure it wouldn’t be better for Helen to at least try some time to herself (with Henry), but can’t also find much reason why going back home isn’t a bad thing.
“he doesn’t know”
Alan Sanderson to tell Elizabeth that both Lily and Freddie passed their exams, so are into Cathedral School.
Which upsets Elizabeth beyond belief.
[Elizabeth, crying] “Nigel can’t be proud … can’t say well done … he doesn’t know … he’ll never know … he’ll never know anything about their lives again … oh why!”
Phew.
That was a teary moment for me as well.
- Brian, sewing boxes and green monsters
- First chance Hayley gets …
- Kenton hanging onto Jolene
- We trust in Jennifer
- Brian washing pants and making packed lunches?
- “half the pleasure is in the anticipation”
- “You betcha Jolene”
Brian, sewing boxes and green monsters
Ruairi is having a go at tying flies, which means Brian is turning Jennifer’s sewing box upside down to find some thread.
What a cheapskate! How come Kate gets a new laptop, but Ruairi doesn’t even get proper tying thread?
First chance Hayley gets …
She breaks Phoebe’s confidence.
Though technically, I suppose she only promised Phoebe she wouldn’t tell Kate. But, I hardly think telling Jennifer was entirely what Phoebe would have wanted.
Kenton hanging onto Jolene
As Kenton and Jolene make their way to their wine tasting, it sounds like Kenton’s actually taken Jolene through a building site to get there.
With uneven paving stones, Kenton cares enough to notice that Jolene could be having particular problems:
[Kenton] “it’s not ruining your heels is it?”
Bless.
And it was lovely to hear them both being awkward and shy with each other. Although they’ve known each other for an age, this is their first date.
They do seem a good match. Kenton mentions something about their evening out being work-related:
[Jolene] “Is that how you see spending time with me … hard work?”
[Kenton] “I don’t know yet …”
Ah, you tease!
And Kenton behaves like a real gentleman, holding onto Jolene as they pick their way through (what sounds like) some of the most dangerous paving in England.
We trust in Jennifer
After Hayley tells Jennifer that Phoebe is scared of flying by herself, Jennifer has a subtle chat with Phoebe.
Well, suitable enough for a child.
Jennifer tells Phoebe that she found going to Felpersham by herself as “terribly daunting”, and how Phoebe is being “ever so brave” in even thinking about travelling back from South Africa by herself.
[Jennifer] “I know I’d have been ever so worried”
(which gives Phoebe the right encouragement to open up)
[Phoebe] “That’s what’s bugging me granny … what if I don’t get on with the airline woman … I had to sit next to Mrs Riley in the school coach once … I didn’t know what to say, it was so embarrassing. She was eating tuna sandwiches the whole trip, they stand”
[Jennifer] “Oh, how frightful!”
[Phoebe] “What if they get split up, or I lose my ticket or someone snatches my bag …”
[Jennifer] “Those are very sensible concerns”
However, although Jennifer does a sterling job of getting Phoebe to talk about her fears, she takes a slightly extreme approach to allaying them …
Brian washing pants and making packed lunches?
So, Jennifer announces to Brian that she’s gone and booked herself “both ways” to South Africa – flying out with Kate and Phoebe, then flying back with Phoebe.
So that solves Phoebe.
But, that creates a whole new headache for Brian.
[Brian] “But, you can’t …”
[Jennifer] “But actually I can, the transaction has gone through”
Cheeky Brian then tries to make out that Jennifer going on Phoebe’s holiday will spoil Kate’s plans – how very unsporting of him to try and make Jennifer feel unwanted so that he doesn’t have to ‘cope’ home alone with Ruairi.
But, the only problem Jennifer can see is what to wear. She’s too excited about seeing her other grandkids to worry about Brian being caveman grumpy.
[Jennifer] “This will be the perfect opportunity for some real father son bonding”
Realising he has no choice, Brian decides to grin and pretend it’s a wonderful idea.
According to him, it will all just be a matter of “time management”.
Makes one wonder if Brian has actually noticed the kids he’s had in his household …
“half the pleasure is in the anticipation”
There seemed to be a lot of heaving breathing during Kenton and Jolene’s first date.
[Kenton] “dribbled unpronounceable cava all over my shirt”
Which I reckon was him being rather saucy, especially as they then went onto to talk about how to taste a wine – involving taking a good look – savouring the bouquet – then waiting …”half the pleasure is in the anticipation”
Oo-er! Shower scene ahoy!
[Kenton] “For some reason, life seems to be getting more interesting”
Lovely. Kenton deserves something nice to happen to him (after Kathy … and, of course, Nigel). And anything that brings Jolene back to herself is very welcome indeed.
Jolene nearly spoils the mood by bringing up Saint Sid.
[Jolene] “not trying to forget Sid … if were still here, I would be with him … and will always keep a big place in my heart for him”
But Kenton brings Jolene back to reality by asking for them to “have some fun together in the here and now”
Hmmm.
I’m not entirely convinced Kenton should be getting involved with yet another of Sid’s women, so fingers crossed there are no tears after bedtime.
“You betcha Jolene”
I really enjoyed eavesdropping on Jolene and Kenton’s first kiss – and not for any seedy reason.
It was just really nice to hear two adults, who are both generally rather nice folks in their own right, enjoy each other’s company – take such delight out of very tame flirting – and feel comfortable enough to be open with each other.
Having a little giggle that some bloke called Ray asked them if they were an item:
[Kenton] “I certainly know what I’d like us to be …”
[Jolene] “Do you?”
[Kenton] “Oh yeah …”
(some slightly slurpy, but not quite letchy, kissing)
[Kenton] “Oh wow …”
[Jolene, in a very deep, racy voice] “Yeah …”
But what I really liked was Jolene telling Kenton to call her early tomorrow.
[Jolene] “I don’t want to wake up wondering. I want to be sure this is happening.”
[Kenton] “Oh yes. You betcha Jolene”
How many times, as youngsters, have we sat by the phone waiting for ‘that’ call the day after the night before?
Good on you Jolene. No point sitting around, checking that the dial tone still works (then wondering if, when you picked up the phone to check the dial tone, they tried to call at that exact moment …).
- Has David lost the ability to say ‘no’?
- Hot chocolate instead of hot milk
- Lucky Alistair doesn’t take anything personally
- New plan to get Helen home
- David and the ‘P’ word
Has David lost the ability to say ‘no’?
It would seem so – well, to everyone apart from Ruth.
He’s a busy man back at Brookfield, but is easily persuaded by Alastair to put himself out yet again to help Alastair’s diary.
Which involves going over to Lower Loxley. Which involves leaving Brookfield to do so.
Then, David finds he can’t say no to Elizabeth when she leaves him in charge of Lower Loxley while she rushes off to collect Freddie (who had run out of his exam).
Which leaves him trapped at Lower Loxley, while there’s plenty to be getting on with at home.
Daft man.
Hot chocolate instead of hot milk
That’s Phoebe’s problem.
It’s that Hayley feeds her hot chocolate when she has nightmares. That should just be hot milk. Surely better for aiding sleep …
Anyway – Phoebe’s dream ran to something as follows:
On the school bus – but everyone grown up – stood up at her stop – but the aisle kept getting longer and longer – suddenly lots of door – everyone started getting off, knew where to go but she didn’t – forgot school bag, everyone was pushing me – tripped up …
…then woke up.
Hayley then proved that she would make a rubbish lawyer. She was utterly leading her witness:
[Hayley] “Sounds rather like an aeroplane to me.”
[Phoebe] “Well, maybe a sort of bus plane”
[Hayley, mentioning Phoebe had been talking about her holiday before she went to bed] “Maybe part of your brain carried on thinking about it after you were asleep”
It would sound like it, but I reckon Hayley would interpret any of Phoebe’s dreams to be about her holiday – but only if they somehow suggest Phoebe shouldn’t be going.
Phoebe agrees she is a bit stressed about having to get the plane back from South Africa by herself, but is adamant that Hayley can’t tell Kate about it.
[Phoebe] “Don’t say anything. She’ll think I’m a big baby … she told me, last week. She thinks I’m really grown up coming back all by myself.”
That bloomin’ Kate has a lot to answer for.
And I somehow can’t see Hayley keeping this to herself. Even though she’s now made a promise to Phoebe (that child really won’t have any trust in adults if this sort of thing keeps happening).
Lucky Alistair doesn’t take anything personally
He’s such an amendable chap, is our Alistair.
While he may have got David to do his bidding, he seems to now float through life accepting any potential slur on himself as nothing more than other folks just being that … other folks.
Daniel (where is he? By the way???) has chosen English, History, Geography and Spanish for his A Levels – but no science.
So not following in Alistair’s footsteps. But Alistair doesn’t seem to mind.
And although Alistair makes mention of Kenton suddenly uninviting him to the wine tasting, he doesn’t seem too perturbed.
What an oasis of calm he is!
Wonder if any horse tranquilisers are missing …
New plan to get Helen home
Is to convince her that Tony and Pat really need her – rather than have her thinking they think she needs them.
Helen has always been a family-lass, so maybe that will work.
But I do also think Pat and Tony should leave her be. This is way she wanted it. And she actually seems to be thriving!
David and the ‘P’ word
Honestly – I don’t know how many times I’ll have to say that David never learns.
He’s using the bloomin’ P work again to Ruth, as she’s having a go at him for spending too much time at Lower Loxley.
[Ruth] “I know it’s a desperate situation, but you can’t keep papering over the cracks … she’s going to have to learn to do without you sometime. You’re damaging our business.”
[David] “She’s so fragile, it’s like she’s about to break”
[Ruth] “I am very sorry and concerned for her … but we’ve got to face facts … you’ve got to grasp the nettle for her sake”
It’s a tough one.
Ruth’s right – David can’t go on working at both Lower Loxley and Brookfield without collapsing from exhaustion and dropping a big clanger at one (or both). And Ruth can’t go on working Brookfield without David. But Elizabeth does need help.
Of course, as everyone keeps saying, Elizabeth needs to accept that she needs to bring an expert manager into help her.
David yet again agrees. Yet again says he’ll speak to Elizabeth. And yet again says to Ruth:
“I promise”
Humpf! Ruth should just go over the both of their heads and book a manager. At least someone would then be doing something useful!
- Blood and feathers on the churchyard wall
- George wants a red racing car, not a baby
- Music clubs and currywurst
- It’s not lack of sleep that’s making Helen yawn
- Is Emma just thick?
- Helen’s back to DVDs and being stubborn
- Hurrah! Happiness in Ambridge!!!!
Blood and feathers on the churchyard wall
That really should be a The Smiths song title.
It would seem the Peregrines are back – which Lynda is delighted about, but Emma doesn’t like. The sight of “lumps of dead bird” doesn’t take her fancy at all.
George wants a red racing car, not a baby
Quite right mate.
Music clubs and currywurst
Was the sum total of Tom and Brenda’s trip to Berlin.
That sounds a bit of alright.
Please don’t tell me I’m getting as dull as those two …
It’s not lack of sleep that’s making Helen yawn
And it’s not The Bull chucking out time (though that both the pub and the village shop are keeping Helen awake adds up to Helen moving home soon, I reckon).
It’s Helen boring herself.
As all new mums do, she’s entranced by the sight of her baby sneezing. And thinks it makes for good general chat.
Mais non!
Lucky it was just the proud grandmum Pat she was talking to. Not sure if Kirsty would be coping with another round of mumstalk
But beware Helen … even Thatcher didn’t manage to function on less than 5 hours …
Is Emma just thick?
She certainly isn’t taking the hint from Clarrie that she’s unlikely to ever beat Nic in the favourite daughter-in-law stakes (unless she starts to genuinely care – rather than try to force herself to care).
Though I agree with Clarrie that Emma’s choice of names isn’t that great – it’s that she doesn’t know about the connotations of ‘Scarlett woman’ which also leads me to think she’s a tad thick.
Emma wants Sky or Charlie for a boy (she only mentioned Charlie after Clarrie said she liked Charles), and Scarlett for a girl.
After Scarlett Johansson – rather than Scarlett O’Hara (which Emma reckoned she’d just ‘forgotten’ about).
On Clarrie saying she thought it’d be a bad name because of the jokes the child would suffer in later life, Emma just didn’t get it.
[Emma] “What?”
[Clarrie] “Well it’s in the bible Emma – a Scarlett woman, well she’s no better than she ought to be”
Hmmm. One would have thought Emma would see herself in that description …
Anyway, Emma offers to help Clarrie with Eddie’s birthday picnic, but Nic has beaten her to it.
Emma will be fighting to get to cut Joe’s toenails next …
Helen’s back to DVDs and being stubborn
Helen reckons she’s going to properly slop out in front of a DVD (very Helen-like), and is refusing to move back home, even part-time, to make her life easier (very, very Helen-like).
But, she did also came out with:
[Helen] “You can’t expect the whole world to be quiet just because you have a baby”
Now that is very un-Helen like indeed. The world used to revolve round Helen. Now it’s Henry – Helen seems to have (sometimes) gained some perspective.
Hurrah! Happiness in Ambridge!!!!
Kenton goes round to Jolene to talk to her about The Bull.
I’ll leave (most of) the rest up to them:
[Kenton] “ …even if he’s going to rip anything out … turn it into flats?”
[Jolene] “I don’t know. I don’t care what Matt will do with it … what’s it matter to you?”
[Kenton] “ … Ambridge without The Bull, it’s unthinkable.”
[Jolene - sarcastically] “Fantastic. One less place to have a beer. That’s what’s bugging you … losing one of your locals”
[Kenton] “No it isn’t. I couldn’t give a damn about the pub. It’s … it’s you. I don’t want to see you go”
[Jolene - quietly] “You don’t want ,me to leave Ambridge?”
[Kenton] “No”
[Jolene] “Why not?”
[Kenton - softly] “Why do you think …?”
[Jolene] “I don’t know … I didn’t think it would make any difference to you”
(Kenton then tries to walk away from it, telling Jolene to forget it)
[Jolene] “I don’t get it, why did you pull the plug on me last week?”
[Kenton] “I didn’t want to. I had to … we were (getting on) much too well … the way that I feel about you. It isn’t … um, appropriate .. you’ve been depressed, you’re vulnerable, It’s totally wrong of me to care for you too much …”
[Jolene] “Don’t you think I should be judge of that?”
[Kenton, stunned] “What?”
[Jolene] “Hearts don’t work to a timetable, do they? I couldn’t work out why I was so mad with you last week … it really hurt. So I asked myself why. I realised … I have feelings an all”
[Kenton – even more stunned] “No!”
[Jolene] “Yes. You do mean it?”
(which is worth checking – it is Kenton …)
[Kenton] “Yes … I didn’t know what it was until I was talking to Kirsty …”
[Jolene] “Oh – the two of us! Ain't you meant to get wiser as you get older!”
Ah – that was a real grinning, breath of freshly buzzing air.
Marvellous!
Kenton and Jolene have agreed to take things slow – but could you also already hear the rather husky, racy tones of Jolene returning?
They were giggling like teenagers at the end. And Kenton asked Jolene out this Thursday – to which Jolene replied:
[Jolene] “oh yea, I’d really like that Kenton”
(and I somehow think they won’t be taking things too slow, or ‘just as friends’ for very long at all …)
- Lily is quite evil
- “I’ve got an awkward little decision to make”
- Now Topper’s for it
- “Tell your mum”
- “You just got on with it”
Lily is quite evil
Lily has the makings of a really nasty piece of work.
It’s bad enough that she told Freddie he’s mucked his exam up – but did she really then have to go through all of the questions assuming she was right and he was wrong?
Bless little Freddie (who was overjoyed when he thought he might have actually got one right). He deserves far better in a sister.
“I’ve got an awkward little decision to make”
That’s one of the biggest understatements I’ve ever heard!
Lilian’s propping up the bar of Jaxx.
Kenton quite believe that she’s only drinking coffee:
[Kenton] “It’s unusual seeing you with a drink that can’t bite back”
But she’s pondering away, on her “little decision” about whether she should sell The Bull. This goes on for hours, with no sign of booze, until Kenton can’t take it anymore.
[Kenton] “Lilian, I don't want you in any way to take this personally … if you carry on sitting there, I may have to put a lampshade over your head or else passers-by will assume we’re holding a festival of gloom”
So – Lilian has a G&T (hurrah!) and starts to tell Kenton her woes:
[Lilian] “What’s been so maddening, is that he’s been right all along”
(Swearing Kenton to secrecy before she’ll tell him anything, Kenton respond with)
[Kenton] “The secret of the Marie Celeste … the real reason the Mona Lisa is smiling… Lord Lucan’s current postcode. I know them all. But I haven't breathed a word”
When Lilian tells him, Kenton can’t believe it.
He can’t believe Jolene would sell – especially not when it’d mean The Bull wouldn’t be actually sold and kept as a pub.
So he decides to go and see Jolene, but she’s away. (can I just say – what an arse that man can be. He’s been blanking Jolene for a while now, but suddenly decides he can see her when there’s a pub at stake. Nice mate, that one).
But Lilian reckons Jolene’s seeming willingness to see The Bull bulldozed (gettit!) goes deep.
[Lilian] “I got the impression she simply can’t wait to leave Ambridge”
Now Topper’s for it
Topper was Nigel’s hunter – which no-one will now ride.
Which seemingly isn’t good for a horse (though some would think an easy life of grazing and grooming would be quite a nice prospect).
So – he’s to be sold.
And as per, David wants to arrange it, even though Shula could more than likely do a far better job.
Will that man ever stop punishing himself? He’ll be causing yet more disaster if he continues like this.
“Tell your mum”
Jill isn’t daft when it comes to reading her kids.
She spots David’s not quite up to par. And manages to get him to talk about him and Ruth.
[David] “We seem to have lost the knack of talking to each other sensibly at the moment”
[Jill] “You shouldn’t be running backwards and forwards all the time … come less often, but do spend more time when you are here”
The thing is – everyone around Elizabeth agrees that the only real answer to everyone’s woes is to get a professional manager in for Lower Loxley.
But no. They’re all still tip-toeing around her as she:
[Jill] “Still can’t bear the thought of someone taking Nigel’s place”
I know that it will take a very long time for Elizabeth to heal (if ever), but how long will David have to go on half-killing himself working at both Lower Loxley and Brookfield … or how long before Ruth kills him?
And I think Jill actually made things worse. She made mention of what would happen if David didn’t help out as much – Elizabeth would try and do everything herself, which would put strain on her already dodgy heart and could result in death.
Nice work Jill.
As if David needed any more guilt to cope with.
“You just got on with it”
And there it is – Elizabeth spelt out why she is insisting on making life so difficult for everyone in not hiring a professional manager:
[Elizabeth] “I want you to know it really doesn’t matter if you pass or fail … yet you just got on with it”
Talking to Freddie and Lily to reassure them if they fail their exams – Elizabeth seemed to be saying she was proud of them for ‘getting on with it’ through their grief.
Is that her measure?
Could explain a lot. And mean a lot more hassle for David long-term.
- He’s lying
- It is worth crying over contaminated milk
- What wintering ducks are left?
- Will the papers force Helen back to Bridge farm?
- Kirsty’s not the maternal type
- Emma’s not the bookish type
- Helen’s now not interested in stew packs and spices
- Ruth can apply a docking ring without falling over
He’s lying
David, David, David … when are you going to learn?
You were nice to let Ruth have a longer sleep (by starting the milking), but why did you then pretend to Ruth that all was in hand with Elizabeth?
You didn’t even have the conversation with her that you promised you would (to Ruth).
And giving Elizabeth yet another excuse for not hiring in a professional manager (Elizabeth can’t focus because of the coroner letter) isn’t going to wash with Ruth anymore.
Why make it harder on yourself? Just be honest with Ruth. She’ll work it out in the end anyway … your absence will speak volumes.
It is worth crying over contaminated milk
David’s tired, stressed and rushing – so has made yet another mistake at Brookfield.
This time, he didn’t switch the bypass on – which meant that all of the milk from this morning, and from last night, was contaminated with dirty water.
And Ruth most definitely isn’t a happy chappy.
[Ruth] “You’re over at Lower Loxley everyday no matter what I say”
[David] “What she’s going through … every time I see her, she’s in so much pain”
David sees it as a “question of timing”. Ruth sees it as a question of David doing the best thing for both his family and for Elizabeth – by letting go of his guilt, and letting Elizabeth stop being so dependent on him.
[Ruth] “So, how do we wait? Until you’ve wrecked everything here …”
Hopefully not Ruth, but goodness knows when David will take back control of his own life.
As Ruth later said to Usha:
[Ruth] “He needs to stop his heart ruling his head … we can’t cope with him being part-time here any longer ... he’s making things worse for Elizabeth – how’s she ever going to face reality again?”
What wintering ducks are left?
Kirsty mentioned that she and Patrick were off to see – but I doubt we’ll hear more about it.
*sigh*
It’s those all too important moments which some hidden microphones cannot reach …
Will the papers force Helen back to Bridge farm?
Seemingly Helen’s losing sleep over noise from downstairs, as well as due to Henry.
How the volunteers in the village shop can be so noisy over newspapers, one can only hazard a guess.
But I wonder if it’ll be Jim Lloyd et al who will encourage Helen on her way back ‘home’ …
Kirsty’s not the maternal type
Or that is at least what it sounded like when Helen left her with Henry.
Emma’s not the bookish type
Bless Usha for having open enough a mind to even think of asking Emma if she wanted to join the book club.
Seems that Richard Thwaite and Caroline have also joined. Sabrina must be still trying to get out of her cat suit, and goodness knows where Oliver’s gone to.
Their first book is The Suspicions of Mr Whicher (which I also highly recommend), but that didn’t seem to entice Emma.
[Emma] “I don’t see the point of sitting around and talking about it afterwards … too much like school, takes all the fun out if it”
Which is fair enough. Emma always struck me as more of a Hello reader …
Helen’s now not interested in stew packs and spices
She’s barely got Henry back from hospital – but now Kirsty is also trying to get her back into work mode (as well as Tony the other day).
I suppose they’re all starting to realise how much work Helen did. It’s all fine and good telling someone to take it easy, but harder to cope without them.
Kirsty has some new ideas, but Helen really couldn’t give a hoot.
She even took it as far to tell Kirsty just to crack on:
[Helen] “Plough right on and see what happens”
And nor was she interested in new salad grower.
Cripes!
All Helen wanted to look at, talk about and think about was Henry.
Ah – there’s a typical new mum for you.
[Helen] “I want to show you his bath mitt – pink sponge hippopotamus – perfect for getting behind his ears – you’ll love it!”
*yawn*
Ruth can apply a docking ring without falling over
On yersel!
- Come on Eddie – take Clarrie to Paris
- Cripes – Emma is most certainly Susan’s daughter
- “they think it wasn’t an accident?”
- Susan and Neil’s 27th anniversary
- “my mate what was on Mastermind”
- Emma’s pants askew
- “he wasn’t quite so … Anglo Saxon”
- Jolene’s made a decision
- Lilian gives it to Matt with both barrels
Come on Eddie – take Clarrie to Paris
How happy did Clarrie sound at the thought of Paris. Mind you, Eddie didn’t seem to notice.
Although it was a bit unfair of Clarrie asking Eddie to forgo his ideal 60th birthday celebration ( a day at the races) for Paris – it might have been quite lovely of Eddie to give Clarrie a proper break.
The last time Clarrie managed to get to rest her feet was when she broke herself, rather than had a break …
Still, Eddie is Eddie – and Eddie is happy with Felpersham.
Each to their own – but spare a thought for them that keep your world running right.
Cripes – Emma is most certainly Susan’s daughter
So Emma simply had to read David’s letter from the coroner because it was lying next to the ironing …. aye, right then!
What’s worse, Emma then had to blab about it. And she blabs about it to her mum. Who will then tell all and every.
Emma really does need to get on Clarrie’s better side and learn a bit about being honourable, discreet, caring …
“they think it wasn’t an accident?”
So in typical Susan-Carter-fashion, Emma then starts pondering aloud as to whether the Coroner letters mean that Nigel’s death is being treated as suspicious.
Susan did put her right (that it’s only a formality), but it was actually about time the gossip started about Nigel’s death being a bit dodgy.
Two grown men, go up on a stately home’s roof, to untie a banner, in the dark, when it was frosty.
Who’d believe that?
There’s been a murder …
(well, no there hasn’t, but it only takes one drum to start banging …)
Susan and Neil’s 27th anniversary
Poor Neil.
“my mate what was on Mastermind”
I want to go to Eddie’s birthday race day.
He sounds like he’s got a right varied bunch of mates going:
“And Lenny, my mate what was on Mastermind”
How intriguing.
What was Lenny’s specialist subject?
Emma’s pants askew
(or gets her knickers in a twist)
Emma’s nose if well out of joint because Eddie was raving about his birthday party in the village shop to Susan – but Emma know nothing about it. She just had to grin and pretend she’d been invited.
After Eddie leaves, Emma has a right good moan to Susan:
[Emma] “They just presume … it’s like I’m an afterthought … I'm just this person who delivers George”
[Susan] Seriously Emma, I haven’t time to listen to your conspiracy theories”
So Susan packs Emma off to actually talk to Clarrie, rather than just rant about it.
Eddie and Clarrie put Emma right – Eddie had made a mistake in thinking they had invited Emma and Ed.
(but surely Eddie or Clarrie should have thought they were the first who needed to be invited? That they weren’t says a lot …).
But not to be completely placated easily, Emma’s now worried about how much money her and Ed will be able to put into the pot for Eddie to gamble with (Will and Nic have more ready cash to hand – so might show them up), and was increasingly put-out that the whole birthday had been planned by Nic.
Come on Emma.
I know you’re not the brightest spark in the fire, but surely even you can join the dots between being a genuinely caring daughter-in-law/friend to your partner’s parents, and being fully accepted into the family?
“he wasn’t quite so … Anglo Saxon”
Talking her and Matt’s trip to Paris, Lilian gave us a very odd (and quite stomach churning) veiled reference to fruity liaisons with Matt:
[Lilian] “The romance even rubbed off on Matt … he wasn’t quite so … Anglo Saxon”
*shudder*
Jolene’s made a decision
Having a chat with Lilian, Jolene comes out with:
[Jolene] “I would be willing to consider selling you my share of the Bull”
As I’ve said before – I’m fairly nonplussed about Jolene selling. The woman just hasn’t got the hunger to make selling pint of Shires and crisps a proper goer anymore (despite our We Love The Bull campaign).
But – it would be a bit odd to no longer be able to eavesdrop in on the boozy Ambridge moments.
So I’m fine with Jolene selling – but a bit perturbed if that means we no longer have a village pub.
Anyway – Jolene explains to (a rather shocked-but-trying-to-hide-it) Lilian that she made her mind up after realising that The Bull means just as much to Lilian that it does to her – so that it must be okay if Lilian is ready to let it go.
[Jolene] “But at the end of the day, it’s a business. And it’s no good to either of us if it doesn’t make money”
Lilian does manage to gulp back her shock – but it’s all news to her. Jolene’s been persuaded by Matt, without Lilian knowing a thing about it.
Which takes me neatly to:
Lilian gives it to Matt with both barrels
After her chat with Jolene, Lilian is utterly boiling with fury.
Matt went to Jolene, after she had told him not to, behind her back, with a proposal that she had not agreed to.
[Lilian] “I told you not to take it any further. You know how I feel. I have got no intention of closing The Bull.”
Furthermore, Lilian feels that Matt’s simply taking advantage of a woman who is still in deep grief over the death of her husband, so is “playing with her emotions”
[Lilian] “That’s still not an invitation for you to start dripping poison in her ear”
Matt’s response is typical. Although he went behind Lilian’s back – it’s done now – it looks like he’s got a result – so they should just crack on.
But Lilian seems adamant that she’s not going to let him away with this.
[Lilian] “I am not going to be the person held responsible for closing down the village pub”
Lilian then tried to say that she also didn’t want to turn The Bull into flats because of memories of her dad (which didn’t quite ring true – surely Lilian hasn’t forgotten that Jack was an alcoholic? Not the best state of mind for a publican …).
[Lilian] “not everything is a business opportunity , Matt … Just because you haven’t got a past that you care about”
(ouch!)
[Matt] “No, I’m far too busy worrying about the future”
[Lilian] “Don’t patronise me”
[Matt] “Then don’t be so sentimental”
[Lilian – storming off for a drink] “If you can’t work as a team, see how you get on without me”
Hmmm. Where have we heard that before.
As much as I utterly adore Lilian, there’s always a feeling that Matt will ultimately get what Matt wants.
- Tony wants Helen back home
- David’s already breaking his promise
- The Reichstag … wonderful???
- General is now in a good place
- Wasnae me – it was the coroner!
Tony wants Helen back home
Still in quite an unnervingly Buddha-calm like temper – Helen seems to be coping quite well on her own with Henry.
Helen even joked with Tony about him taking Henry to The Bull the other night:
[Helen] “ … even when Eddie was showing him how to play darts”
[Tony] “That was only for a moment”
However – Helen doesn’t seem to have had an utter personality transplant overnight.
Pat later sounded very exasperated that Helen won’t even let her change henry’s nappy (being over controlling again, trying to prove a point or just a new mum wanting to do everything for her bairn?).
While Tony’s seems to have accepted that Helen has had her baby solo – he sounds to not be entirely convinced that Henry should actually be brought up just with Helen.
[Tony] “Better for Henry to have lots of people … and we are his only grandparents. That makes us doubly important.”
[Pat] “Tony, I agree”
[Tony] “Oh! Right!!!”
(the shock in Tony’s voice that Pat agreed with him was palpable).
However, both agree that it won’t be an easy task to persuade Helen that she should move back to Bridge Farm.
Good luck with that one, folks!
David’s already breaking his promise
Taking time to properly (and genuinely) thank Ruth for everything she’s having to do alone while he is at Lower Loxley, David makes his first slip in telling Ruth that Elizabeth is also aware of the fact that Ruth is having to work her wee socks off.
While is either a lie (Elizabeth has no awareness of anything beyond the doors of Lower Loxley), or is David lying to himself.
Ruth has another go at David about him finally (and firmly) telling Elizabeth to hire a professional manager, which David agrees to do.
However …
Wasnae me – it was the coroner!
… as David tentatively tries to start telling Elizabeth that he and Ruth can no longer cope with the extra workload – and that she must get a professional manager – Elizabeth interrupts David to tell him that she got a letter from the coroner.
The coroner wants to know what dates Elizabeth is free – and has also probably written to David.
[Elizabeth] “it came as a shock – seeing Nigel’s name in cold, hard print”
Oh dear.
So Elizabeth is very upset again, and David can’t tell her that he needs to step back from being of direct support.
What a dilemma.
Keep your wife happy (or at least avoid her dying from exhaustion), and let your very recently bereaved sister down – or chance divorce out of guilt and familial love.
Hmmm. Don’t think that’s once that can be answered anytime soon.
The Reichstag … wonderful???
Tony gets a text from Tom – who has just arrived in Berlin for his joint 30th birthday treat with Brenda.
[Tony] “(They’re) apparently in a taxi driving past the Reichstag”
[Pat] “Really? That’s wonderful!”
It might just have been me, but Pat’s enthusiasm for the Reichstag felt a bit odd.
Something we don’t know about???
General is now in a good place
Reported David to Elizabeth.
I am glad.
Any bull that lets a child ride his back deserves all nice things to happen.
- VisitScotland need to sort this one out
- “I can’t be with you all the time”
- Usha’s book club slowly attracts the likelys
- Temper temper, Ruth
- Brian’s got the measure of Matt and Lilian
- Spare a thought for Jill
- Bunty hasn’t changed
- David needs to stop promising
VisitScotland need to sort this one out
So it’s taken David a few months to drive a bull up to Scotland – and many months more to get back.
Come on chaps – it isn’t quite the Siberian outpost it used to be.
Not exactly a great advertisement for holidaying in Scotland (if it is such a trauma getting to and from it), but then again, you can’t blame Ambridge folks for speaking their mind.
(and I also declare my interest - I’m working on a tourism project in Scotland at the moment. So I guess it’s as much my problem to sort as it is VisitScotland!).
“I can’t be with you all the time”
Oh Kate – do shut up, will you.
Poor Phoebe is showing her age (that she’s still a child), but Kate doesn’t seem to notice and/or actually give a toss!
Jennifer was worried about Brian on route back from Paris – which got Phoebe worried about her own trip – then, when Brian came back with tales of lost boarding passes and dodgy engines, Phoebe was starting to sound terrified.
Phoebe asked Kate to change her plans to fly back with her, but Kate’s refusing in order to spend time with her kids in South Africa.
Which is fine. But she takes no time to hear what Phoebe is really saying (that she’s scared), instead assumes that Phoebe is some sort of carbon copy of herself as a youngster.
[Kate] “Just think how grown up you’d feel. What an adventure!”
No Kate. No.
Phoebe doesn’t want an adventure.
She wants a mum who spares two thoughts for her own feelings.
Usha’s book club slowly attracts the likelys
She’s not quite going at a Richard & Judy’s Book Club pace, but Usha does seem to be getting some interest.
Ruth is being ever so gently frogmarched into it, but Jim’s also joining – and Jennifer sounds very keen indeed.
I wonder if this will inspire Jennifer to return to her authoress days?
Temper temper, Ruth
Stressed out yet again due to an absence of David, Ruth has a go at Pip for wanting to go to a party.
Now you know that’s not fair, Ruth.
Pip’s been a gem at helping out, but she is still a teenager who wants to do teenage things. Like “go off and get drunk with your friends”.
Not that Pip wants to get drunk. She’s just happy to have passed her test, so has no problem with being the designated driver.
Brian’s got the measure of Matt and Lilian
Back from his trip to Paris with Matt and Lilian in tow:
[Jennifer] “What about Matt and Lilian? Was it everything you feared?”
[Brian] “They weren’t that bad … I got a little tired of being treated as their PA … having so much time to watch them operate … I thought it was only a matter of time before one of them throttled the other, but actually seeing the two of them work together, they make a formidable pair.”
Will this herald a whole new attitude towards Lilian? Will she finally be accepted as something more than just Matt’s puppet.
Actually – does she really deserve more? Lilian may not be as daft as she often seems, but she’s hardly any real use in doing her own bidding …
Spare a thought for Jill
Jill’s either at Lower Loxley or Brookfield – helping out, cooking food, and soothing nerves/tempers.
Difference is that there’s no-one there to get angry on her behalf.
Aw.
Bunty hasn’t changed
According to Jill.
And Bunty reckons Daniel’s growing up to look like Mark.
Well at least we know something about Daniel. He’s been very, very quiet as of late.
David needs to stop promising
We all know now that the moment David promises Ruth that he’ll be around at Brookfield more, something else will mean he’ll break that promise.
Goodness sake man. I know you’re in a difficult position, but will you ever learn?
- What Parade?
- Jolene went funny at the mention of Kenton
- Peter the financial adviser has a cold
- Cropping plans, Romanesco and Chard
- The lady was for turning
- What’s wrong with Tony, eh Eddie?
- “Here we still are”
What Parade?
Helen mentioned she was going to ‘The Parade’ with Henry.
What parade? Surely parades are such a commonplace event in Borchester that they become so commonplace?
I’ll wonder about that for weeks now. Was it Disney cartoons? A local festival? A Riding? Charity floats? Gay Pride?
We must be told.
Jolene went funny at the mention of Kenton
It’s a wee shame on her. Kenton really needs to explain himself. Jolene needs her mates right now.
Peter the financial adviser has a cold
Poor Peter (though we know not a lot about him – so I suppose sympathy can only go so far).
Jolene’s in seeing Peter about potentially selling The Bull.
[Peter] “That’s a shame … not a complete surprise after all you’ve been through over the last year”
Seemingly Sid and Jolene got The Bull valued a few years ago – when it was worth half a million. But Peter now guesses it’ll only be £450,000.
Which, after putting Jamie’s legacy aside – buying a new house – sorting the legals etc wouldn’t leave much change.
[Jolene] “It’s not exactly much for almost 40 years of Sid’s life”
Now there’s a thought.
Will the recession actually save The Bull? Will Jolene realise that it’s better to sit tight and wait for better times?
Mind you – that could be a very long wait indeed.
Cropping plans, Romanesco and Chard
Despite harassing Helen to stay away from Ambridge Organics, Tony then pops over later on to talk about cropping plans.
Come on Tony – either Helen’s working, or she isn’t.
(mind you – Romanesco is a grand idea. I had it a coupe, of times in a veg box I used to get. After having to look it up online first to work out what it was and what to do with it – I can highly recommend it steamed, then served with a squeeze of lemon and a bit of grated parmesan. Brilliant).
The lady was for turning
I no longer recognise Helen
Which is a tad unsettling as I always enjoyed a prolonged Helen whine.
I thought that she would surely return to form over Tony taking Henry to the pub (while she caught up on her sleep), but no. She was fine with it. All she said was:
[Helen] “Mind? No. I’m pleased you had a nice time. Just ask me first next time, eh”
Blimey!
Even Tony seems to have picked up Helen’s glow. Which paints an interesting image indeed.
What’s wrong with Tony, eh Eddie?
Chatting to Mike about his forthcoming birthday do at the racing, Eddie seemed quite perturbed that Tony would think that he was also invited.
What’s so wrong with Tony?
I’m not saying I’d want to spend a few hours in his company, but the poor chap doesn’t have much else outside of the farm, wife, kids and now grandkid.
“Here we still are”
[Eddie] “Here we still are … sat round a table in the bull … just like when we were young whippersnappers”
Now where you could see Eddie, Mike and Tony as sad old craters for having stuck to the same pub/village/life for all these years – but I reckon there’s something warmly satisfying about it.
- Not really
- We want Debbie!
- Josh nearly hit one of the lambs with a football
- Matt’s not letting Brian look at seed drills
- Roy tries to make Elizabeth go away
- Matt calls Lilian Pusscat
- Matt says it, Lilian agrees it and Brian does it
- Josh is the man of the farm
- “All the way to Scotland”
- “It would have finished any other man”
- “I hope you’re glad you stuck with me”
Not really
That we a bit of a slow Ambridge night – which is surprising, considering Matt, Lilian and Brian are in Paris.
Still, I suppose one really shouldn’t expect that much from an agricultural exhibition.
However – I shall keep this briefer than brief (as there isn’t actually much to say).
So here's Ten Topics from tonight, in 10 words or less.
We want Debbie!
Debbie in Paris, but no secret microphones nearby. Booo!
Josh nearly hit one of the lambs with a football
But didn’t.
Matt’s not letting Brian look at seed drills
Just because he’s playing some sort of power game.
Roy tries to make Elizabeth go away
And succeeds. Roy should be new Lower Loxley manager?
Matt calls Lilian Pusscat
During a business discussion, which I find highly unprofessional
Matt says it, Lilian agrees it and Brian does it
Matt and Lilian eat and shop, Brian haggles the salesman.
Josh is the man of the farm
Says David. Josh birthed one lamb.
“All the way to Scotland”
Where General Custard is heading. But Scotland isn’t far. Honestly.
“It would have finished any other man”
Lilian to Matt on turning his luck around.
[Matt] “I hope you’re glad you stuck with me”
[Lilian] “Always …”
Lilian to retract sentiments over The Bull?
- Susan’s front page news
- Lynda’s still going on, and on, and on …
- Ian Craig to do THE wedding?
- Brian’s off to Paris
- Kenton’s being a twerp
- Eddie’s a Bonnie Tyler fan
- Ruined packet of crisps
- Poor Jolene
Susan’s front page news
Susan is on the front page of The Echo – as she was near Camilla when the picture was taken.
Seemingly Clarrie isn’t happy about it. She can’t be seen.
To be exact, she can’t be seen because Susan is waving her Union Jack flag over Clarrie’s face.
Ah Clarrie. Will your light ever be let out from that bushel?
Lynda’s still going on, and on, and on …
Now Lynda reckons that Camilla gave a hoot that her bicycle chain had come off, while she was alone, in the dark, on a country lane. She’s seemingly not saying:
[Jennifer] “How affected by her plight (Camilla) was”
[Jolene] “I’m not so sure about that Jennifer. She just gave her a wave”
Quite right Jolene.
In fact, Camilla saw that Lynda was in distress, and just drove on.
Hardly the beginnings of a deep and meaningful relationship.
Ian Craig to do THE wedding?
(and I will admit that I had to go and do a bit of research to get the notion out of my mind that they were talking about Andrew and Fergie … my how time has marched on without me noticing)
Probably not. I’d have thought they’d chose their chef based on more than just some decent shortbread.
However, I wouldn’t put it by Camilla to soon launch a new range of Duchy …
Brian’s off to Paris
With Matt and Lilian.
That wasn’t Brian’s plan. It did sound like he was up to something, after all the effort he want to in persuading Jennifer that it’d be pointless her tagging alone.
My money was on him asking Ruth to accompany him but, let’s face it, I don’t think Brian would actually have been that fussy.
Anyhoo – he’s got no chance to dally with Lilian and Matt also on the trip. In fact, he can’t even relax in his room without Lilian stalking him (though to be fair, he did say he’d be down to dinner).
[Brian] “How to matt and Lilian manage to stick their beaks into everything?”
Just to keep annoying you, Brian …
Kenton’s being a twerp
After his chat with Kirsty yesterday, Kenton seems to have decided that the best way for him to deal with Jolene is to avoid and ignore.
He refuses a coffee.
Then cancels their night out at a gig, by telephone, during which he hung up very abruptly, before Jolene could say goodbye.
That’s simply spot on Kenton. Good job indeed. You have feelings for Jolene, you think that’s wrong, so – of course – the best thing to do is to be an arse to Jolene, and make her feel like crap.
That’s just what she needs – and is certainly what Matt wants …
Nice one Kenton. You’re a true friend indeed (!)
Eddie’s a Bonnie Tyler fan
Who’d have thunk it?
Nic’s decided that she and Will need to sort something out for Eddie’s impending 60th birthday, rather than assuming Clarrie will sort it.
[Nic] “Why does it always have to be up to her. Why can’t we do something … be nice if we could do the organising for a change”
Will agrees with Nic, and later comes up with the idea that Eddie would love a night at the races.
They even reckon that they could give Eddie money to gamble with, rather than giving him presents. Which Will is glad about, as he was running out of ideas:
[Will] “I can’t get him another Bonnie Tyler CD”
I’m off to ponder this new information that Eddie is a Bonnie Tyler fan …
Ruined packet of crisps
That Jake and Mia can’t be trusted with a prawn cocktail packet of crisps.
They ended up ruining them by spilling them all over the floor as they fought over them.
But all’s well. There was another box of them our back.
Phew!
Poor Jolene
She’s not a daft one, is our Jolene.
Kenton suddenly blowing cold is all too obvious to Jolene – and she’s annoyed with herself for being so upset that Kenton’s cancelled their night out at the gig.
Trying to tell herself that it doesn’t matter, Nic catches her muttering away to herself.
[Nic] “I won't tell anyone, except myself”
(nice touch Nic).
So maybe Jolene also liked Kenton – maybe she didn’t, and is just gutted that a friend can treat her so badly.
Either way – Kenton, you are a twerp!
- Jazzer’s making some sense
- Tom’s efforts go unnoticed
- The Crown and Cushion at Penny Hasset comes Kenton recommended
- Poor Roy
- Kenton doth protest?
Jazzer’s making some sense
[Jazzer] “Have you learned nothing from me laddie? You never give your number to a lassie you’re no interested in … you give them one digit wrong, or you give them Mike’s number or Tom’s number or the number to the Chinese takeaway”
[Harry] “Some of us have a conscience, Jazzer”
I’m with Jazzer on this one. Harry should just face up to the lady (well, ladies) in question, and be honest.
Though I can see why he’s worried.
Harry’s had 20 texts from Tasha – and has been replying so not to seem to be rude – and now her mate Zoe’s getting in on the act. Zoe reckons that if he doesn’t want Tasha, she’d be happy to get it on with Flash Harry.
While Harry reckons it’s all Jazzer’s fault – this is actually one time it was utterly not of Jazzer’s doing.
Harry agreed to go on the date. Harry flirted with both ladies. Harry isn’t being straight with them by text.
Ignoring Jazzer’s suggestion that he tell them he’s too busy “worming the cat”, Harry doesn’t seem to have any decent ideas about how to cope with his multiple-but-unwanted-female-interest.
So Jazzer takes control of Harry’s mobile, and texts “Not interested. Have a nice life.” to them both.
Job done. Methinks.
I’m just glad Harry doesn’t have a rabbit.
Tom’s efforts go unnoticed
Pat and Tony are back from their rather wonderful holiday – but Kirsty reckons:
[Kirsty] “Tom was quite hurt. He was ever so proud to spot mastitis …”
But of course – one cannot compete with a recently born grandchild.
Wonder how long it’ll take Tom to try and inseminate Brenda, if that’s the only way to get a bit of glory.
The Crown and Cushion at Penny Hasset comes Kenton recommended
Good-o. I’m always on the look for a good pub with decent scran.
Poor Roy
First off, he has to suffer:
[Roy] “Another dose of Lynda going on about her special relationship with Royalty”
(by-the-by – Ian is being quite modest about his proper brush with Camilla)
Now he has to “face the dreaded Mrs Blisset” in order to beg for Phoebe’s time off of school to go to South Africa.
He’ll be getting it tight from Hayley for even having to broker the compromise.
And he’s having to do Elizabeth’s work for her (even though Grey Gables is her client).
Ach well.
Could be worse.
He could be related to Vicky.
Oh, hang on …
Kenton doth protest?
Spotting that Kenton has yet again been out with Jolene, Kirsty reckons there’s more to their friendship that Kenton will admit:
[Kirsty] “It’s not occasionally though. It’s a heck of a lot … come on … just good friends, we all know what that means.”
[Kenton] “You may live your life by the headlines in the celebrity magazines … in the real world, just good friends means just that”
Which would be fine, and understandable, if Kenton hadn’t gone on to say:
[Kenton] “The idea that I’m hitting on her when Sid hasn’t been dead even a year … it’d be totally wrong. Totally inappropriate. I’m totally shocked that you’d even say that. Totally inappropriate.”
Aha! There it is then. Kenton wants to. But knows it’s a tad dodgy.
Problem is, I’m not sure how much ,more I can stomach of Kenton and Jolene not being Kenton and Jolene.
Time to make or stop?
- Cars rather than brothers
- What colour Usha. WHAT COLOUR????
- Usha’s book club
- He who shall not be named
- Elizabeth has some self-awareness
- The 18th that wasn’t really much ado
Cars rather than brothers
Well chuffed with her new car (especially with its new car smell), Pip offers to take Josh and Ben to school.
And promises to be careful:
[Pip] “I will be … especially as it’s my car”
That’s right Pip. Priorities perfectly aligned.
Still wondering what type of car it is though …
What colour Usha. WHAT COLOUR????
There’s too much teasing going on from Ambridge residents these days.
They won’t tell us what car Pip has got.
And Usha seemingly has inside knowledge about what the ‘in’ colour is this season, but didn’t say what it is.
We can’t see you, by the way folks.
Usha’s book club
Will this be the new savour for book sales, taking the mantle from Richard & Judy?
[Usha] “It’s just want the cultural landscape in Ambridge needs”
Ahem.
Maybe not,
He who shall not be named
But Pip did.
Spotting that Elizabeth wasn’t exactly the life and soul, Pip thanked Elizabeth for her support during the whole … *spit* … Jude … *spit* … saga. …
I just had a horrible thought.
You don’t think He will return one day?
Elizabeth has some self-awareness
At last – Elizabeth mentions that she is making things difficult at Brookfield.
But, she didn’t mention that she was going to cease doing so.
Ah – completely self-obsessed. That’s more like our Elizabeth.
And not to forget the fact that times are still very tough for her (and will continue to be so for a fair while).
[Pip] “It must be so hard to have to pin a smile on and be happy”
[Elizabeth] “Just enjoy it. Enjoy it while you can”
Hmmm. There’s a cheery thought for an 18th!
The 18th that wasn’t really much ado
So Pip’s now legal, but her birthday wasn’t really up to much for an 18th.
Ach well. Pip seemed quietly satisfied.
She got a car. A nodding cow for the car (from Freddie and Lily). And some jewellery.
Plus she had a nice tea with her family.
Which is nothing to be sniffed at, considering it involved Jill’s pavlova.
- “Such an exciting day for us all”
- Do Susan and Clarrie write for Heat?
- Correction fluid?
- Susan and Clarrie chat to Camilla
- Poor old Lyndee, stuck in the lavatory
- Ah – that explains Lord Netherborne
- Too slow for Charles?
- So – she laughed, and liked the shortbread
- I refuse to even comment on Kenton and Jolene anymore
- Camilla should have stopped
- “Has anyone seen Oliver?”
“Such an exciting day for us all”
So says Lynda. But, I must admit, she doesn’t quite speak for me.
I wish no harm on the Royals, but am not particularly excited about them or their doings.
My only joy out of this particular Royal visit is the classic Lyndee moments it has helped nurture.
But ho-hum. Well done Camilla. I suppose if anything, there might be a bit of a flurry of donations and support for osteoporosis.
Do Susan and Clarrie write for Heat?
Arriving early to bag a good place to watch Camilla go by, Clarrie and Susan then go off into a ‘she’s thin, she’s fat’ commentary.
Almost like the ‘eeek! How horribly thin is she’, followed a week later with a ‘eeeek! How horribly fat is she’ in Heat magazine.
Anyhoo. The woman from the telly is too thin (and looks frozen) whereas Helen:
[Susan] “Helen looks the better for carrying more weight since she had the baby”
Correction fluid?
What is this outbreak of rudery (Jazzer re mantelpieces the other day) and *snort* suggestions?
Was that really correction fluid on Lynda’s jacket?
I hope so. The alternative is too awful to contemplate.
Susan and Clarrie chat to Camilla
After much cheering, flag waving and Susan reckoning Camilla looked in her direction – Clarrie and Susan then get to actually speak to Camilla!
Actually, they even shook her hand!!!
My. Giddy. Aunt.
And wasn’t Lynda overjoyed for them …
Poor old Lyndee, stuck in the lavatory
[Lynda] “You? The Duchess spoke to you? I’m afraid I was elsewhere when the Duchess came through reception … I was infact in the ladies when the Duchess arrived … it was a bitter blow, I’m afraid … I’m afraid I’ve missed my moment”
Ah – that explains Lord Netherborne
His osteoporosis gave Caroline and Camilla something to chat about.
[Camilla] “Poor man. Not many people realise that man are affected by it as well as women,. Is he in a lot of pain?”
And poor chap for having to have a fall just so Caroline could make small talk to Royalty.
Too slow for Charles?
[Caroline – still talking about Lord Netherborne] “His recovery is quite slow … to slow for him anyway
[Camilla] “I know the feeling …”
Did I hear that right?
Could that have been a comment on Camilla being impatient about Charles’ lack of crown?
Surely not?
So – she laughed, and liked the shortbread
Camilla did seem a nice sort, and was very nice to Ambridge’s nicest resident – Mr Ian Craig.
What was Ian’s problem with meeting Camilla, after she had especially asked for him?
Just nerves?
[Caroline] “She’s lovely. It’s just like talking to anyone else”
Caroline manages to persuade him to say help, which he does. Even though it was a tad excruciating hearing Ian bow so low that he must have scraped his forehead on the floor.
Still – Camilla did make a very apt comment when asking Ian how he wound up in Ambridge:
[Camilla] “Ambridge got its hooks into you … I imagine that happens to a lot of people”
Indeed Camilla. If only you know how very true that is for some of us. There’s a whole gaggle of Ambridge-widowers out there.
I refuse to even comment on Kenton and Jolene anymore
I can’t actually not – but must be firm that it annoys me that I have to.
I am hereby deciding that Jolene and Kenton are not going to get it on – and that I will not play along with the ‘will they, won’t they’ shenanigans.
Well … at least until they actually get interesting again .
Camilla should have stopped
Lynda is beyond consolation at missing her moment with Royalty:
[Lynda] “What have I got to look forward to? A bike ride home in the cold and dark followed by the parish council meeting”
And then her chain falls off.
But what’s this?
The sound of a car.
It slows down.
Lynda exclaims: “Oh! Your Royal Highness”
And then …
… the car carries on.
So Camilla sees Lynda struggling (in the cold and dark) with her bike, but doesn’t instruct her driver to give her some help.
I think that’s rather rude.
I’d have stopped. And I don’t even have a driver to do all the ,mucky work.
Still – mustn’t grumble – as Lynda was delighted.
[Lynda] “… I got the most charming wave and smile in return”
Her bubble can’t even be burst by Kenton and Jolene pointing out that she has oil on her face,
[Lynda] “Oh anyway. What does it matter. My own personal wave. There’s no-one else in Ambridge who can claim that!”
That’s kinda sweet, I suppose.
“Has anyone seen Oliver?”
Asks Caroline.
He was seemingly around yesterday, and is in the kitchen today, but we haven’t heard from him for many a month.
Suspicious …
- Roy has to go and see the head
- Will The Queen be upset about Ambridge Post Office closing?
- Vicky has a friend called Alice
- Here we go with Helen …
- How can one have lambs coming out of one’s ears, David?
- A use for Susan!
- It’s all bull
- The oddness of Lynda
Roy has to go and see the head
He and Hayley have decided that Phoebe should finish school a week earlier so that she can experience flying with Kate first, before she then has to do the return trip by herself.
However, I doubt we’ve heard the last of this.
[Roy] “Hayley’s not happy about any of it”
Will The Queen be upset about Ambridge Post Office closing?
Helen’s not interested in seeing The Duchess, but Susan is so excited that she’s actually shutting the Post Office.
Read that again.
Susan.
Is shutting.
The Post Office.
Wow!
But it’s okay. Susan reckons Camilla’s mother-in-law won’t be too worried.
Vicky has a friend called Alice
Have we heard about her before? I didn’t think Vicky had any friends.
Who the flump is Alice?
Here we go with Helen …
I’m a bit confused.
On the one hand, Helen has changed to the point where she can leave Henry alone in the flat while she pops down to the shop (actually – I don’t think she should have done that …), but then she exhibits perfect signs of being a tad weird.
As she was talking to Susan about Jazzer being in a grump about the sham that was his double date last night:
[Helen] “Ah. It sounded ghastly. Thank goodness I’m not part of that scene anymore. I’ve got the only man I want in my life upstairs”
Yikes! Psycho mum …
That Harry is a happy and quiet wee chap either means he is just that – happy – or that Helen is, behind the scenes, terrifying him with severe overprotective love into peaceful submission.
Time shall tell on this one, I reckon.
How can one have lambs coming out of one’s ears, David?
I’m no sheep farmer, but it sounds to me like Brookfield has a decidedly odd way of lambing.
A use for Susan!
Helen runs into the shop, just as Susan is getting ready to go home, in an utter panic.
Wee Henry has “an awful, awful rash”.
With Pat and Tony being on holiday, Helen doesn’t know who else to turn to.
And lucky Susan was there. She was able to calm Helen, and work out that Henry only had milk spots. Which are quite common (so I understand).
Panic over, Susan’s done a good deed and Helen has now learned how to read her baby advice books.
It’s all bull
Oh boy, is Ruth furious.
Once again – after promising that everything would settle down – David now decides that he needs to drive to Scotland to safely deliver General (the Bull) to his new home.
And he wants to do it over two nights. Which would mean missing Pip’s 18th birthday morning.
David’s point is that General was one of Nigel’s favourites, so he wants to be sure that Elizabeth knows he’s being taken care of properly.
Ruth’s point is that David is once again putting Elizabeth before his wife and kids… and lambs.
[Ruth] “Understand? I’ve been doing nothing but! …No David. Absolutely not … you seriously mean you’re not even going to be here for your daughter’s 18th birthday …You promised you’d be here”
[David] “I’ve promised to deliver the bull”
But – David has also promised to sort out (and hide) Pip’s car, help with the lambing, be around more often etc etc etc
[David] “I’m trying to do what’s best for everyone”
[Ruth] “Well you’re not doing what’s best for you”
David is also seemingly not sleeping well due to stress, so Ruth’s as much angry at him as she is worried.
His claim that this all “won’t be for much longer” has been said many times before, and is becoming increasingly hollow.
Despite David changing his trip to Scotland to next week – Ruth is still unhappy. It still means less help on-hand during lambing, and that David is once again looking after Elizabeth’s interests first.
She really didn’t sound like she wanted that hug from David …
The oddness of Lynda
[Roy] “I just had the most bizarre conversation with Lynda … I’ve already got Vicky wanting me to ask the Duchess if she’s excited about the wedding … now Lynda’s told me that if I get to speak to her, I’ve got to tell her about this amazing coincidence which is that Nolly and one of her grandchildren were born three days apart … Nolly’s like about 7 years older”
Roy’s confusion is that he doesn’t really see Nolly as his relation, and that this ‘coincidence’ isn’t really much of a coincidence.
Lynda odd behaviour is making Caroline regret allowing Lynda to work on the Camilla shift:
[Caroline] “ … and if I catch Lynda anywhere but behind that reception desk tomorrow …”
[Roy] “You don’t think she’s going to try and smuggle herself into the tea?”
[Caroline] “I only hope we can keep her under control …”
- At least David and Ruth have low expectations of each other
- Kate’s boxed Hayley and Roy
- Nigel’s romantic gestures
- Pre-double date
- During double date
- David’s so rubbish, Ruth chased the florist away
At least David and Ruth have low expectations of each other
Which is good, as it means no-one was upset that they only got a card from the other.
In fact, they were both quite delighted.
Kate’s boxed Hayley and Roy
Or so reckons Hayley.
Her and Roy have no choice but to let Phoebe go to South Africa (as she really, really, wants to go – plus it is an amazing chance for her) – which means Phoebe either misses school, or has to fly by herself.
Bloomin’ Kate and her bloomin’ promises.
So Hayley and Roy are now shouting at each other about which is the worst option.
[Hayley] “If he thinks I can stand there and watch Phoebe disappear off through security with someone she’s never met … and have to hope Kate remembers to pick her up the other end …”
(Hayley put a big emphasis on ‘hope’)
Nigel’s romantic gestures
It is indeed a bit of a quiet Valentine’s day in Ambridge without Nigel.
Poor Elizabeth. Instead of harpists, she takes flowers to his grave.
That’s sad. Very sad indeed.
Pre-double date
The postie hasn’t been yet, but Jazzer already reckons he’s a winner, with 4 texts to Harry’s zero.
Not that Harry’s actually cares (or so he says …)
Harry’s a bit shocked that they’re not dining their ladies – it’s a pub, then a club. they can get a chippie or a kebab if they’re hungry, and that food is just “killing time” before they can get the ladies back to the flat.
But Harry is also shocked at the very idea of the ladies coming home.
[Jazzer] “If you’re so shocked at the idea of taking the girls back to our place, how come you changed your sheets?”
Harry’s answer was that they needed to be changed anyway. Which I’d be suspect of with anyone else – but Harry, I can believe.
Whereas it would never even occur to Jazzer that sheets need changing:
[Jazzer] “What for? They’d only get all sweaty and tangled up anyway”
During double date
Not a great start.
Tasha isn’t Tasha.
Harry made a mistake, and spotted the wrong girl when he went to scope out Tasha.
Which isn’t good. As the real Tasha doesn’t seem to be much of a looker.
[Jazzer] “You don’t have to look at the mantelpiece when you poke the fire …”
(my word Jazzer – such blunt rudery in Ambridge! Well, I never).
But what’s this?
Zoe (Jazzer’s date) actually fancies Harry.
Leaving Jazzer with nae burd at all – unless he wants to lower his standards and have a go with Tasha
(poor Tasha – I’d have thought at least Harry would have been de cent enough to look beyond the surface. Maybe he is more of a normal man than I’ve given him credit for)
But Jazzer throws all of his toys out of his pram – and tries to get Harry to join him in running away while the girls are in the toilet. Which Harry won’t do. As that would be rude.
[Jazzer] “Have both of them if you’re man enough … just don’t keep me awake with the heid board banging”
I somehow don’t think that will be happening …
David’s so rubbish, Ruth chased the florist away
Bless.
David had organised flowers for Ruth – but she was so sure (and used) to him not even thinking about her, that she tried to tell him to go elsewhere.
Ah well. All’s well.
Ruth’s chuffed.
Even to the point that she seemed to suggest she wanted carnal knowledge of her hubby in the lambing shed.
*shudder*
- Nigel’s racing mice
- Classic ghost stories aren’t appropriate
- Will no-one think of Eileen Titcombe?
- Royalty and a gluten free lady
- Do Royalty use the toilet?
- “I can’t settle to anything”
- Have we forgotten Phil already?
- Lynda glazes Ian
- Oliver lives!
- Enough already, Kenton and Jolene
Nigel’s racing mice
Kenton is proving to be quite a responsible and nice chap these days – well, at least when it comes to his niece and nephew.
He’s taken Lily and Freddie to the Science Museum today. Although they didn’t want to stay long (they do worry about mummy), but Kenton did have time to tell them of some happy memories about their father.
Kenton told them about Nigel’s racing mice.
[Kenton] “He even got Shula knitting them little racing jerseys …”
Freddie was quite tickled to realise that this wasn’t a childhood hobby – it was his dad in his thirties.
Ah Nigel. You did make us giggle.
Classic ghost stories aren’t appropriate
According to Elizabeth.
She seems to be quite annoyed that Lily is engrossed in a book – and thinks she shouldn't be reading it because it’s a ghost story. Even though Kenton reckons it’s a classic.
What’s wrong? The book itself (which we didn’t get to hear the title of), or that Lily is engrossed?
Will no-one think of Eileen Titcombe?
According to Elizabeth, one of the results of Lily having her head in a book is her not keeping her bedroom today.
Which just simply isn’t fair on Eileen and her vacuum.
Quite.
(though “vacuum” shows Elizabeth’s class – it’s most definitely a hoover in ma hoose!)
Royalty and a gluten free lady
Phew! Ian is going to have his work cut out for him.
And doesn’t he sound nervous.
Do Royalty use the toilet?
Lynda certainly seems to think so, and she’d be one I’d trust to know.
[Lynda] “Have you given any thought to the cloakroom arrangements?”
For goodness sake woman! Not content with forcing your way back onto shift, you now want to go to the toilet with Camilla.
Enough already. You’ll only embarrass yourself.
“I can’t settle to anything”
With the kids off to the Science Museum, Elizabeth has time to think.
Which isn’t comfortable for her at all.
[Jill] “Darling, it is how it is, I’m afraid, You're going to feel like that for a good while yet … it’s when there’s nothing to do and you’re by yourself. You start thinking.”
Have we forgotten Phil already?
Not quite, as the year anniversary of his death was on a non-eavesdropping day.
Quite startling to compare Nigel’s horrific to Phil’s rather gently fitting death.
But then again, Phil wouldn’t have been daft enough to have gone up on that roof.
Playing the piano to pigs was more his style.
Lynda glazes Ian
Lynda just isn’t going to give up on her dreams of a close brush with Camilla.
Being caught by Ian practising the moment she is introduced to Camilla:
[Lynda] “On wants to have a few conversational gambits to the ready … I have discovered the most similarities between her life and mine”
Seemingly Lynda reckons they will be bosom buddies are they are both grandmothers, and have a grandchild born in October.
Lynda seems to have missed the point that she isn’t actually due to be introduced during the Royal visit.
[Caroline] “You've got that glazed look Ian. What’s she been saying?”
[Ian] “Something about babies and being presented to the Duchess …”
[Caroline] “What? She’s not satisfied with being on the desk. She’s trying to gate-crash the tea now!”
Oliver lives!
Hurrah! He has been spotted tasting Ian’s samples of the food he’ll cook for Camilla.
Phew. I was about to head round to dig up Caroline’s patio.
Must say that he is being a tad useless. Didn’t he hand over the reins to Ed so that he could be of more use to Caroline at Grey Gables?
Enough already, Kenton and Jolene
[Kenton] “We’ll have to get together after the event and compare notes”
Kenton’s checking when Jolene’s has her days off, so that they can get together again to see how they did during Valentine’s.
[Kenton] “See who did best at fleecing the gullible romantics of Borchester”
Fair enough. They’re in the same trade. They’re both having Valentine’s themed evenings. And they have time on their hands.
One should never assume that just because two folks are single and spending time together that they’re being, or heading towards being, ‘intimate’ – but surely these two are making enough hints collectively for one of them to do something about it?
I reckon they would make a grand couple.
Even though Kenton would – yet again – be under the shadow of Saint Sid.
- It’s the Graham Ryder meeting
- Lewis has bronchitis
- Jill’s “honey lyptus might just be the thing”
- Pip’s car is red
- Harry has a pulse!
- Matt has a point about The Bull
- Bert’s holding the hurdle, Ruth’s tying it
It’s the Graham Ryder meeting
Which David comes back from in a very chirpy mood.
Not sure if it will actually make any real difference to Ruth.
While she doesn’t get her afternoon nap, David gets to fall asleep while he’s later opening the wine.
Hmmm.
Lewis has bronchitis
Poor chap.
That might also cause a few more headaches for Elizabeth and the rest of Lower Loxley.
But never fear. Jill is on her way with chicken and ‘other goodies’ …
Jill’s “honey lyptus might just be the thing”
Steady on there!
Pip’s car is red
That’s all Ruth can mind on about the car Kenton’s chosen for her.
David has to be arm wrestled into making Kenton find Pip a car for her birthday, that Ruth can’t even remember the make of.
Nice parents. Lucky Pip will be turning 18, so doesn’t have to utterly depend on them.
Should we be sending a food parcel over to Ben and Josh?
Harry has a pulse!
And then even a pint of Shires.
Who’d have thunk it. At least he’s not an utter lamppost …
Jazzer has decided Harry needs to come on a double date with him, as he’s after a lassie who insists on taking her friend with her.
So Harry has agreed, even though he reckons double dates are a
[Harry] “ … recipe for disaster … Jazz has an answer for everything”
(‘Jazz’? Sounds like a term of endearment to me.)
Harry has scoped out his date (he had a quick look at her while she was working, in a café, on Wednesday), and:
[Harry] “She was really attractive … I’m looking forward to meeting her … I get to go out with a pretty girl, Jazzer wants to line up his next conquest”
Surely this can’t go at all well for anyone involved?!?
Matt has a point about The Bull
Matt’s making his move on Jolene.
[Matt] “I’ve noticed you’ve been worried about the pub …(I asked a mate that) if this pub were ever to come up for sale, what would be the chances of developing it for residential purposes … and it’s very good news for you …”
It would seem The Bull could easily be turned into flats, and the car park into muse cottages.
And clever old Matt – he even manages to make out that Jolene would be doing a good thing for Ambridge if she sold up and The Bull became flats. He reckons that Ambridge has a shortage of housing.
[Matt] “People get very upset, but when a pub business becomes unviable, it doesn’t have to be a total loss to the community”
So – Jolene would actually be helping the community.
And it sounded like she bought into Matt’s pitch. She even checked Matt would be interested in buying.
[Jolene] “But I wouldn’t want anything getting out. Not til I’ve made up my mind”
Course, Matt’s lips are well and truly sealed. He needs Jolene to be kept from harassment so that she concentrates on what’s best for her.
And actually – Matt’s right (though quote devious).
If The Bull is so important to Ambridge residents, why is it so quiet? Would it actually be missed if hardly anyone is in there these days?
[Jolene] “Maybe the village pub has had its day”
[Harry] “Just remember you’re the heart and soul of this community .. .as soon as the weather warms up back in droves … trust me, I’m a milkman”
Eh? When were milkmen ever trustworthy?!?
And, name me one time since Sid died that Jolene has been anything but a moping misery, bringing down the entire spirit of The Bull?
What is Harry on about? Does he have some sort of vested interest in The Bull?
Bert’s holding the hurdle, Ruth’s tying it
(which is all something to do with lambing, my fellow non-agricultural eavesdroppers)
Ah – nice to have the dulcet tones of Bert back in Ambridge.
His back must be better, and in good time too for the lambing.
While some may say that it was Bert who put David to sleep before he could open his wine, I was riveted by the sheer wealth of information I learned from Bert about Gloucester Cows.
They are dual purpose (good for milk, good for beef).
Were triple purpose back in the day:
[Bert] “used them as draught animals in the olden days”
(which doesn’t mean that they were used to keep rooms toasty – it means they pulled stuff. I only know because I looked it up …)
And, the first smallpox vaccine came from a Gloucester cow.
Excellent. That’s a classic Archers moment, thank you very much Mr Fry.
